I really don’t mean this to sound like a complaint, or like I don’t realise how lucky I am to actually be pregnant, but I am finding this pregnancy journey very difficult mentally as well as physically.
Since I found out I am pregnant, I have been diagnosed with severe anaemia, high blood pressure and now they are investigating a potential liver complaint. I had zero health issues before I got pregnant and I am really struggling to keep my thoughts positive. I have to see a midwife twice a week because of my blood pressure and now have to factor in weekly blood tests. I feel so guilty that all of these things that are wrong with my body are harming my baby and I feel quite down and tearful a lot of the time.
I know lots of people who would give anything to be in my position and that just makes it worse, knowing that I am not enjoying the experience others crave above anything else.
ive spoken to my midwife about it who said (probably quite rightly) that it’s my hormones and that I’m struggling with being out of control.
I want my baby and I will love it with my whole heart, but I wish someone had told me how hard this whole thing was, then I probably wouldn’t feel so alone.
I know I sound like a terrible, selfish person. I’m just hugely overwhelmed.