Second birth.. was it a different experience to your first?

[blossomstar]

Due my second baby in just over 2 weeks. Had a horrible first birth.. and can't help but feel it's going to be exactly the same again... any reassurance? X

Following out of interest as expecting number 2

My first was horrific - back to back - ended up having epidural and forceps and I couldn’t get up to move around so wasn’t an easy labour. 2nd couldn’t have been more different - contractions all day finally getting to the point o needed to go to hospital by about 9pm - arrived at hospital 9.15pm, daughter was born by 9.35pm!!!

Very.
1st was nearly a 2 day labour (a week overdue) and planned homebirth ended up being transferred to hospital (on my own car, so not a comfy ride!) and having pethidine and an epidural (that didn't work).
2nd was a 6 hour labour and homebirth. Only bad part was DH forgot to put the hot water on so post labour Bath wasn't nice!

Mine were very different.

Birth 1 = crash c-section, life/death situation, baby in special care for 5 days with sepsis.

Birth 2 = elective c-section, all very calm.

First birth 15 hours, really hard time, back labour, epidural, exhausted for days. Second one, done and dusted in three hours, a bit of demerol, no tearing, felt amazing afterwards.

Mine was the opposite. I think the rule is, you just can't know as there are so many determinants on how a birth will go. I found the un-met expectation of an easier birth second time round very hard and traumatic to process. I think you just need to go into knowing you can't know.

I had a horrendous first birth. When I went into labour with my second I was terrified - shaking/teeth chattering with fear, begging my husband to do something so that it wouldn't be the same (not sure what I thought he could do but I was so scared I'd lost the run of myself). An hour later my dd slid out completely painlessly and quickly. No pain, no stitches, just so easy. I was euphoric afterwards. Fingers crossed and sending best wishes for the same for you.

Thanks everyone!! I'm Praying!!!! Xx

1st awful - second fantastic birth :) felt like I had won the lottery x

First was forceps and a very long labour. Second was a piece of cake!!

Yes had to be induced early waters breaking
needed epidural for him first birth
full
labour start to finish 46hrs

second one textbook laboured at home comfortable 12 hrs
went in 4cm and had her 3 hrs later no complixations at all
i so was shocked!
praying for the same this time round

Mine were very different.
1st - natural birth 2 weeks overdue, Diamorphine (wore off), no epidural as no anaesthetist available so no pain relief, back-to-back, 3rd degree tear, retained placenta (had to be removed under GA), PPH & transfusion.
2nd - induction by pessary a week early, baby in correct position & dialated; few hours later labour not really progressing - found baby had done a u-turn back up the canal & was lying oblique; told now needed a c-section as waters had all gone & at risk of cord prolapse & infection; c-section & no further complications.
I was so scared of a repeat of my first birth but 2nd birth was much better on balance.

Second was much quicker. I also managed the contractions more easily without gas and air for the second. That's not a boast- 1st baby I had to go without gas and air for around 45 minutes while the midwife got more and I just could not cope with the pain- it was horrific, second baby I had a 45 minute drive to the hospital with full on contractions, plus getting from car, through hospital, in lift, etc, and it was very painful, but I don't remember that absolute feeling of not being able to cope and wanting someone to just cut me open right now!

First baby I had in water and my body just pushed. So that was a shock with the second when I realised I actual had to do something to get him out!

Thank you for your post. I think the assumption is always that second births will be easier, so it's a new type of pressure (and if it doesn't work out that way, its a new thing to fail at, as if the type of birth you have isn't judged enough!). My first birth was brilliant - a quick and happy home birth, with no complications or problems. I'm now pregnant again and already anxious it won't work out so well this time around. I think being honest about that, and the fact that each birth is very unique, is important

Mine was faster. Much faster. And very easy, no tears or stitches. Good luck, as with anything I just is what it is. No reason to think it will be as hard as first time though.

1st 26hrs and needing forceps

2nd faster than a speeding bullet, no time to think, was over and done with within an hour of making it to the hospital.

Totally different. Had my 2nd at home. Quick, straightforward, no stitches. Good luck x

I agree with @sunshinealwayscomesback , I had a similar, but slightly worse delivery second time around and felt I’d been robbed as ‘seconds are quicker, earlier, easier etc’.

First - waters went first, went into labour naturally 6 hours later, long and slow labour for 4 days, baby born by ventouse with lots of stitches and infection for both me and baby. Delivered a week early.

Second - waters went first, induced 36 hours later, long and slow labour for 3 days, incredibly painful as back to back, baby born by ventouse with lots of stitches. Infection for baby and me. Delivered 8 days late.

First was horrendous - back to back baby, waters broke but cervix would not dilate, so was given induction drugs to speed things up which didn’t work. Ended up with an epidural that became dislodged, a spinal block that travelled too high, episiotomy and forceps delivery. Baby was born with a collapsed lung and pneumonia requiring five days in NICU.

My second was a breeze. Waters broke at 7:15pm and was told I was 4cm dilated, DS was in my arms by 10:45pm. Three pushes and he was out, only needed gas and air.

Best of luck OP.

Yes. I had SPD in both but the first was much worse, I was barely able to walk in the final few weeks. Very long labour with the first, 36 hours, resulting in an induction, emergency section and a postpartum hemorrhage.

I knew my body a lot better the second time around and what to expect. I had SPD but it was easier. I an epidural as soon as I got to the hospital. Manage to give birth vaginally after an 18 hour labour but I did have an episiotomy. Stayed in the hospital longer than necessary really as I knew getting back to a toddler with SPD was going to be horrible. I had a lot more help around the at home with this one as well. Still not a breeze but better than the first.

First born at 39+3. Fast and furious labour - less than 5 hours from waters going to birth, but included 2 hours pushing and no let up between contractions. I felt out of control. I didn't recognise much of what NCT/hypnobirthing said would happen.

Second stayed in until 41 weeks and then I had 48 hours of latent labour before things actually got going. However the actual active labour with DS2 was genuinely one of the best experiences of my life. I officially got to 4cm at 5pm, and baby was born in water at 7.53pm after six (!) minutes pushing. I didn't want or have any pain relief apart from the pool. I had my own music playing and support from my lovely DH and that was all I needed.

I think my second birth was so much better through a combination of luck, knowing what to expect, and also MWs listening to me a bit more because I wasn't a first timer.

I'll just mirror most posters but 1st was 4.5 hours and a bit complicated 2nd I honestly thought I was going to give birth in the car, 55 minutes from waters breaking to baby!

My first was so difficult it played a huge part in why I have 10 years between my first and my second born, my second was a walk in the park by comparison.

First took two long days to arrive. Painful, exhausting, out of control. Second came in about an hour. I felt in control and physically capable. There were parts of it I actively enjoyed.