To bring mat leave forward?

[Sprat12]

I am 35+1 and really struggling with work. I wfh and have been doing 3 days a week for the last month as I've had all sorts of heath issues with this pregnancy.

Currently really struggling with being sat in front of my laptop all day, albeit only for 3 days per week. For many and varying reasons I am not sleeping, and therefore having to get up and be logged on first thing is not helping, I am exhausted by 10am.

I've got holiday booked and due to finish on the 13th April anyway, however I am being induced at either 38/39 weeks (tbc by consultant).

I'm wondering whether to just bring my mat leave forward and finish sooner. I feel awful - really struggling health wise, and also feeling dead guilty about the idea of moving my mat leave. I keep thinking that it's really not that long to wait so I should just crack on until the 13th, but then I feel so dreadful I can't stop thinking about finishing sooner rather than later.

Any thoughts / recommendations?

Yes, it sounds like that would be a good idea. Of course you'll get less at the other end, but if you need it now you should go off.

I wish I'd started mine earlier. I was crippled by SPD in the final weeks and yet sill struggled into the office. No idea why, and I wouldn't have minded going back a few weeks earlier as I was bored out of my mind.

I've just finished at 33 weeks. This is DC2 and I'm exhausted - I worked up to 36 weeks with DD and it was awful. I hated every second and ended up having to take extra leave because I was too tired to work a full week without a rest day. This time round, I decided to be kinder to myself.

That being said, I've finished at 33 weeks with four weeks' annual leave so won't start actually maternity leave until 37 weeks. Do you have any more annual leave you can use to bridge the gap?

You don't get any prizes for struggling on, just do it. I'm starting my mat leave this Thursday at 33+2 (will have to take annual leave at the end, but it doesn't make any difference to the duration of leave I get) - also working from home 3 days a week so not physically demanding. I'm not really even struggling, I've had an easy pregnancy, but just didn't want to work any longer.

I guess because in my home country maternity HAS TO start minimum 30 days before the due date, I've always thought it slightly insane trying to work all the way up to the birth, and viewed the month before as important time for final prep and rest before inevitable chaos.

I work in retail and when I found out I was pregnant I was really just shoved on a till and sitting for 6 hours minimum and was also on shifts finishing at 11pm and that's when I decided to go off at 34 weeks instead of waiting till the end of 37 weeks. Also getting induced at 38 weeks, so worked out 4 weeks at home to rest, get bits done and just regroup with myself and im nearly 2 weeks into maternity leave now and I'm so thankful I did finish early. I feel more calm, more content, less stressed.

Do whatever you feel best, but like another poster said, you don't get any rewards for staying later. You won't get this time back with yourself before baby arrives

I finished work at 6pm one Friday and was in hospital by the Monday, I barely had time to do anything!! Finish early if you need to - enjoy some rest before baby comes! Xx

Thanks ladies, it’s good to know that no one seems to have regretted finishing early. I do have some holiday left to take so think that will be a better shout than moving my mat leave, as at least I will have more time with baby.

I just want to be able to not set an alarm in the morning, potter about the house and hopefully enjoy a couple of weeks of sunshine before LO arrives.

It’s so tough not to feel guilty about finishing earlier though 🙈 just need to write an email to my manager to explain why I’ll be asking for further holiday to be booked in… wish me luck!

Hey @Sprat12 ! I am 24 weeks at the moment but feeling EXHAUSTED. Had lots of issues with this pregnancy (including HG which is still have) and am thinking of starting Mat leave at 32 weeks. I originally wanted to start mat leave on my due date but struggling to manage work already. Don't feel guilty about taking the time you need. Pregnancy is hard and you need a rest too. X

I just want to be able to not set an alarm in the morning, potter about the house and hopefully enjoy a couple of weeks of sunshine before LO arrives.

This, with the alarm, was a big part of my decision! I want not to have to prioritise being at work, even from home, and not to have to rush around, and to be able to have a little nap. I don't think you'll regret it!

100% do it. I finished at 35 weeks and sat here with 4 days left before he arrives I’m so pleased I did. The lack of sleep you describe is a kicker and you need the rest. As another poster said, there’s no prizes for struggling through and you want to be as rested and relaxed as possible for when your little one arrives.

I'd see if I could get signed off by the midwife first rather than moving it earlier!

Any suggestions on how to word this email to my manager? I’m crap when it comes to stuff like this