How to afford maternity leave?

[Frida9]

Hi, just wondering what others are planning to do to afford maternity leave? I'm due in February and everyone (my mum, sister, mother-in-law, boss) is saying I should take a full years maternity leave because I'm entitled and I'll love being with baby. I'm not doubting I'll love it but I'll be surviving on £12k after tax next year and really can't afford that. Basically my husband will be left to pay the mortgage and all bills which I feel really guilty about, his work is manic and stressful as it is.
Am I being daft to think about going back after 9 months? I'm planning on staying at my current job for 3 months once I go back (legally need to for my maternity pay) and looking for a better paid job after that (currently public sector so really bad wages).

No he doesn't because he enables us to live in a house with a garden and not my bedsit flat we were in before. He enabled us to buy furniture for our house, he makes it so that I haven't worried about taking maternity leave. I would never be able to afford the things I have without my partner paying for it (and we don't have a lavish life style). And I'm not having HIS baby, I'm having OUR baby. It is my choice as much as his, he didn't force me. My husband already knows that he has to stay in a job that makes him miserable so that we can have a family and so I can afford to be at home for a few months.

I'll also be going back after 9 months, I'm not too worried about it as its much longer than relatives in other countries had and they're doing fine :)

Don't forget you accrue annual leave when you're on mat leave which is quite generous usually in the public sector, ask if you can carry any over from this year we can carry five days.
You could get another 6 weeks off before you back but on full pay. Can you start to save now to build a pot for those months you're not earning? Have you saved anything at all to cover your mat leave?

I had a feb baby and only did 9 months off, it was the perfect amount really.

I have to agree, a year is a long time and your thankful for the break of going to work

Oh you can also do up to ten KIT days in the latter part of mat leave and they have to pay you for those

@Frida9 it does depend how much he earns but it's always worth an application in case you're entitled to something. Anything small can help.
We didn't think we were entitled to anything after doing all the benefits calculators but I just did an application anyway and we got around £250 each month which really helped with the low SMP.

You'll also be able to claim child benefit when they're born and that's about £85-ish a month

I went back to my dayjob after 3 months, I had to, am sole breadwinner and that's when a salary reduction would have kicked in. I was back at my desk for my freelance work within 10 days after c/s, baby next to me in a basket. Tbh I don't do well with not working so was fine with it. It was all fine. A year of not working and looking after a baby would literally have killed me. That's just me though. Everyone is different.

Plenty of people only take 9 months, there is nothing strange about it. I did, you can use annual leave to add on the end make it a bit longer which is what I did and it meant I went back when DS was just under 1.

Also echo others about savings. You need to try and save as much as you can in the meantime and cut back where possible for when your wage drops. We saved a few thousand before TTC/during pregnancy and it really helped.

You are not living off him though, your family is living off the money he brings in. For that period of time you are off, your contribution is not monetary but in looking after your baby in the first few months.

Try to take out the emotions and look at what you can afford and what makes financial sense. Your baby will be fine whether you go back at 6/7/8/9/10 months. For what it’s worth with my first I had 13 months off inc annual leave and with my second I am going back at 7 months and DH is taking 5 months shared parental leave.

You will get child benefit once baby is here, and don’t forget tax free childcare once you start paying for childcare.

I only had 4 months off. Couldn't afford the drop in wages or for there to be any lasting impact on my career - seen a few too many women suffer the consequences of being gone for a year.

But what if they can't fill the gaps.

Lots of family's can't financially survive on one wage and MAT pay.

Took a year with DC1. Found out we’re expecting DC2 and planning to take 9 or 10 months due to income drop. Also because I hope they’ll be weaned during the day by then (I managed to breastfeed and was only doing morning and evening feeds with DC1 at the same age). I don’t get anything more than statutory and mortgage payments were painful last time. We obliterated our savings too, just to survive. It’s better now I’m back at work but £600 on part time childcare is a huge chunk of change, some months are still uncomfortable (I’m not sure when I last bought clothes because I wanted to). Tbh I wish there was a culture of people taking less time because you’re made to feel guilty if you don’t take the full year.

