Am I taking maternity leave too early?

58 replies

LolaLoo2 · 30/09/2022 15:00

Planning on my last day being 35+2 but using annual leave first, my official maternity leave will start at 37+2.
Struggling with sciatica and SPD this pregnancy.
Having ELCS at 39 weeks.
Second baby (DS 2.5) so plenty to keep me busy.
Taking 52 weeks leave with 3 weeks annual leave on the other end to ensure I cover baby's 1st year.

I get the feeling from my colleagues that they think I'm silly for going off 'so early' and I should be working longer. I know it's not for them to decide or debate but it's bringing my mood down and taking the excitement away.

Is this too early?

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cherrytreelanecherry · 30/09/2022 17:55

barbjones91 · 30/09/2022 17:10

I'm taking mat leave SO early - I'll only be 30 weeks when I go off. The reason for this is that I hate my job. It is so stressful and I'm very unsupported. I wanted to leave earlier on in the year but then found out I was pregnant so stayed, and I've felt stuck ever since. I weighed up all the options and knew that I couldn't concentrate fully on becoming a mum while I was working there and needed a couple of months for myself after a very difficult year. I've been worried over the last few months about how my stress from work has had a negative impact on me and possibly my baby. Lots of people have been telling me it's a mistake but I believe this is the right thing for me. Sending hugs - only you can make the judgment about what you truly need!

This was similar to my situation! It was definitely the right thing to do and I didn’t regret it 😊

Bumply · 30/09/2022 18:08

With ds1 I worked to 38 weeks and he was born 2 days later, so not much rest in the run up.
With ds2 I had a long commute and felt much more tired at an earlier stage so I stopped about 36 weeks (and he was induced a week late).
Do whatever feels right for you.

Scarecrowrowboat · 30/09/2022 18:14

If you're feeling awful then not too early. I wanted to maximise time after baby was born so went at 38 weeks first time but 40 weeks second time but I felt really good so no reason to stop early and especially with my first I was bored out of my mind on mat leave before baby arrived.

Pinkbananas01 · 30/09/2022 18:24

Do what is right for you, doesn't matter what your colleagues think. I started my 1st mat leave at 33 weeks, hadn't planned that but work as nurse was too much being on feet for 12.5hr shifts in critical care & I wasn't well. Meant I went back a bit earlier but with holidays still had nearly a year after baby arrived.

KatRee · 30/09/2022 21:08

I'm starting mine in a week's time when I'll be 33 weeks, 4 days and I can't wait! I'm having a healthy pregnancy so far and wfh 3 days a week with 2 in the office, but the workload has been insane for months, peaking this week and next and I know I need to stop to find the energy, time and headspace to get everything ready for baby's arrival.

It does help that the first 3 weeks I'll technically be on annual leave as have hardly been able to use any for last 6 months, so I know I'll get plenty of time on the other side too.

We just have to do what's right for us and I feel this is very right for me

Candycats · 30/09/2022 21:33

I went off at 35 weeks (used some annual leave before mat leave started) and have absolutely no regrets about it! I was working long shifts on my feet all day in a stressful job that I was fed up of, and I was exhausted in every sense of the word. I loved the time I had off before DS was born and he was late too so I had even more time than planned! I had loads of naps and just lounged around watching TV, but also went for coffee and meals with family and friends. It was great!

Rosegold3112 · 01/10/2022 13:58

Don't let anyone else make you feel guilty or bad for doing what's best for you and your baby!
I went off on maternity so ridiculously early with my first thanks to covid. I worked in a pre-school and would have been 27 weeks when returning back from the Christmas break (right when bloody Boris sent school back for a day and then decided actually it wasn't safe - but kept nurseries open) and was advised that pregnant women should shield from 28 weeks so I opted not to go back but was left with the difficult decision of what to do regarding maternity. I knew I was entitled to be suspended on full pay until I wanted to take maternity but I felt that was taking the p, so opted to go suspended on full pay until 29 weeks which I think is the very earliest you can take leave. I didn't hear a peep from any of my colleagues, bar one. Not even my manager. I was so hurt. But I ended up developing gestational diabetes and found the end of my pregnancy so difficult, I think it was the best decision all round.
Honestly, no one else has to do this apart from you and if you think it will be too hard then don't do it! Your work colleagues might make you feel guilty for doing it, but equally they're not going to actually thank you for staying any longer and they're just being selfish. It might be them one day and I hope they don't feel pressured.

randomlovemore · 01/10/2022 14:28

I would LOVE to go off at that time!! I'm going at 38 weeks, having a ELCS at 39 weeks, but am able to WFH so I won't be on my feet or commuting. Fully prepared to give myself an additional week if things get too hard, but I only get 2 months paid so I'm pushing it as late as I can to maximize salary once baby is here.

For my first child I went off at 36 weeks but was commuting.

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