Pregnant and in a panic.

[Ithinkimightbebroken]

Oh god. I’ve just discovered I’m pregnant again.I just need to vent if anyone is there to listen.

I have 2 other DC. One is 8 months old.
I have no idea how far along I am. Possibly conceived sometime in May although who knows when as I’ve had problems with bleeding intermittently since the birth of DC2. I’ve no idea when my last period was. We’ve barely had sex but did use condoms the few times we did (many 3 times in 3 months if that!). I’ve no idea when it happened, literally not a clue. I’m not on contraception because I had a breast cancer scare and didn’t want the hormones.

My work is going to kill me, I’ve only been back a couple of weeks and I don’t have the sort of job I can do properly while pregnant. Last time I was signed off early.
In my last pregnancy I wasn’t listened too at all. I had growth scans showing the baby was 95th centile. Nobody cared. I begged for induction but they wouldn’t consider it. I went really overdue because they couldn’t get me in and had a horrible birth with her getting stuck resulting in a prolapse. It’s under control but I’m terrified this is the end and I’ll end up incontinent or god knows what.
I had horrible pregnancies, constant vomiting, anaemia, heart palpitations throughout both times. DC2 still does not sleep.

My DH is supportive but works long hours. I’m on my own. I’ll have 2 under 2 plus one at primary school 😬😬 Oh and 3 dogs and a cat while also trying to hold onto my job by the skin of my teeth.
Add to this I started a masters degree with the open university before I found out I was pregnant with DC2 (I didn’t think I could get pregnant again as it wasn’t happening hence massive age gap!) I managed to defer while pregnant and have just started it back up again. I was really enjoying it but I’m not sure I’ll be allowed to defer again. I really wanted to further my career and now it’s going to be dead.

Im also worried there will be something wrong with this baby. I’ve worked with dangerous chemicals, drank, haven’t eaten well. Are there more risks with close together pregnancies?

Im sorry if this offends anyone TTC, I feel so fucking stupid.

Has anyone else been in a similar situation. I feel a bit like my life is over 🙁

Oh op, it is normal to feel overwhelmed. But the most important thing to remember is that you are not Commited to any course of action, you have options open to you.

I suppose the first thing to figure out is if you actually want to be pregnant?

Don't worry about the course, the OU are very understanding and it took me 16 years to get a BA through them.

I think you need to get a dating scan to see how far you are asap?

16 years! That makes me feel so much better. I’m on module 4 of 24 so a long way to go.

I didn’t want another baby. I don’t know if I could go through with a termination though, I’m not anti abortion but it feels wrong to think about it. I don’t know, my heads allover the place. I’m not a natural mother, I love my DC but I do find it hard. DH is a better parent than me.

I will ring the doctors tomorrow, if the daring scan is 12 weeks how will I know when it needs to be booked for? At a guess the sex was in May sometime but I have no idea when. I would hazard a guess I'm about 8 weeks based on the strength of symptoms I had last time. Will I have to pay for a private dating scan?

The test is certainly not a squinter that’s for sure…

Hugs and best wishes for whatever you decide.

No point ringing the gp. Ring Bupas who will give you advice and help you decide either way.

GP practices no longer get involved with pregnancy

Thankyou @RuthW for the support.

Ive booked a dating scan for this afternoon. I’m hoping it’s still early so I have time to make a decision.

Sorry I know this thread is from July, how did everything go op??

Hi @Smashingpumpkinsatchristmas,

Im currently 30 weeks pregnant! Work was fine about it, I’m still powering through as much of the degree as I can but I will probably have to stop once baby comes.

I still don’t feel great about it, if I’m honest, but better than I did at least. Its Measuring up to be another big baby but I’m under a consultant so hoping for the least birth trauma possible 😬

Are you in a similar boat?

Hey OP, just came across this thread. I’m glad to hear you’re feeling better about things! Do you think that having an elcs would make you feel more confident about the birth? Either that or asking to be induced a week or two early? Definitely push for whatever you feel most comfortable with and don’t back down, it’s so frustrating not being listened to. I also think having DH fight your corner helps too. So if he could come to some of your appointments with you it might help.

Im not really in a similar position, but am 37 weeks with DC2 and nervous about the birth. My first baby was actually really small but still left me with stress incontinence and beginnings of a prolapse so I am worried about how much worse things will get!

@Ithinkimightbebroken absolutely firmly demand a C section if you feel that would be safer for you and baby
It's your right and they have to facilitate it eventually.