Abortion or not

[Clopez]

Hi,

I'm 39 years old and I have just found out that I'm pregnant with my third child. My husband and I have been together for 11 years. We tried to conceive for more than 5 years before starting our painful IVF journey at the age of 35. My first IVF round was a NHS funded and it ended in a complex miscarriage that required 2 D&C surgeries. After that we had two more private IVF rounds that resulted in my 2 daughters now age 16 months and 2 years and 8 months. Now just found I'm naturally pregnant after more than 11 years trying and it has come in the worst time of my life. I have two very demanding young girls, my job is not very secure at the moment as the company is in financial difficulties, i spent all my savings with the IVF treatments and I'm 39 years old. I'm not sure if I should terminate this pregnancy as I dont know if I will regret my entire life. This has always been my dream and I dont know how to deal with this. My family lives in Spain so I do not have much help or support here. If I have the baby I will have a newborn, 2 years and 3 years old!!! Plus financial problems. Can someone give me some advise? I feel really guilty.

Your oldest dd will be able to get free nursery hours before you have this baby.
I personally dont think finances should weigh too much in a decision of this magnitude. Money comes and goes.The phrase permanent solution for a temporary problem comes to.mind.
It's got to be emotional decision rather than a practical one, I think, considering all you have gone through.

It's urgent and stressful now but think about how you will feel if you get the abortion. Relieved or OMG what have I done? I've made both choices so no judgment. It depends whether the problems are temporary (not a good time, will be hard at the beginning) or permanent (don't want another child).

Good luck x

I think it might be time to consult someone and explore the option of ending your pregnancy. Exploring it doesn't mean you have to commit to it, but it's about finding out all the information so you can make an informed choice.

You may decide that actually, you want to proceed and that's okay. You may decide it isn't right to proceed and that's okay too.

Whatever you choose is your decision and absolutely noone else's to make. I am personally pro-choice. You should be able to choose what is best for you, your family and your life. I also think it's all well and good people suggesting finances shouldn't be a factor as that's a practical consideration and this is an emotional one, but they truly are. Especially if you do already have two children.

I haven't been through anything like this but I am certainly an empathetic and understanding ear if it is needed.

What did you do. I'm in exact same situation

What did you end up doing?