Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Flip

1 2

Original poster

When do you announce your pregnant?

28 replies

blueeyedunicorn · 02/04/2022 22:45

Hi I have had 2 miscarriages in the last 2 years both at around 4-5 weeks. Recently found out I'm pregnant with baby no2. PCOS and on clomid. I'm around 4 weeks.

When do people tell family / friends?

Announce it to everyone they know?

It's tricky because I know it's 'safe' to wait until 12 weeks as they say; but I also wouldn't want to pretend it 'didn't happen' if the outcome wasn't great again.

Thoughts and opinions from others please and when did you announce your pregnancy? :) x

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

mydudero · 02/04/2022 22:55

Congratulations on your pregnancy, and I'm really so sorry about your miscarriages.

I don't think there is any right or wrong, it's down to what feels right to you. I know that I am extremely lucky that I have had only 1 pregnancy so far which resulted in my now toddler. I found out at 4 weeks and within those early weeks went with my gut instinct share the news with those who I would go to for support in the event of a miscarriage. My immediate family and close friends knew within a couple of weeks of us finding out we were expecting because I knew they would be the ones that I would turn to.

I've never been one for announcing on social media but changed my profile pic to one of me with my OH & little bump at around 5-6 months simply because I loved the photo. By that point we had long told our nearest and dearest personally.

Wishing you all the best xx

wishuponastar1988 · 02/04/2022 23:00

Do what you feel is best. I told my parents, brother and sister in law when I found out at 5 weeks and then a close friend at 10 weeks. My other friends found out at about 12 weeks. I then went 'public' on social media with a post when I was 21 weeks - nothing major just a pic of the scan so that then the news was officially out! Xx

AwkwardPaws27 · 02/04/2022 23:30

3 MCs. This time I told close family & my best friend pretty much immediately as I knew we'd need some support if it went tits up again.

Social media for wider friends and family, I just popped a pretty lowkey post up acknowledging previous losses and saying we were expecting at around 24 weeks. No scan pic, as I found those difficult so wouldn't want to accidentally upset someone else. It meant I didn't have to tell people directly which I also found hard, as if they seemed excited I felt I needed to downplay things in case it went wrong.

Cheetocat · 03/04/2022 00:48

We told our parents at 7 weeks, will tell the rest of the family on Easter when I'm almost 11 weeks, won't be announcing on social media or anything, if family talks about it with others, that's ok.

FogniniFog · 03/04/2022 00:53

I'm very private so waited until after 12 weeks (when miscarriage risk drops significantly) but there's no right answer, it depends on you.

It doesn't have to be the same time for everyone. If the people you share the news with are people you'd want to support you if you experience a loss, then tell them now. I'm sure they understand if you say you want them to keep it quiet until later on, if that is what you want.

Glendaruel · 03/04/2022 01:38

I had two previous miscarriages. I decided to tell close family and friends as I would tell them if I miscarried and want their support, so figured they should have the joy first. I then told everyone after 12 week scan.

My second miscarriage my boss told people I was in hospital with an appendicitis, shame he didn't tell me. Led to some odd conversations....

I've tried to be open about my experience. People don't realise how common it is as we don't talk about it and I've found from comments that people knowing has helped them feel less alone/ that it's normal when they've experienced it.I

For me it was third time lucky.

arshenick90 · 03/04/2022 08:27

Hi, I was planning to wait until after my 12weeks scan, but I had a quick scan last Friday and it was reassuring enough for me to announce my pregnancy officially on 1st of April 😂 so I have let people to guess if this is a April fool'S joke or it's for real 😈

DizzySquirrel90 · 03/04/2022 08:30

Didn't tell parents till 9weeks then my sister at 12weeks and work at 16weeks, never announced on SM.

RussianSpy101 · 03/04/2022 08:31

I don’t announce to everyone I know.
I told my mum and sister when I found out so quite early.
Told my PILs after our 12 week scan.

We told the rest of our family and friends after our 20 week scan.

itssquidstella · 03/04/2022 08:47

I've had three first trimester miscarriages. When I found out about this pregnancy I told my best friend (and DH told his) immediately, but we didn't tell anyone else, even close family, until my 12 week scan (when I was actually 12+6).

We told most other friends and family between then and around 17 weeks. No official social media announcements, but DH posted a photo of us in the Peaks when I was 24 weeks with a caption that basically said how impressed he was that I was still climbing mountains with him at six months pregnant - based on the number of texts he then got, I think a lot of people found out then!

GinnyBee · 03/04/2022 08:47

I had two losses around 8 weeks, and found it a lot easier to recover when people knew, so we told family and closest friends fairly early on this time - I work for a family business so they found out maybe 5 weeks, and then I did a sports competition with a friend at 6 weeks and was starting to feel tired and queasy so she needed to know too. I didn't announce to a wider public at all though, just told people as and when I saw them. Also this time I had extra scans in early pregnancy so the family in the business needed to know about those so I could arrange being away from work.

