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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Advice needed - second time birth!

1 reply

LASandOtto · 01/09/2022 09:28

Hi all,

I would really appreciate some advice, I know ultimately this is my decision but hearing experiences from others, whilst anecdotal, is very helpful.

Due with second baby on 15/09.

My first was born 2 years ago at 41+5. I had awful contractions for 2 days at home, kept being sent home from hospital as not dilated sufficiently, went through a couple of sweeps. Finally got admitted Saturday, at this point it appeared I had an infection, and there was meconium in the waters when they broke my waters and put me on the syntocin (spelling?) drip. Thankfully I had an epidural. Baby was born at 1am Sunday morning and was not very responsive, emergency team crashed in and baby was taken to NICU where she stayed 1 week. Grateful she's all ok today, but it was a terrifying experience. My recovery was a blur because I was to focused on my baby in NICU but I had a second degree tear stitched up and was ok after a couple of weeks.

I've been very unsure about what to do this time round. I've had a review of my birth experience with a senior midwife which was helpful. No one can make any guarantees but the assumption is that second time deliveries are less problematic. What happened with my first birth was, according to them, 'bad luck'.

Here's my conundrum: my toddler will have to be looked after by someone and as we don't have family close by, my sister is flying in next week so she's around from when I'm 39 weeks onwards. The other option is if something were to happen before then, my MIL and FIL are 3 hours away and would come down. This isn't my preferred option as my MIL and I don't have a great relationship. They've never looked after my toddler alone, they visit every few months for a couple of days but that's it. My toddler does go to nursery 4 days a week as well (full days) so if anything were to happen during the day she'd be ok there for at least a while.

I have already expressed I don't want to go overdue again, I have a real fear of history repeating itself. I've swayed been asking for an elective section (but have been discouraged) or asking for an induction before 40 weeks, which they have said we can discuss at my next appointment (Friday this week).

What have other mums in such situations done? I don't know whether to opt for an elective section, which has risks of course, or induction and hopefully a vaginal birth? I just feel I need some sort of plan, even if it doesn't all happen was expected, to give me some reassurance.

Thanks for reading!

OP posts:
Dogtooth · 01/09/2022 09:36

I had a hard first birth, second time I was worried like you are but it was much faster and easier, done within three hours of getting to hospital (first birth was three days then c-section).

Your toddler will be fine with in laws or your sister. They can stick her in front of the telly, it'll be fine.

See if they'll book you in for induction or C-section at 41 weeks, to put an end date on things, if it would put your mind at rest.

Good luck!

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