Inheriting head shape

[somethingonmymind]

This is an unusual one. I guess I’d like to know if anyone has experience of this and also any advice of who to approach about this in the medical profession.

My husband and I would like to try to conceive next year. However, I have always worried about this because I was born with an unusual head shape, which has caused me a lot of self-esteem issues in my life. Although I have thankfully never suffered medically as a result, and facially I’m fine,I would hate for my child to inherit this.

I can find hardly any information out there. All cases to do with unusual head shape seem to afflict babies only and also cause facial abnormalities. I was never diagnosed with anything as a child, and I barely speak about it. This year I had to have an MRI for something unrelated and I mentioned my head shape, but it was dismissed as nothing and I got no answers.

I feel like my GP will fob me off also through lack of knowledge . I wouldn’t not even know who to talk to about this.

Does anyone by any chance have any experience of this?

I don't know about head shape specifically. But I guess when you ttc it's always a gamble which traits your DC will inherit from you both. There are hereditary issues in my family which I hope DC hasn't inherited. But as I can't select embryos before choosing which one to impregnate myself with, I accept it's out of my control. I choose between not having children, and having children but with the risk that they might have the health issue.

Obviously it's on a scale. There are mild cosmetic issues at one end eg balding early, buck teeth, whatever, and I imagine that nobody would consider not having children to avoid this. At the other end there are conditions which seriously affect quality of life. I imagine if screening is unavailable that many people would find this is a more difficult decision to make.

If your head shape is part of a recognised genetic condition which could be screened for as part of IVF, perhaps that would be an option depending on your finances and what country you live in? But if it isn't, then I can't see what can be done about it? You have to choose to either have no children, or have children with the risk they might have your head shape.

It might help to think what they would say to you in twenty years? Assuming they are the same as you, and also suffer with self-esteem, do you think they would prefer that you had decided not to have them at all? Do you wish your parents had chosen not to have you? Has your suffering been this great, or do the good things in your life now make you glad you are alive?

Thank you @Orangio for your kind words. I’ve actually teared up. This is going well!

You're welcome! I hope you can rest easier with this. TTC and pregnancy comes with plenty of stresses, so leaving this one behind would really help.

Was it definitely something that you were actually born with or plagiocephaly, where flat spots develop on a baby’s head due to how they lie? I only ask as plagiocephaly can be treated in babies now.

I think a lot of us have traits we hope our children don’t inherit but remember that medicine has also advanced. I am severely short sighted and I really hope DS doesn’t inherit that. However it is another condition where more can be done about it these days, lenses/glasses/drops to slow progression.