Worried Expectant Mum (early pregnancy medication, flu and alcohol worries)

[firsttimelondonmummy]

Just found out I’m unexpectedly pregnant.
(last period 14th of Sept, tested positive 12th of October).
My pregnancy was extremely unexpected and I’m having a bit of a panic.
I’d been on medication for an injury (Pregabalin (took 4 tabs) and Dihydrocoedine (15 tabs ish) I also had the flu for 2 weeks (26th September- 10th of October) and had a couple of big nights out 8/10 cocktails and smoking (max 4-5 per day) and vaped.
I stopped everything the day we found out, got onto supplements, been eating extremely healthily but I feel so guilty and can’t help being spooked by google 😭 has anyone had a similar experience and a healthy baby? Thanks in advance from a panicking, surprised first time expecting mum x

First of all you didn't know and although it's easy to say not to worry of course you will worry.

No one can give you a straight answer as every pregnancy is different. Do contact someone about your worries though and they might be able to get you in for an early scan.

Wishing you a healthy pregnancy and please try not to worry you didn't know you were pregnant xx

Thank you, it’s just so hard not to worry 😭
I have self referred to my local hospital and entered all the details but paid for my own early scan next Friday.
I had an awful call with a GP who basically said to abort and made me feel so guilty and said I’ll have to wait till 20 weeks to know if I’ve done any damage and it honestly broke me.
I just can’t believe it happened now with all I’ve been going through!

Wow, that GP needs to have a complaint made against them! That's a really disgustingly awful thing to say to anyone but especially someone who is already worried.

How far along will you be at your scan?

Your GP said to abort? That's dreadful and very unprofessional.

Given the dates, you found out you were pregnant immediately, ie right at four weeks. The embryo hasn't even attached fully to your blood stream at that point and is living off its yolk sac. It might be damaging to do those things at a later point in pregnancy but the embryo (a tiny and simple ball of cells) won't at that point have been damaged by it. Unless someone is actively TTC (and this doesn't account for all or even the majority of babies born) they aren't going to behave as if pregnant before missing a period. Your baby will be fine. But if you weren't taking any vitamins before, be scrupulous about the folic acid.

Have a happy and healthy pregnancy.

Also I wouldn't have a scan yet unless you would have had one anyway. There won't be very much to see. (It might reassure you that two weeks earlier the conceptus was in a very primitive state.)

It’s weird because her saying that was what made my mind up to try and hold the pregnancy and hope for a healthy pregnancy.

i have found the whole thing incredibly confusing… my last period was September 14th so my scan will be 6 weeks and 2 days from then.
My understanding from google was that you can have a transvaginal ultrasound 2 weeks after a positive test (I tested positive 12th of Sept) or at 6 weeks.

As I said this was all extremely unexpected so feeling very lost :(

This is so reassuring thank you! @hopsalong thank you 🙏🏼
Yes, she was pretty horrible and basically told me I was abusing alcohol.
She made me feel so ashamed for two nights out I had without knowing I was pregnant and I’d explained I was going through injury recover.
I found out I was positive two days before my period was due and and stopped everything the minute I found out.
I started on the Pregnacare Original a couple of days after finding out and have been on them ever since.
Been getting lots of veggies and fruit in and adhering to all advice.
Hoping all is well.
I think I just want the scan to try and hear a heartbeat 😭

Make a complaint. You’ll find hundreds of posts on here about women drinking when they didn’t know they were pregnant (me included, 2 bottles of wine, 4 weeks pregnant, child now 7), smoking would have no effect for such a short time. Nor would the flu. Baby isn’t even implanted until what’s classed as week 4 so don’t worry. And do complain about the doctor again.

and if you want the baby then congratulations.

Below 4 weeks the baby is a bundle of cells. Each cell can replicate and become another cell. If too many cells are damaged baby miscarries but otherwise nothing else should have an effect. After a longer time cells are set in what they are and that’s where there can sometimes be issues

@Shockmeafter this is the first time I’ve told anyone and I’m so reassured to here that it’s not normal behaviour.
I’ve felt so much shame over that call for the last week and it’s caused a lot of concern for both myself and my partner.
We definitely do want the baby so now just hoping we hold and have a healthy pregnancy and baby.
thank you so much for your well wishes and for sharing your experience 🙏🏻

To hear *
not me excitedly typing now I feel a weight of guilt has lifted from my shoulders 😭💖

@Shockmeafter I wish I had come on to mumsnet earlier to seek advice, this has given me so much relief. We said if we lost it naturally it wasn’t meant to be but at least we tried to hold and I did everything I could from finding out to try and hold a healthy pregnancy. After hearing the responses on this thread I think I am going to lodge a complaint. My partner was really concerned we should abort after what she said. So glad we decided against 😭💖

Hey op
I am on medication for chronic pain and was assessed throughout my pregnancy
In the beginning I was on gabapentin (x9 per day), cocodomal (x8 per day) and oxycodone (250mg per day)
When I delivered I'd come off the oxycodone but was still taking 3 gabapentin a day and changed to 8 dihydrocoedine with paracetamol
Healthy full term pregnancy

Bumps is useful to look at

Glad to have helped. You’ll encounter an awful lot of misinformation. Have a read of Emily Oster’s book Expecting Better and take charge and ownership of your own health.

