Anxiety over exes in laws

[Calbooo]

Hey, I’m just interested what others may think of my story as my anxiety and confidence is lacking.

I was with my daughters father for 7 years before he had a life changing accident 4 years ago. Our daughter was 3 at the time. He had life changing injuries and is in 24 hour care in his own flat. We go to see him once a week and my daughter stays with his mum once a month on a weekend. Our relationship before the accident was toxic but I have put that all under the carpet to be there for him.

now during the time of him being in hospital for a year & half his family more so sister would try & control situations which was out of our hands. During the 4 years I have had abusive messages about different things & when she found out I was seeing someone a year later I got called all names under the sun. My anxiety has been so bad over the last 4 years that I’m now doing counselling.

I am now currently pregnant 17+ with the partner I have been with. I haven’t told my daughter or many people as I have had late miscarriages in the past year. Im so nervous about telling my daughters dads side of the family. I also feel like have I complicated things as I don’t know how Xmas and holidays would work out. My anxiety is all over the place and keep thinking bad things. Im sure my daughter dad will be happy for me as I have bought a few things up in the past.

Has anyone had another baby with a another partner and felt anxious and had drama with there exes family. I’m just trying to get my thoughts around it all.

Congratulations and I hope your pregnancy goes smoothly.
They have no say in your relationships now and if he hasn't of had the accident then you wouldn't be visiting him once a week after separating so they should be grateful you have continued to do this for your dd. I'd maybe consider telling them after your 20w scan so you're not continuing to worry plus it'll be hard to hide it by then anyway. As devastating as the accident and changes must have been for your ex and his family, they can't expect you to not move on. Your life has changed too, you are now parenting dd alone (as in dad can't help) other than a break once a month.

@Flamingle18 thank you for your response. I defo won’t be telling them still after my scan and not sure if I have the guts to tell them. I really do hope they can be there for me like I have been there and still want to. I already feel like Iv complicated things but I hope it will all work out.

Hi OP! Congratulations 🥰🥰 maybe I'm a bit harsh, but I don't see why you need to tell them at all. They are not respectful of you or to you. This baby is nothing to do with them, if your daughter brings it up and they find out then great. They have no right to ask any questions and you are in no way obliged to tell them anything you don't want to. You are entitled to move on with your life, and I totally get why you would have anxiety. This is your life OP, don't let them ruin your happiness xx

@hellobeautifulsoul hello thank you for your reply. A few people have said the same but I just feel like I would need to. I just hope that it’s all in my head & they will be understanding but they have never done so. I would never not go and see my daughters father as I want him to be apart of my life and my daughters. Im always thinking the worse. But thank u I will definitely try and be stronger and not care what they say.