Lonliness in unplanned pregnancy causing anxiety

[Insecuremum]

Hi mumsnet,
This is my first post. I've recently found out I am pregnant. It is unplanned but both me and my new partner are happy to become parents together.
However I am overwhelmed by a sense of loneliness. I don't know how to make myself feel better.
It is the sense that my partner is free to continue his life as normal. Whereas I am tired and cannot go out and drink with friends like normal (as nobody knows yet). And drinking is off the cards for a while now. It seems going out for a drink was my main form of socialising (without me even consciously realising it).

If I feel like this already, how am I going to survive the whole pregnancy and even beyond.

Thanks all,

I am pregnant too, and to be honest I'm so tired I don't even have the energy to socialize. Personally I think, alcohol being your only form of socialising is unhealthy although i know its not uncommon in UK. I say this as someone who struggled with relying on alcohol for social situations (not saying you do)

It can feel awkward at first, feels less comfortable or less fun. I avoided socialising due to it and certainly that is where the loneliness comes in.

Definitely make a effort to go and socialize without alcohol, you'll feel better for it than isolating yourself away. Try to find other things to do other than bars etc , if you think people will query why your not drinking.

I personally find its better to DO something rather than go to a bar etc as usually the social battery goes after 1-2 hours sober whereas drinking folks can talk for hours+ . Plus it takes away the attention that your nor drinking!

But certainly don't lock yourself away just because you can't drink- you will feel lonely that way. Get out & socialize in some way or the other.

I am in first trimester (10.5 weeks) and feel terrible, but the tiredness etc will go eventually and maybe then you'll feel more like socialising!

Well he isn’t going to be free to continue his life as normal for long..

I don’t know how pregnant you are OP, but it might be worth having a think about whether this is what you want. It’s a hugely dramatic life change and you both really need to be up for that.

I craved a glass of wine for about two weeks post positive test and even felt annoyed when my DH sat there enjoying his weekend wine when I couldn’t have any…then the sickness and tiredness kicked in and it was the last thing I wanted! Now in the second trimester, the sickness has gone by I no longer crave that glass of wine. I do socialise and enjoy it, its good for me to chat to friends and get out and about, but I think your protective instinct kicks in and takes the craving away 🤷🏻‍♀️