(btw it was literally 2 bottles of wine and about 3 cocktails too. Had no idea!)

And also I told the doctor about how much I drank and he just laughed…..

@greenisblack Firstly I’m sorry to hear you are in chronic pain. Nerve damage was the worst thing I’ve experienced pain wise. People who live with chronic pain are unbelievably strong super humans 💖
This is also extremely reassuring, so thank you so so much for sharing your experience with me 🙏🏼

Oh OP I’ve been there. When I found out I was pregnant I hadn’t expected it at all (I didn’t think it was possible!) and I’d just been on a week holiday that was pretty a much a bender from start to finish. Uncharacteristically so, as we were celebrating 🤦🏼‍♀️ I was also on medication for something else which I stopped the moment I found out. I can’t say I didn’t panic my entire pregnancy- I did, I was under the perinatal health team because of it (they were absolutely fucking brilliant and are still supporting me now I’m dealing with breast cancer at 6 months pp) and I paid for a ton of extra scans but my baby is fine. As everyone told me she probably would be, because no one who doesn’t expect to get pregnant behaves as though she is. All the best ❤️

@Shockmeafter I love reading so I’ll start that tomorrow! thank you for the recommendation 🙏🏼
She made me feel like the devil.
It was weird as well because I only drank like that twice once around conception which I threw up the next day around 27th sept (thought this was weird as I never throw up but negative test the week after) then once Saturday 8th oct and no symptoms that time.
Hindsight is a wonderful thing….
Relieving to hear everyone else’s stories though.
I think you hear a lot about accidental drinking sessions.
It was that paired with the horrible GP, flu and meds that was really concerning me!

Oh I forgot, I also had the flu in the first trimester (it was the temperature that worried me) and covid in my third trimester (didn’t feel ill at all really but had to check in with midwives every day) and I am an ANXIOUS person so my poor perinatal mental health team had a full on job 😂 bit it was all perfectly fine. My baby was breech so was a c section birth but she was super strong and perfect ❤️

@WorryMcGee firstly I’m very sorry to hear you are going through breast cancer and can’t wait to hear when you announced you kicked it in the butt! Sending you all the kicking butt energy! 💖
I’m quite anxious generally with my health.
I had a breast cancer scare a few months ago. They decided after an ultrasound and MRI that my breasts just change really often and I have numerous cysts but the constant changing and lumps and fibrous changes are very unsettling and something I know will trouble me throughout pregnancy on top of everything else.
I think as you mentioned I’ll be an extra scanner and book some private health checks and hoping this will reassure me as I hopefully head further into the pregnancy. 💖

No idea about the medication but completely forget about the alcohol and smoking. My midwife told me it's incredibly common for women to do this before finding out and it's not something you should dwell on.

I also always get ill in pregnancy due to lowered immune system and no one's ever been concerned.

@WorryMcGee you really are super mum!
I’m very anxious too and every time someone tells me I need to relax as it’s not good for the pregnancy it just makes me more anxious.
late night google sessions aren’t helping either.
This forum feels way more constructive 😭🙏🏼💖

@sunmole thank you 🙏🏼
Feeling way more positive after seeing all of these posts 😭💖

iv Been suffering with really bad depression, anxiety and paranoia, through my whole pregnancy, I’m now 23 weeks and starting to see the other side.

I have beaten myself in to misery, thinking I damaged my baby, causing insomnia and (here we say it) drinking 5/6 units a night, fortunately I still haven’t smoked, vaped yes, but no cigarettes.

I am also on anti depression, anti psychotic medication but been taking extensive vitamins for years.

so, in my constant paranoia, I have taken myself off to several private scans, all showing normal, as well as reading many medical papers (I work in the medical field) that actually show (although understand that I am at higher risk) quite the extent you would need to be abusing yourself, to cause extensive damage.

AND that’s without the social, environment, nutritional, bmi, home and work/ stress factors….

so chill, you can’t do owt, just eat the fridge contents and incubate for the next few months. Nothing you can do but the odds are, you are fine. you arnt the only one

Can you pay to see a private GP? The one you spoke to sounds horrendous. It’s not for her to judge your situation, particularly as you didn’t even know you were pregnant! But you be fair even if you had known you were pregnant but we’re looking for support it’s not for her to offer such a shockingly judgemental opinion.
I once paid to see a private GP when I felt I wasn’t being taken seriously and the difference it made speaking to someone who actually had time for me was amazing (obviously you’re paying for their time! But some things are worth paying for).