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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Distant fiancé at 5 weeks pregnant

1 reply

hanibani · 28/07/2022 10:53

Hi everyone,

I just wanted to get some advice since I’m feeling really down and lonely.

4 months ago I became pregnant for the first time - it was a surprise for my fiancé and I and I ended up having a MC at 7 weeks.

Some background knowledge. My fiancé’s sister who he is very close to lost two babies due to an incompetent cervix. She is now pregnant at 7 months and fingers crossed all will go well since she now has had the stitching done. Needless to say he’s been so worried about her (as well have I). She’s lovely and has been through hell poor thing.

We decided to try for a baby. It was a bit stressful because we had a time limit due to our wedding next year. We managed on the last window of opportunity and I am now 5 weeks pregnant.

Weirdly I feel dreadful. I have quite strong early symptoms. We are also moving into our first home this week and although it should all be happy - my fiancé seems so very unhappy.

He hardly smiles, hasn’t been excited. Is cold and moody. I feel like I’m walking on eggshells and am terribly lonely. I can’t talk to anyone about how I feel and when I try to tell him how exhausted I feel or unwell he acts like it’s nothing or I’m exaggerating. I feel very teary because what should be a happy time in my life (pregnant again, getting married, moving into our first home) feels utterly miserable. I try to ask him if he’s excited (about the move not about baby) and he can’t even crack a smile.

Of course I understand life is also stressful, moving and such takes a lot - but I’m really down because I’m still feeling emotional about my MC and naturally am scared. I just wish I had a little more positivity and support. I also feel like my emotions are all over the place but I’m trying hard not to show it. Just really feeling on my lonesome.

Does anyone have any advice? Thank you ladies.

OP posts:
Merryclaire · 28/07/2022 17:03

Sorry that you’re going through this. Moving house is very stressful and some people cope with it by turning it all inwards, which can make them seem very moody and quiet.

You also have a lot going on being pregnant and planning a wedding. So it may be that the gravity of everything is hitting him.

Unfortunately not all men are capable of being a rock for us, and can struggle with their own stress and emotions.

Pregnancy can be an emotional, vulnerable time, so be careful of looking for issues that aren’t there.

However, if you really feel like he’s changed in the way he feels about you then you do need to address it now. Try to find a quiet, uninterrupted time to talk openly and tell him how you’re feeling - without making accusations. See what he has to say.

Hopefully he’ll be willing to listen, reassure you, and offer more support going forward. If it raises bigger issues, then at least it’s out in the open.

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