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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

smoking in pregnancy

16 replies

colette · 05/11/2002 19:19

I am only 6 weeks pg but have "almost" stopped smoking- I am finding it really diffcult . Even tho'I was a v.light smoker 4-5 a day max, it's incredibly hard . I know this sounds really selfish but I actually feel as if I am depriving myself of a treat.
Has anyone any tips to completely knock it on the head ?? Scaring me out of it will be fine!

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bossykate · 05/11/2002 19:41

hi colette, i found giving up smoking one of the hardest things about being pregnant. however, every time i craved a cigarette, i would imagine holding my baby in my arms and forcing him to smoke one - being the equivalent of what i would be doing to him if i smoked when pregnant. i found that thought knocked the cravings on the head quite effectively!

could you perhaps compensate yourself with another treat instead? dark chocolate for example (i recommend green & black's organic variety) is an excellent source of iron, which pregnant women may be short of.

or alternatively have a nice relaxing bath with scented oils and candles?

good luck - quitting is tough even with the best possible motivation.

colette · 05/11/2002 20:39

Thanks
I try and tell myself if I don't stop now I never will and I hate to see someone pushing a buggy fagging it. (even of course I understand having kids may make you want to smoke more)
Just a few days of complete abstinence should cut the craving - I hope.
Thanks for your support

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WideWebWitch · 05/11/2002 20:41

Colette, not pregnant but telling myself I will give up any day. Am intending to re-read Allen Carr's Easy Way to Stop Smoking, it worked for me when I was pregant with ds. Good luck, I do understand how hard it is.

pupuce · 05/11/2002 21:00

Colette - I have just been to a midwives smoking cessation seminar... (I am not a MW but a doula)... First I'd say ring the NHS helpline as they really have good stuff to tell you... I only have my local number but I am sure they can tell you where to ring
01622.723836 (this is the pregnancy line for smokers...)
Second of all they kept telling us that we shoudl not push you into a "stop smoking" corner as it doesn't work but they have info/suggestions, etc that you might find really helpful.
They said it takes 3 weeks minimum to get the addiction (at least the accute bit) out of your system so slowly cutting doen doesn't work ! But maybe it does for you.

Why don't you ring them, you seem keen to do something about it !
Let us know how you get on !

music · 05/11/2002 21:52

Very hard Colette. I was really lucky as I got pregnant more or less just after I gave up. First of all, don't think too harshly of yourself for wanting to smoke still because you're still an individual with your own needs and problems, not just a pregnant woman.

Every time you manage to go without you should praise yourself, and every time you give in at least know that you tried.

Maybe take up yoga(with instructor trained to teach pregnant women)to learn other methods of stress management

I saw on a program once somebody suggested taking small sips of water through a straw every time the craving happened, I didn't do this, but took up chewing gum instead--orbit sweet mint, wriggleys extra, airwaves,...........totally obsessed myself with it, keep it in pockets, in my bag, all over the house,(still do) quite funny really!

maybe think about the things that seem to make you want to smoke: see if you can focus on them directly, and find other ways round them. Have no fear, if you really want to do this you will.

Repeat to yourself every day 'I am a good person'
followed by three positive things about you.

Don't worry too much, there are far worse things you could be doing. Just try try try, that's the best anyone can do in this life, and that's hard enough as it is!

Ghosty · 06/11/2002 06:28

colette - I really sympathise with you ... when I got pg with DS I gave up the day after I did the test ... I don't know how I did but I did and it was great ...
Unfortunately DH didn't give up and so by the time DS was 5 months (I was no longer BF) I was smoking again ... although never around DS, only when he was in bed asleep.
By the time DS was two however, although we never ever smoked in the house, I would always smoke in the garden when he was watching the tellytubbies and Bob the Builder!
Anyway ... I will get to the point eventually ... I assumed that when I got pg a second time I would give up easily again ...WRONG!
I just couldn't do it ... and after doing the test I tried to pretend that I wasn't pg and and it didn't count because I hadn't seen a doctor yet etc ... Anyway I have now finally managed to go without for 2 weeks and I am really pleased but I was still sneaking outside when DH went to work at 9 weeks (my morning sickness made not difference)
What finally worked for me was that I saw this cartoon picture of a pregnant woman smoking and you could see into her tummy ... the umbilical cord was grey and the baby inside was blue in the face and coughing with a thought bubble coming out saying 'Please mummy ... for me?' It really made me think and I have done it but it was REALLY HARD!
Whenever I want a ciggie I do something with my hands ... phone a friend ... do a puzzle with DS ... do some housework (yuk!) ... pluck my eyebrows (ouch!) ... paint my toenails ... write a letter or an email ... get onto mumsnet!

Happily DH has also gone for 2 weeks without a fag and our plan is to NOT start again after this one comes ...

Sorry to go on but I hope this helps a bit ...

SueDonim · 06/11/2002 08:48

Good luck, Colette, in giving up smoking. As a non-smoker I'm approaching the subject from a different direction. My mum (and dad, but he wasn't around so much) was a smoker and I loathed it, even as a small child. I often had bad throats and bronchitis (because my parents smoked - who knows??) and the smoke made me feel even worse. I can still recall the effect 30 yrs on, of my mum lighting up, as my throat constricted and affected my breathing, and it isn't nice.

Yet after being a smoker for 40+ yrs mum gave up about 12 yrs ago, with no real problem, after one of my children told her she didn't smell nice (even though by then she smoked outdoors, you could still smell it on her breath and clothes) and they were worried she was going to die soon. The wheezy cough she had had for as long as I can remember even disappeared! Maybe seeing it from your baby's POV and wanting to be around to see your baby grow up will give you the incentive to kick the habit. And then you can join my mum in being an ardent anti-smoking nazi, lol!

