Severe miscarriage paranoia

[Usernamesonly]

If I've worked out my dates correctly I will be 8 weeks this Sunday. I have booked an early private scan but that isn't for another week and a half. I am full of anxiety and paranoia of having a miscarriage. I already have one DS, have never experienced a miscarriage before but I am absolutely consumed with the thought that when I go to this private scan there will be no heart beat, an empty sac, etc. it's all I can think about, I want to cry all the time, and even though I'm telling myself it's just pregnancy anxiety my brain is also "well trust your gut,etc". I feel like I'm going crazy. I never experienced anything mentally like this with my DS. Is this some level of normal? Anyone else experienced the same? I haven't yet had a letter for my first midwife appointment so can't get approach the midwife team for help or advice. Surely this isn't normal 😢

I'm exactly same, second pregnancy and didn't feel like this with the first. I'm 17 weeks now and had two private scans inbetween nhs ones I cant shake the feeling something will go wrong

@hellosunshineagainxxx it's absolutely horrible isn't it. I feel like I'm going crazy. Were the midwife's able to help you at all? I can't go on longer like this, it's awful. I really don't know how I'm going to wait a week and a half for the private scan. I didn't want to go too early incase it was too early to hear the heartbeat which would have tipped me over the edge even more. But this week and a half is going to drag.

Not so far no, I had PND with my last so they are already keeping a close eye on me. I'm hoping after 20 week scan I will calm down a bit also when I start to get regular movements that they will be enough to reassure me

I felt exactly the same as you, had so many scans I lost count and genuinely didn’t think I’d have a healthy baby at the end of it. I was a mess the whole pregnancy.

Shes now 7.

I ended up getting help from the perinatal mental health team, please speak to your midwife x

I was the same. I found lots of private scans helped a bit but almost as soon as I was out of the scan room I would start feeling awful again. It got a bit better as I went further on and could feel movement but then I became obsessed with worrying I hadn't felt movement! It's really hard. I just had to tell myself it was because i loved the baby so much that I was worrying and that it was a lesson for being a parent!! And then try and manage the anxiety by writing diary, getting outside, keeping busy etc. what definitely doesn't help is google or mumsnet pregnancy threads!!

@YoSofi My goodness it's so reassuring to hear it's not just me. I struggle to speak with DH about it as it sounds so silly when I say it out loud. It sounds even sillier when I start crying about something I'm purely just worried about!

Seeming as I haven't had a letter for a first appointment yet I might just call the midwifery team to check in about that, and then maybe broach the subject of how anxious and paranoid I'm feeling. It's effecting work and when I'm home in the evenings I cannot concentrate on anything because I'm so worried!

@bravelittletiger I wish there was a place local to me which could privately conduct early scans, just so I can see there's something there and it's OK. Unfortunately the private scanning place local to me can only conduct scans after 7 weeks and ask that you don't book in until 3 weeks after a positive test. If there did do the early early scans I would be there straight away. I'm thankful we have private clinics though, because there's no way I could wait like this until 12 weeks!

And yes, you're right. I have spent far too long sitting on mumsnet threads about missed miscarriages, symptoms, signs, etc. Probably where so much of my paranoia comes from! Google doesn't help either as it just states how common they are 😥

@Usernamesonly it's because at 6 weeks you may or may not see a fetus shaped thing and may or may not see a heartbeat, and also need specific internal bits of kit. All this means it can so easily make people MORE anxious for no reason. From 7 it's clearer as they should see heartbeat and a rough fetus shape (though not limbs yet)

I hear you on anxiety though - we have had an end of trimester 1 loss and I'm not sure when exactly I will feel less worried about this pregnancy...

I found early pregnancy a really anxious and stressful time. I felt like I couldn’t let myself be too happy and excited incase I jinxed it.

Mumsnet is great for some things but I think it’s not always helpful in early pregnancy because there’s so many stories of miscarriage.
I absolutely understand why people need and want to talk about it, but I think it’s not always what you need to be reading about when you’re in early pregnancy.

Hope the next few weeks go as quickly as they can - try to keep busy and keep your mind occupied with other things.