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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Feeling detached from pregnancy.

3 replies

GSD20 · 17/09/2022 06:39

Im 13w with DC3. Very unplanned, we will have 2 under 18 months and financially it will be a worry but I couldn’t go through with an abortion and decided I would just manage.

With pregnancies 1+2 I had severe sickness but still felt really excited regardless. I had bumps/weight gain with both early on, felt very pregnant and couldn’t wait to tell people.

This one is different. I’m not sick at all, I don’t feel pregnant, no bump or weight gain, not even thicker around the pelvis type area. When I saw it on the scan I felt nothing, like I was looking at someone else’s scan rather than mine. I can’t think about it being here as I don’t feel like it will get that far, like there’s no possible way I will have a live baby at the end of this. I keep repeatedly dreaming I’ll have a late miscarriage. I feel like there must be something wrong with it and my body knows.

I haven’t announced this pregnancy, nobody knows other than DH and I…it’s like it doesn’t exist or I don’t want people to know because it’s not going to result in a baby?

This isn’t normal is it? I’m already stuck under a dismissive consultant (same one as last time!) and I definatley don’t want to speak to her about it.

OP posts:
ScienceMummy15 · 17/09/2022 08:45

I felt like this with my second pregnancy which was very much planned and waited for. A few people I spoke to had felt this to some degree with second or third babies and put it down to just being a lot busier. With 2 under 18 months I'm sure you've got a lot on. I kept telling myself it would be better after the scan but it wasn't. I can't remember exactly when I felt the connection because it was a lot more of a slow burn than the first time around. I think I took some time to myself to really picture life with another baby and what they might be like. I know its not easy to find time to yourself. I was worried it was a sign I wouldn't bond with the baby when they were born but it was 100% love at first sight. Maybe try not to take too much from it, I'm sure it will come with time

georgarina · 17/09/2022 19:15

I felt like this with all of my babies. No connection at all until they were born. I used to feel guilty but now I realise it's just how I am and it's fine - I love them when they're here!

And this is dc3 for me as well so I'm just too busy to think about it anyway. I forget all about it and then feel a little kick to remind me!

Telling people will make it feel more real. That's how it is for me. My kids are excited which helps me act excited.

GSD20 · 18/09/2022 05:35

Thank you both of you 🙂
I told a couple of people yesterday, hopefully once it starts moving it feels more real. At the moment it’s like an imaginary thing as I feel so normal!

I can’t imagine myself with 3, but I’m not sure I could imagine myself with 2 either, it’s all a blur!

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