Unwanted 3rd pregnancy

[Namechange07]

Hi, I'm sorry if this is long but I want to try and included everything. Also named changed as there are a few people on her I know IRL (hence the rubbish username).

So I've just found out I'm pregnant with 3rd baby. I feel absolutely sick writing and thinking this but I do not want it.

I have 2 DS', Ds1 just turned 4 and Ds2 almost 2. DH and I fought long and hard to have our gorgeous boys and had multiple heartbreaks along the way. I always saw myself with 3 but after going through a tough battle to get pregnant, followed by 2 awful pregnancys and a really tough time with Ds2 as well as postnatal depression with both I feel happy and content with my lovely LOs.

Here's where both DH and I are in shock. We use protection always and have not had any medical intervention (as with previous 2). I'm dumbfounded and confused as to how this has happened (well obviously I know how but you get what I mean!)

I don't know what to do, I really don't want another, DH would love another (he's from a large family) but ultimately agrees that this is bad timing. We have just come out the other end of a very stressful couple years which nearly broke us and I just cant wrap my head around any of it.

Our family don't know and I don't know if I can bring myself to say anything.

I don't know what I'm asking, maybe if anybody has been in a similar situation what did you decide?

TIA

I'm sorry you're in this situation.

It's ok to not want any more children. It's ok to prioritise the kids you have and your relationship. It's ok to not continue with this pregnancy.

Hi , I know exactly how you feel. This was me I'm 2020, suddenly pregnant with my third. I couldn't bring myself to get rid of it so went ahead with it, I can't pretend their haven't been some tough time but she is 14 months now and I'm so glad I have her. I really hope it works out for you whatever you chose x

Thank you both for your replies and taking the time to read my ramblings. 😊
@MenonC thank you for sharing your experience.

This was me but with #2 when I found out I was pregnant when DD was tiny. I couldn’t bear the thought of putting my mind and body through that again when I was only just starting to feel back to normal. I terminated and didn’t regret it BUT before I did I had to do some soul searching and check with myself that I wouldn’t regret it if I was unable to ever fall pregnant again.

Hope you’re ok, that’s really bad luck and I know how difficult a situation it is.

Sorry than you're going through a tricky time.

I was in a similar position and terminated at 7 weeks. It was a difficult decision but if I'm honest, two years on and I never really think about it. We would have really struggled to have time / money / energy for another and ultimately I'm thankful a safe termination was an option. I feel no guilt because I wouldn't have been a good enough mum to my existing two.

Hope you manage to find your way.

Oh OP, I’m so sorry you’re going through this. I was in this exact position a few months ago. We decided almost immediately to terminate the pregnancy. There were several delays to terminate which made it harder emotionally: I had to have a scan to check it wasn’t ectopic, then it seemed to take forever for the consultation and following appts. I was booked in for the surgical procedure and a few days before, I started to get cold feet. After an entire weekend of discussion I cancelled it the morning of and self referred myself to the midwife team. I’m now almost 14 weeks pregnant and we have no regrets. I felt like it was one of the hardest decisions I have ever had to make - it certainly felt like the weight of it was ripping me apart at times. And this comes from someone who was certain a termination was the right decision. Whatever you decide will be the best thing for you and your family. Sending love x