Ghosty · 06/11/2002 10:13

SueDonim ... what you say about 'smelling nice' or not is so true! The couple of times that my DH has come home smelling of fags since I stopped made me think how I must have smelled to my DS ... not nice! I also do not want my DS to 'remember' me smoking ...

colette · 06/11/2002 10:46

I am really grateful for the advice and support as it is not something that is talked openly about ( and this increases the guilt)Ghosty I laughed at your comments as I haven't yet been to the drs so I think I am somewhat in denial too! I gave up just before I had ds so that was easier. I think because I was only smoking 4 or 5 in the eve. and no-one at work thinks I smoke I am shocked at how difficult it is.
DH smokes still- he gave up when I was pg with ds but went thro' a period of depression due to a no of factors but mostly having tinnitus ( which he still has, but has come to terms with) this makes him associate giving up with this bad time. I think he will, but to succeed he has to make the decision.
I am buying Allen Carrs book and I will phone up the helpline no.I wish I could have a scan now and see the baby and it would make it more real (I know it would look like a prawn)Thanks again for all your support it really makes a difference!

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mears · 06/11/2002 10:50

Do speak to your midwife. There is a lot of info out there to help pregnant women stop smoking as it is high on the government agenda.

Bumblelion · 06/11/2002 11:46

Colette, I do sympathise with you as I smoked whilst pregnant with my third child. I had given up smoking for 9 years and in that time had my first two children. When I became pregnant with third baby (she is now 1 year old) I had started smoking again about 12 months before and always thought when that pregnancy test came back positive I would be able to stop. Needless to stay I smoked all through the pregnancy and am still smoking now. Have tried to stop but went through horrible time with husband when pregnant and we are now separated and I have had so much stress going on in my life in the last year or so that I can't find the inner strength to stop. Even husband telling me things whilst pregnant like "just because that baby is not running down your legs", i.e. just because you are not miscarrying, doesn't mean that everything is okay. (He really used to say horrible, nasty things).

My DD2 is now 1 and not walking and also failed her 8 month development check (although after subsequent hospital visits they are not too concerned - just basically a lazy baby). She also has synostosis where the plates in the brain fuse too early but her brain is not affected (had scans, etc.) although she is still being referred to Great Ormond Street Hospital as a precaution. My HV has reassured me that none of what my DD2 is going through (delayed development, synostosis, etc.) was caused by my smoking (my HV is/was very concerned about me and my situation at home and understands why I am finding it so hard to stop smoking, also my mum - my greatest friend - had a nervous breakdown at the beginning of the year).

I am not agreeing to you smoking but, at the end of the day, only you can do it for yourself and I know how you feel.

colette · 06/11/2002 19:36

Bumblelion
I am sorry to hear about your worrying time with your daughter . I hope it all turns out o.k 'sometimes it feels as if everything goes wrong all at once. It sounds as if you've got a good hv.
Everysmoker has a time (or almost every)when they really feel is the right time to stop - I feel if I don't stop now I'll be smoking when I'm on a pension!! And the cost is incredible

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Lindy · 06/11/2002 22:50

Bumblion - you know this really but do not even think that smoking could have caused the synostosis in your DD, no more than my drinking habits caused it in my DS - 1) no cause has been established 2) any slight cause is due to genetics not mothers' habits.

I am sure the world would be a better place (?) if none of smoked, drank, ate more than 1800 calories a day, exercised regularly, had harmonious relationships with everyone etc etc - don't you all get fed up with all this political correctness?

I am sure you are doing what you can to cut down smoking; my MIL smoked 60++ a day whilst pregnant (& B/feeding)& her two children are still hearty & healthy (non-smokers) in their mid 40s - don't ask about MIL but that was her choice!!

jessi · 07/11/2002 19:35

Hi Colette
Just wanted to say I am also 6 weeks and have given up recently,too! If you want we could meet here to grizzle and celebrate our achievements! I called the NHS Pregnancy Quitline today out of interest, apparantly you can get patches but as I didn't smoke very much before I quit, they wouldn't be any good for me. Also there is a pill you can take, if you are in the middle of an intense craving, you just let this pill dissolve in your mouth and apprantly that helps.
I am having a satsuma every time I want a roll-up. My main problem though is my temper... I'm sure its the hormones plus lack of alcohol and nicotine but I'm abit frazzled.. NHS guy's advice was have a big glass of water whenever you get stressed. He said water is very calming and also obviously good for you too!
Anyway, whats your due date? Mine is 1st July.. good luck.
Jessi

colette · 07/11/2002 22:02

Jesi
I've just posted and its disappeared!! Congrats for non smoking and being pg . I will phone the nhs helpline - so busy these last few days . I only had half a rollie yesterday but I know thats keeping up the addiction . I think I'm due july 4th but I haven't been to the drs yet (next week)I think I am moodier but I wasn't sure if that was my hormones ( seems a bit early )
Keep well

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jessi · 08/11/2002 09:19

Hi Colette
You've done so well, only half a rollie!! I am really hoping it is the pregnancy hormones and not just the stopping smoking thats making me a rat-bag! I must confess that I didn't tell my doc when I saw her that I smoked, I knew I was going to give up so didn't bother talking about it. However, from talking to the NHS line, there evidently are things you can have to help which suprised me. My dh has given up with patches, and he isn't ratty at all, the helpline man said patches take away the grumpiness! Take care, Jessi

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