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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

just need a rant- so FED UP of the 'hopefully it's a girl' comments

37 replies

2022xx · 22/04/2022 10:44

I am pregnant with baby number 2.

I have a little boy and we never found out the sex with him, and we are having a surprise this time around as well

i am literally sick to death of getting comments 'hopfully it will be a girl' or 'it's definatley going to be a girl'

when we told me FiL the first thing he said was 'oh hopefully this time it will be a girl' and it makes me so annoyed and upset

yes a girl would be lovely, but it it's a boy myself and my husband are not the slightest bit bothered, it's actually getting to a point where we are saying we want baby to be a boy!

I know sometimes people don't mean any harm by it, but it really is frustrating when we hear it EVERY DAY from the same people . before i even got pregnant with this baby , my MiL would say things like 'oh you will have to try for a girl next time' - like there is actually something you can do for this to happen!!

it makes me feel like my son is not good enough for people, or if i have another son they will not be as loved

rant over

OP posts:

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Paddingtonsmarmlade · 23/04/2022 08:52

It's weird I had the same when pregnant with dc2. I didn't care after a miscarriage the year before I just wanted a healthy baby. Then when she was a girl I had the you can stop now you have one of each. Then again my friend with 2 of the same got question when she was going to try for the other sex within days of having her second.

hesbeen2021 · 23/04/2022 08:57

I think it's uncalled for when it's your second child. However every single person I have known who has had, eg, three boys were only having a fourth baby in order to have a child of the opposite sex.
I can't actually imagine someone with four girls, eg, would consciously have a fifth child and wish for another girl. They may happily love and adore their fifth girl but I think in their hearts they would always wonder what it was like to have a child of a different sex

EmergencyPoncho · 23/04/2022 09:03

Hopefully it will be a healthy baby. People are idiots.

EmergencyPoncho · 23/04/2022 09:04

Argh I didn't mean to imply it wouldn't be!!!! I just meant boy or girl doesn't matter, just a healthy, happy baby.

onewednesdayindecember · 23/04/2022 09:12

I hated this when I was pregnant. I had my son and was then continuously asked when I was going to have another baby, which was so rude and tedious. It took us years to conceive again and when we finally got pregnant I thought the comments might end, but no it moved on to ‘I hope it’s a girl, you must want a girl, oh please let it be a girl’ etc etc (I didn’t particularly want another girl, I just wanted my baby, whichever sex it was). Then when I had another boy those comments subsided a bit and I got narky comments about the age gap and the fact that we shouldn’t have ‘waited’ to have another one. People are insensitive a holes in a nutshell and the comments never end (until they get bored of the children completely).

JacquelineCarlyle · 23/04/2022 09:28

We have 3 boys and people continually commented whilst pregnant about how desperate I must be to have a girl and then after my 3rd about having a 4th to get a girl! My 3 boys are amazing and I was never bothered about the sex, just happy to have them!

My youngest is 11 now so thankfully those comments have stopped (but they carried on until he was about 5, often in front of the boys!)

People are dickheads when you're pregnant as my friend got the exact same comments in reverse when she was pregnant as she had girls and how desperate she must have been for a boy (she wasn't!).

CarmenThePanda · 23/04/2022 09:33

Do they say this in front of your little boy?

HailAdrian · 23/04/2022 09:36

“you’ll be hoping the next ones a boy, they don’t talk so much”.

I'm sure many parents of boys, myself included, would tell her that's bollocks.

Awrite · 23/04/2022 09:42

People are weird. By all means, think something - but don't say it.

SallyWD · 23/04/2022 10:11

It's infuriating! I know mothers of girls will get asked if they're trying for a boy but still I think there's a real preference for girls! It drives me mad. I have one of each and my boy is just as wonderful as my girl. If I was you I would always respond with "Actually I'm hoping for a boy." each and every time someone says it. Just to shut them up!!

HumunaHey · 23/04/2022 10:16

Cakecakecheese · 22/04/2022 17:11

The obsession some people have with 'one of each' is madness. Having 2 of the same sex can actually be better logistically!

Yes, I love that I have 2 boys. I would have loved having 2 girls too.

As PP, said, logistically it's better. Plus I feel there's more potential for same sex siblings to have a closer bond as they'll experience the same/similar things (e.g. through puberty, relationships, etc). I'd go out clubbing with my older sister when we were younger too. I can't imagine being keen to do that with a brother.

The whole 1 of each is pointless, showy perfection. I'd have been happy with one of each. It would have been nice to experience having a daughter. But I love having two boys.

OtiMama · 23/04/2022 14:07

Totally get this, we have a son and I'm pregnant. everyone just presumes we want a girl, I'm actually going to be thrilled either way but would be so happy with a boy! I think people just think you must be lying but I feel like two brothers would be lovely for each other!

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