I’m 35 weeks pregnant and a couple of weeks ago I asked my partner to stop drinking over the legal driving limit in the evenings in case I needed to go to hospital. I am consultant led in this pregnancy due to complications with our daughter, who is now 5 so am feeling quite anxious that the same problems will occur. He seemed surprised and kind of joked that I could get an Uber if necessary or that there are family nearby who could help or I could call an ambulance. But he reluctantly agreed and made a few jokey snide comments but did stop for almost a week. Then he said would it be ok if he had one beer a week (he drinks the large bottles that I think are automatically over the limit). I said fine I never asked him to stop just to not go over the driving limit. Since then, so about a week ago, he has had one or two bottles most nights. I don’t know if it’s pregnancy hormones but I’m so incredibly upset and let down by this but I can’t bring myself to talk to him about it as he’s so defensive about things like this. I feel he’s prioritised his need for beer over mine and our baby’s wellbeing and frankly I’m really disappointed and kind of disgusted by him.
I don’t really drink and my parents never really drank so I don’t know if I’m hugely overreacting about his alcohol consumption. His parents on the other hand were alcoholics and he has definitely drunk way too much in the past. At one point about 8 years ago he was getting through a bottle of wine most nights a week which I think is wildly excessive and we had a lot of difficult conversations before he cut down.
Anyway, I’m actually so embarrassed by what I see as his lack of consideration that I can’t talk to friends about it. Am I being a bit nuts or is he being completely out of order?