CornishSeaSwim · 03/04/2022 09:41

I am currently 8 1/2 weeks, my husband obviously knows! Told my best friend as she has previously gone through IVF and I knew of her pregnancy very early on. I wanted someone to confide in as I have been feeling pretty rough and a bit anxious. My boss at work also knows as this had to be incorporated in to Risk Assessments due to the nature of my job and risks around covid etc.

I have my booking appointment next week, and hopefully scan a few weeks after, so all being well we will tell our parents and siblings after that. No plans to put anything on social media, it will be nice to tell friends and extended family as and when we see them. I am conscious some friends have gone through miscarriages etc and also I am not that in to announcing things on Instagram. I'm sure at some point when I start showing it will be obvious in photos

It's a very personal thing and totally up to you. I completely understand telling people who can provide support, it's a lot to go through alone.

JMPB · 03/04/2022 09:43

Have to do what’s right for you, there isn’t a right or wrong.
We told close family at 7 weeks after an early scan, extended family & close friends at
12 weeks and everyone else at 20 weeks x

Hopefullyoneday12 · 03/04/2022 09:46

12 + weeks for me.
That was to tell close family. Work colleagues who I see every day.
Wider circle of friends, family, general.. 20 + weeks.

But it's different for everyone.

I do feel slightly uncomfortable when friends / family tell me they are pregnant at just a few weeks. Having had several losses myself I always worry for them and also don't know how to react because being too celebratory early on seems risky.

Bakingwithmyboys · 03/04/2022 09:46

When I had my miscarriage, we had some signs that it might happen.
We did tell our parents and a group of very close friends.
When we then had to tell them the sad news their messages of just love helped me so much.
I remember this so strongly that I always try to send a similar message to others when they have had bad news.

As others have said, it's totally up to you, but I really did feel wrapped in support by people knowing.

ChloeHel · 03/04/2022 10:44

Congratulations!! With DD I told my parents when I first found out, then everyone else after 12 week scan!

With this pregnancy, again I told my parents straight away, my close family and friends were told at 7 weeks but that’s because I’ve had hyperemesis so I can’t hide not seeing anyone. I won’t be announcing this pregnancy on social media for others to know though as all the close people I need to know, know.

Nikki037297 · 03/04/2022 11:23

I waited until my early scan then told my close family. I’m 14 weeks and having my gender scan in a week. I plan to announce the big news then to everyone else. But I’m scared as some family member in my partners family can’t have children and her reaction last time was awful and I’m scared of upsetting her again so that’s why I still haven’t told partners family

CSR721 · 03/04/2022 16:09

I told a bunch of people straight away. I'm terrible at keeping my gob shut 🤦🏻‍♀️ just close friends and people at work who could look out for me. We told our immediate families last Sunday, after we'd been for a scan at 7w 3d and seen the heartbeat. We are telling a few more friends next weekend as we don't see them often and want to share with them in person. Then will be telling everyone else after 12w scan

Tacoboutit · 03/04/2022 18:52

So sorry to hear about your losses.

I suffered a MC at 10 weeks last year. I had told my parents at sister at 8 weeks. My partner’s parents were abroad so they didn’t know. They only found out about our MC when they came home. Despite not telling many people I was pregnant, I was very open about my MC. And a lot of people I spoke to confided that they’d also went through something similar. It’s just never spoken about. So that helped.

I’m very fortunate to be 22 weeks pregnant now. However I waited and told our parents/siblings after the 12 week scan. I didn’t want them worrying about me in the first trimester. Although I was rather sick so I think they maybe guessed. Told close friends and my boss at around 17 weeks (I work from home). No social media announcement for me either but that wouldn’t have been my taste even first time around anyway. But we’re going away on a little holiday in a few weeks and no doubt I’ll put up a couple of pics so it’ll be obvious then.

Hope you’re keeping well and looking after yourself x

Dipsydoodlenoodle · 03/04/2022 23:48

Both sets of parents found out maybe 8 weeks (same time we found out). Close family and friends found out after the 12 week scan and general friends found out after the 20 week scan.

Dipsydoodlenoodle · 03/04/2022 23:49

I should maybe add to my post, 20 weeks was easy for me as we were in lockdown so no one saw a bump

RoundGlass · 04/04/2022 00:20

Told everyone at 3 weeks, but I've fortunately have never suffered a MC. In your situation I'd say 6 weeks.

20viona · 04/04/2022 03:15

I told close friends straight away and parents at 8 weeks when we had a private scan. Family and friends and 12 week scan and il put it on social media at 20 weeks when we know the sex.

Climbingthelaundrymountain · 04/04/2022 04:13

I told my best friend within a few days of getting a positive pregnancy test. But we didn't tell anyone else until after our first scan with all our babies.

Cocobeau · 04/04/2022 09:12

I'm currently 7+1 and aside from my husband the only people I have told are my best friend and my PT. I'm on the older side so I don't feel comfortable sharing with people until we know things are ok. Some people want a support team in case of the worst happening but for us, the few people we'd have to share bad news with, the better. I think I may go for a private scan around 8 weeks at which point we may tell my in-laws, partly because we are struggling to keep dodging committing to travel plans later in the year but everyone else will wait until at least 12 weeks.

Flip

1 2