How to cope with three children?

[he1620]

I have an almost 6 year old, a 1year 8 month old and I'm 7-8 weeks pregnant. This pregnancy was not planned and I'm really struggling with it. My partner and I were going to start trying again in around a year or so when we've moved house and my youngest is in nursery

We live in a small 2 bed house so have no other option but to move house, which is stupidly expensive with rent being over £1000pcm for a three bed where I live.

I wanted to go back to work before having this baby but we can't really afford nursery. I hate the thought of me not being able to work for another 3 years

I know it's a good age gap as my daughter will be 2 years and 4 months when this baby is born but I'm not sure how I'm going to cope 😭 I want to be excited about this baby, I feel so so guilty because there's so many women out there that would kill for a baby. Termination isn't an option as I don't think I could live with myself if I did that, when we were going to try in a year anyway

Not sure what the point in this post is, just needed to rant!

I have 3 - 2 of which are twins. And I work full time and then some. Yes it's hard not going to lie and full on - I barely get a chance to sit down and sleep is a distant memory! So is money! But honestly you will adapt and Cope. Yes being a family of 5 logistically can be difficult - I haven't attempted soft play yet with 3 kids off in different directions 😂 and trying to book hotel rooms is stressful!
But it's fun. And my 3 have a lovely relationship with each other - it makes it all worthwhile even if bed time is carnage and the piles of washing and ironing is endless

(I did struggle to conceive though and lost many babies and had to go through multiple rounds of IVF - so maybe that does make my thoughts on having 3 very different! I'd have more though in a heartbeat 💓 )

Why can't your current youngest go to nursery and then you can go to work? One of your kids will be at school anyway and if you can get free hours your second will be at nursery for a few hours. If not, could your middle child go to preschool or private nursery for a few hours a few times a week? Appreciate it is expensive but do you have any family nearby that could help?

I haven't found it that difficult to be honest but I have a supportive husband and my baby sleeps well. We don't have any family support. My older two are 15 months apart and that was tough going for a few years but did her easier. If you can stay organised and do little but often it is manageable in terms of housework etc it really helps. I'd focus on trying to move if you can.

I have 4 and no partner, (single parent) tbh you get by, plenty of mums with 3 or more kids you will find your own routine

By the time you come back from maternity leave, your daughter will be able to get the 15 (or 30 hours) of free childcare. You'll only have to pay nursery for your baby. I have 3 kids and it really is manageable. I have no family support apart from my husband. You will be ok. I'm now pregnant with twins, so I might stop work for a little while longer, but had it been a singleton, I would have waited a few more months to go back to work for my youngest to turn 3 and get the 30 hours of free childcare, and just pay for the baby. I do agree that you will need a bigger house. 5 people in a 2 bedroom seems like a lot. Maybe it's time to buy instead of renting?