When did you tell your children you was pregnant?

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What stage of pregnancy and how did you tell your children you was pregnant?

And what were their reactions to your news?

I am pregnant with a new partner and worried about their reaction to the news. They both get along extremely well with new partner however he has only been in their life around a year. This pregnancy was not planned and I am so nervous to tell them!

How old are they?

DD is 10 and my DS is almost 7. They have been through a lot of changes in the past few years with me and their dad splitting. My worry is they have only just settled into the routine of going back and fourth between my and their dads and I feel so guilty changing something else in their lives again.

Does your partner live with you?

Not currently but we have plans to move to a larger house together. The children know of this and are happy about it.

Eesh. That's going to be a lot of change all at once, new house, new man living with them, new baby taking up all your time - what's your relationship like with their dad? Can you tell him first so he can support them alongside you? They'll probably be excited to start with and then when it sinks in a bit you might find they show some signs of being a bit upset or anxious about it. I would make sure you make it clear to them that you accept all their feelings and want to hear whatever they're thinking or feeling about it. Your 10yr old in particular is old enough to feel guilty for feeling bad about it, so I'd make sure you give her space to have all of her feelings acknowledged, not just the positive ones.

Told my step kids (11 and 8) after our 12 week scan as I started showing and we wanted them to share in the excitement. They were delighted but I did worry about their reactions and whether they'd feel worried about losing their dads attention. That may still happen but for now they are so pleased to know :-)

I totally agree it is a massive amount of change. I am very open and honest with my children and because of this we share a great relationship. My DD especially is quite sensitive but I always encourage her to talk about how she is feeling, the good and the bad feelings. I agree they will have mixed emotions and I just want to make sure I do it right so that they can process things however they feel comfortable.

Me and their dad have a good relationship albeit mainly from my end. Unfortunately I feel he is still very much hung up on our past relationship (I feel this for various reasons), therefore he tends to make things difficult at times. This is why I am also very worried about telling him as I know he will make things harder for me out of bitterness. I doubt very much he will be supportive.

I am so glad to hear they are excited about your news! I fear that my kids have just had so much change and I just want to make sure I approach it in the best way for them!

I’m obviously older now but was once your DD. I knew before my mum had even told me and did not like my step dad at the time. All I can say is be open and honest (which it sounds like you are). I’m not going to lie I was horrible and had some confusing emotions not even I could understand but my mum and step dad kept us involved as much as possible, shopping names etc (suitable to our age) and then we grew to accept the change.

i can also remember refusing to share my room and we moved to somewhere bigger too.

I would wait for 12week scan

Hi,
I'm new to Mumsnet so I'm not sure if I'm doing this right lol but I'm looking for advice. I recently got back in touch with an ex who I had been seeing casually on and off for the past 5 years. I found out 2 years ago he was living with another woman and she was pregnant, I cut ties with him when I found this out. However I started talking to him again and he is no longer with the woman so I agreed to meet with him and all the feelings came back. Anyway I'm now 8w4d pregnant with his child. He has said he will be there for me but we're not officially in a relationship and I'm not feeling very supported by him tbh. He has 4 children to 3 different women 2 who live with him full time and don't see their mums and the other 2 live with their mum. I have 3 boys who are 14,12 and 11 and they live with me full time and have no contact with their dad. My children don't particularly like the man I'm pregnant with and I feel like I've got myself into a really sticky situation. I'm so worried about how they will react. Has anyone been in a similar situation to this? If so when did you tell your children about the pregnancy and how did you all cope? I know this is along post but I hope it makes sense, my mind is all over the place.