Weight gain - hormones - low self esteem

[Lunar88]

I’m really struggling with how my body is changing with pregnancy. Currently 22 weeks and I just feel everything has ‘exploded’. My thighs are full of cellulite they chafe and wiggle at any slight movement, my arms look like prices of ham, my breasts are huge and so heavy, my back is wide and I’ve seen rolls I never knew existed…
I previously competed in bikini body building and have worked so hard to keep a petite figure as I was heavily bullied and suffered with body image issues my whole life. The changes I am seeing are taking me back to that person I once was - in which I was very miserable, lacked any self confidence, and just wanted to hide away from the world. I feel like that person again… I just don’t feel like me anymore… I don’t recognise myself in body and mind… and then I beat myself up cause I feel so shallow - what’s important is the baby… but I can’t enjoy any of it cause I’m just so upset and depressed about how I am feeling and looking.
i know it’s effecting my partner now too… we don’t have sec cause I can’t stand for him to look at me or touch me - I am not the woman he first met and I feel like I’ve totally lost myself.
i don’t know if anyone has felt like this or can help support me through these feelings and body changes? But I just don’t know how to cope… I just don’t want to be around anyone cause I’m so embarrassed over how I look and how I’m feeling once again :(

Hello lovely - no advice but I'm 32 weeks tomorrow and I just wanted to say I completely get this (especially on the thighs front!). The only places I don't feel have exploded (yet) are my ankles, feet, wrists and hands but everything else is unrecognisable. I'd lost ~12 stone and would've liked another 1.5 off but fell pregnant before losing the last bit. It's been SO difficult putting weight back on and I've also had to scale the gym back the last month or so and I feel like an absolute slug.

I keep reminding myself it's not permanent and what matters is my body doing everything it needs to do to make sure she gets here happy and healthy, and I've had the weight off once and I can do it again, but it doesn't stop the flip side scary thoughts of 'I've got another 8 weeks and more weight to add on'.

Really hope you're okay and just know you're amazing - you're growing a little human who will very soon be here for you to cuddle x