Poor mental health during pregnancy.. help please

[Luciaray]

I found out I was pregnant with my (planned) second baby a couple of months ago and since then my mental health has been horrendous. I was suffered badly with poor mental health since I was little however the last few years have been fantastic, I have felt more free than I have ever felt and truly have been happier than ever. I suffered with my mental health during my first pregnancy but thought that was just due to where I (we) were in life and that it was unplanned etc. Due to my mental health during my first pregnancy my marriage suffered a lot and I can see it’s all happening again and everything I’ve worked so hard for is unravelling. I don’t understand why the hormones affect me so much and make me so incredibly miserable and unbearable to be around. I very much want a second child but I’m really questioning if I can handle pregnancy again and wondering if it is best to terminate. I’m so worried about it affecting my marriage, my daughter and my work.

Are you getting any support? Some people I think will always find pregnancy hard. There are medications it is safe to take in pregnancy and there are specialist mental health services.

Is your husband being supportive of you? Pregnancy is hard and he needs to help you it is not your responsibility to make your symptoms less so he is less effected.

Please get in touch with your Gp or midwife and tell them how you are feeling. I also suffer poor mental health and as my Gp is very aware of this got me all the help early on in my pregnancy just incase. I feel much more supported in my ability to get through this with having the support in place should I need it. You need to be open with them so they can help you. They have mental health midwife’s, you can be referred to the perinatal mental health team, your Gp can keep a closer eye on you or prescribe antidepressants safe to take in pregnancy, all of these things could help you. Personally I don’t always rate mental health but knowing I have the support should I need it to call has helped me feel like I’m not so alone. It doesn’t sound like you want to terminate, it sounds like you just don’t want to be feeling how you are feeling. Please reach out for help first. Here if u need to chat x

Hi, i'm so sorry you have worries about this again, the fear of what might be is itself very stressful.

But do remember, this time things are a little different. You've had a pregnancy before so you know that there is the potential for hormones to knock you off balance, and you'll be able to see it coming and help yourself better than last time. That makes a huge difference

Remember that you are not your thoughts, that pregnancy is quite an extreme experience for our body and mind and that it is only for a finite time of a few months. This is not forever.

Do you have a talking therapist? As previous poster mentioned, a GP should prioritise you but if you want to take things into your own hands, a lot of areas have therapists who provide low-cost support on a self-referral basis. You'll just need to do a little googling and send some emails, and someone will point you in the right direction.

A friend of mine who has mental health issues was supported brilliantly by her GP, who continued to provide her medication throughout her pregnancy, which kept things stable for her. So medication might be a possibility too.

Half the battle is identifying you might have problems and openly seeking help, so you are doing really well x