Unexpected First Pregnancy Aged 39 And I’m Terrified

[Pregnantandinshock]

Found out that I’m 4+4 weeks pregnant yesterday and to say I’m in shock is an understatement! 😳 I’m 39 (40 at the end of the summer), with a BMI of 35 and I have PCOS… so not exactly a great start is it? 😕 I also have psoriasis, carpal tunnel (was just about to get steroid shots in both my wrists! 😫) and I am also waiting for investigations into possibly having IBD 😳 I’m also due to have two different surgeries under general anaesthetic- one can be postponed but one is quite important and will risk the hearing in one ear if delayed. I also suffer with really bad anxiety and stress about anything and everything! 😳 How has a body as broken as mine managed to get pregnant now when I couldn’t 10 years ago and had no plans to now?! 😮😫 To say I am terrified is an understatement, I’m worried sick about whether my body can withstand a pregnancy with all the issues above. I know that with just my age and BMI I would be high risk but add in some of my health issues and it all makes it so much harder to know what to do for the best. I’m also worried about whether the health of the baby would be at risk as I think I’ll be high risk for gestational diabetes and probably high BP… I usually take lots of vitamins/supplements to help all my above conditions so have been taking the recommended dose of folic acid thankfully but have stopped those now and have got some pregnancy vitamins arriving today to start taking instead.

Despite all the above, I can’t help but feel this baby was meant to be, it would have been conceived on our wedding anniversary and the due date from dating my last period falls on my DH’s birthday 😳 DH and I have discussed not continuing with the pregnancy, simply due to my awful health but I know that I need more time to consider all my options as it’s so new, I’m still in shock.

I should add that finances are currently OK and we own our own home, which has lots of room for a baby. I’m just concerned about continuing with my health the way that it is but I’m also thinking, can I really bring a baby into the world given the current state of it? 😕

Has anyone else been in a position of finding themselves unexpectedly pregnant, in poor health etc. and had a healthy pregnancy, birth and baby? Thanks for reading if you got this far!

Hi OP, that must have come as a shock, but you can do this! It’s great that you’ve been taking folic acid. The risk for BP and GD will be managed by your midwife/consultant so try not to worry about those. Plenty of women with risk factors have healthy pregnancies and babies every day. I had bad anxiety in pregnancy and self referred for CBT which helped. I’ve got IBD - it pretty much went away for both of my pregnancies and a lot of the meds are safe. They probably won’t do a colonoscopy until baby has arrived but they will have dealt with this scenario before. Maybe try making a list of hurdles in order of priority and go through the management of each one with the relevant team. Good luck, I’m sure you’ll do great x