36 week anxiety sky high

[Becca.200622]

I'm currently 36 weeks pregnant and my anxiety is through the roof....I'm so worried about things going wrong or something happening to my baby.

She was a planned pregnancy. Really lucky to conceive straight away. Between 6-8 weeks I had quite a lot of bleeding, I went to EGU who then booked me a scan the following week - she was fine and the bleeding was down to a cervical ectropion. It eventually subsided.

12 week scan was absolutely fine, so I thought we were safe. I then caught covid at 16 weeks, luckily didn't need admitted but spent the whole time crying. My partner who is not jabbed had virtually no symptoms, I on the other hand with all my jabs must've had every symptom known to man plus perhaps a few more. The coughing was making me throw up, pee myself, my hearing went in one ear? Just awful. At the 20 week scan (covid clear) she wouldn't get into the correct position so was rebooked for 22 weeks. At that scan I was alone, as parking at hospital was rubbish, partner couldn't get the time off and my my mum had to wait in the car.

I went in alone, and at the scan the lady asked someone to come in for a second opinion. They informed me that my baby has fluid around her heart and would need to be referred to FMU. It was a small pericardial effusion measuring 2.5mm and the expected range is up to 2. Told me it was probably nothing to worry about and someone would be in touch. I've walked into the waiting room and just broke down.

Got home eventually got a call with an appointment the following week. Was told again it was nothing to worry about but it was as a precaution.

Went to the scan after a really difficult week, and it had increased to 3.6mm and I was going to be referred to Great Ormond Street Hospital. And I was to wait to be contacted.

GOSH contacted me on the same day and booked me an appointment the following week. They were brilliant the lady said the fluid was there but she wasn't too concerned as the rest of the structure or her heart was fine and there was no fluid anywhere else.

This was obviously great news, but it had been at the back of my mind throughout. I just felt if it's not meant to be there why is it there - was it from covid, was it from the vaccine, I had major problems at work were HR had got involved and a huge investigation was taking place. Was it stress. Did I eat something? Just a million things.

Had a scan again at 34 weeks - it had completely disappeared and resolved itself! Best news ever - I think I could've actually taken off and flown home from the hospital.

So what the hell is wrong with me? I'm just so anxious about something going wrong - and then I think the stress won't be doing her any good - then I get stressed about being stressed 😩

Sounds like you've had a really tough time during pregnancy, it's no wonder you are feeling anxious and stressed. I was very anxious through pregnancy, especially the second time round. It helped me to sign up to the Positive Birthing Company online hypnobirthing course. Might be worth a look, the course is presented through videos and there are lots of strategies to make you feel calmer about everything - very educational but not in a daunting way. It is also important to reassure yourself that it is completely normal to be anxious in pregnancy - especially with the journey you've had. I really worried about the impact that being anxious would have on my little ones but honestly both have been super chilled and healthy. I know it's easier said than done sometimes but self care needs to be the number one priority right now - the hypnobirthing course is good for suggesting activities to relax and release those endorphins. Good luck with everything, you've got this 💪 x

Oh OP you've had a rough go of it. Of course you're anxious, it's an anxious time without all the cause for extra worry you've had! Don't worry about being stressed, just take care of yourself physically. Accept that you're worried and that it is what it is, and just try to let go if it when you can - but DON'T give yourself a hard time about it! Listen to chill out music - things like the yoga/meditation/chill playlists on Spotify - sounds dumb but music has a massive effect on our subconscious. Watch some stupid fun TV and read trashy books and let your mind escape. You're so close now, you just have to get through the last bit. You've handled so much tough shit so far, you're awesome! Almost everyone worries with birth coming up, that's natural, you're doing nothing wrong and before you know it your baby will be here and your number one worry will be getting some sleep :-)