Hi OP I’m in a similar boat. I’m due DC2 in January and wondering how we’ll cope. I think with mat pay and child benefit well receive in the region of £700 a month which is about a third of my usual salary. At the moment I’m planning on transferring all of my maternity pay and child benefit to the joint account, and DP will be working overtime to make up the difference, but like you I feel guilty about this. Everyone says I shouldn’t as being at home all day with a baby is no joke and it’s a decision we made together but I understand the feeling.

I’m taking the 9 months maternity and tagging my annual leave and accrued bank holidays to the end of my mat leave which means I’ll be off for around 11 months which I’m happy with.

I have been saving what I can and hoping to have around 2k in savings when I finish which will be my money for anything the kids need, coffees out with friends, baby groups etc and any unexpected costs that crop up.

We are fortunate that my husband earns enough even if I dont work but I will for sure go back after 9 months max to use my brain on sth not baby related. I managed dozens of maternity leaves in my team over the years and every time the new mother would ring me to ask if they can come back earlier as they actually wanted to do some work. I will be the same aka looking forward to doing some work.

I’m due in January and only planning to be off 6 months as I love my job and whilst I’m sure being a mum will keep me busy, I don’t want to completely lose my identity. DH is happy to pick up the financial slack whilst I’m off work, but I’ve also been saving £1500 from my salary each month to help lessen the load/cover any unexpected costs whilst I’m off.

I went back after 6 months with DD because we had some large expenses to cover so you're not being unreasonable to go back at 9 months. What I will say is that I felt it was too soon to go back when I was physically dealing with it - there were a lot of tears! - so just take that into consideration, its tough leaving them when they're still so small.

This time, largely because of what I've said above, I'm taking the full year. When my SMP ends I'm taking my holidays and spreading them equally over the last three months. I'll actually be better off when it ends than I am just now. Until then I've done a few KIT days to top up my pay and have been using a little savings for things like birthday presents and starting to think about Christmas.

There is no guarantee you will love your maternity leave. It was certainly nothing like I imagined it would be!

I was totally ready to go back at 10 months and planning to go back at 9 for my second pregnancy.

I took a year, once the money stopped after 9 months I started my 10 KIT days which topped up my last few months! You could then use any annual leave to get paid for the last month.
you don’t have to commit to anything with work, tell them a year and if you want to go back earlier then do that nearer the time.
we we’re in a similar position in my partner had to pay all the bills and I hated it! However I loved my year off with my baby, and I didn’t want to go back to work 😢
also nursery costs meant I might as well max out the maternity while I could 😂

That is the point. Nobody should be feeling guilty - not you, not him - because this is a shared undertaking.

Why are you so bloody determined to do yourself down that you're arguing with people on your side?

Agree with a pp that it’s all relative! I’m in france where mat leave is full pay for 12 weeks. A LOT of babies go to crèche from 10 weeks & mums go back to work. I’ve taken longer and most people are surprised! I’ve struggled to find baby groups as everyone is back at work. I then felt I was the only one with baby at home so he’s now gone to crèche a couple of days a week 😂 do whatever you think is best all round. There’s no rules! Good luck & congrats xo

Moving my mother in, taking 3 months at full maternity pay then going back to work. Will go to office 1/2 days a week and WFH the rest of the time.

Saves £1400 a month in childcare and mum doesn't have to go back to work. Works for everyone.

I went back after 10 months and I was doing KIT days monthly from when my baby was 3months - startled doing the payroll again in the evenings each month when it was due ! SO that was nice extra cash.

I’d had enough of mat leave by then anyway and was happy to be back at work tbh

i love my baby and being with her but I was fed up being home all day and wandering around the neighbourhood e everyday

i enjoy being back in work tbh

But as you've said it's your husbands child too and therefore he'll be paying half of the nursery fees. Childminders are often cheaper too.