Elective c section request - given 2 options

[Mol22]

Option 1: Book for 40 or 41 weeks to allow chance to go in to labour naturally...

Option 2: Book for 39 weeks

Obstetrician has booked me another appointment for when I’m 34 weeks and asked me to decide between the two options. She is also arranging for me to speak to a consultant midwife about my concerns around a vaginal birth.

It’s my first baby and my fear is not around labour or pain rather something specific that is more likely the later/bigger a baby is and when interventions have been used to start/progress labour, which is why I wonder if I should wait and see if it starts on it’s own.

Saying that I have done hypnobirthing and pregnancy yoga and it hasn’t really made any difference to my gut feeling that says c section is the right choice for me.

Has anybody been given these options? What did you choose? I haven’t spoken to many people in real life about it because my friends are very pro vaginal births/hypnobirthing and I don’t want family to know the date if I do go for a c section as I wouldn’t if I went in to labour.

Next time my plan is to say I’ll have a vaginal birth unless induction is required in which case I’d go straight for a c-section. Would this be an option for you?

My son was born at 40+5 but only weighed 6lb 9 so a late baby doesn’t always mean a big baby :)

My baby was born at 42 weeks and 7lb13.

Later definitely doesn't equal bigger.

I would go 41 weeks to a chance to go into labour but avoid an induction

What do you want?

Just remember they aren't always correct with sizing.

But I agin ask what do you want?

It's up to you and how you feel. Your body and your baby. You could choose option one and get there and they could tell you the baby is 7lbs or could tell you the baby is 12lbs and it could all be wrong. You have to do what you feel is right. You will know nearer the time your heart will tell you.

Of a vaginal birth is a for sure a no from you then you have too lovely options to choose from DONT stress speak with your partner and go from there

@TheBirdintheCave yes that is an option from what she said, although I wasn’t expecting it to be! I definitely don’t want an induction.

Size is just one factor and not the main one, although if I’m told baby is likely to be very big (at the moment this isn’t the case) that would sway me towards a c section. I know the measurements aren’t always accurate either but I think if I was told they may be big that would increase anxiety around the birth.

I’ve chosen to have a c section. I don’t really get a choice of when it takes place so going for 39 weeks as the baby is full term by then.
My baby is currently big but I am still able to have a c section. All the midwives have been lovely, they’ve reassured me that with my baby being bigger they would be easier to push out!
Sit with consultants and discuss the options. I have really bad anxiety so I’ve kept away from reading different websites. I’ve only looked at nhs ones and ones recommended by the midwife- it’s definitely helped!

@BrokenRecords I’m fairly certain I want a c section. I would love a vaginal birth with no complications but nobody can ever ensure that. I’m much more comfortable with the risks/recovery around a c section.

I would just feel a bit guilty not even trying but I think that’s because everybody around me (I know a lot of people who recently had babies!) keep giving me tips and lovely resources on hypnobirthing and vaginal births. When I mentioned even considering a c section I got quite muted responses and one friend told me how guilty she felt that she never had a contraction (needed a last minute c section) and feels like it’s something we should experience - I don’t think I feel like that myself but guess I feel guilty for not feeling that way when everybody else seems to!

@Hiddenvoice I think if I 100% decide I want a c section they will definitely book me for 39 weeks too.

I was expecting to have to fight for them to even consider it and everybody’s been so lovely and accommodating that I’m a bit thrown!

I’m fairly certain I want a c section. I would love a vaginal birth with no complications but nobody can ever ensure that. I’m much more comfortable with the risks/recovery around a c section.

This is EXACTLY how I feel too. If someone could promise me that I'd have an uncomplicated delivery that progressed at a decent pace, then yeah, I'd do that. But there are no guarantees, and I certainly don't want to be induced, have an assisted birth, 3rd or 4th degree tearing, or emergency c-section. And the best way to avoid all of those is to have an elective c-section. I'm also much more up for dealing with a wound infection than faecal incontinence.

I haven't had the discussion about booking it in yet, but have had the necessary approvals for it to go ahead. Next consultant appointment when it'll get booked is in two weeks, I'll be 34 weeks then. So far they've said they do them on week 39 and nothing so far has suggested they'd offer going past due date, and I wouldn't want that anyway - if I go into labour before my scheduled c-section I'll still be asking they do it as an "emergency" caesarean then.

I've only had a couple of comments from people who seemed confused about it, but no one has tried to push me to change my mind. A few friends have also said that they wished they'd known they could ask for one and they would have, but they didn't know it was even an option.

I guess it depends on where you live.
In Scotland you have the right to have one if you want one.
If a doctor refuses then they can pass you onto another doctor. They mainly want you to feel comfortable with whatever you choose so they will support you to make the decision that suits you and shouldn’t push you into anything you’re not sure about.

If you’re set on a c-section I’d still plan for it to be as late as possible.

Unless there’s a complication keeping baby where they want to be for as long as you can is generally what’s best for baby. An extra week inside can make a difference.

Not a difference that you’d be able to notice years down the line but a short term one.

Baby will be a better weight, it could mean they take to breastfeeding a bit easier and their lungs would be more developed.

@Hiddenvoice England, I think the guidance has recently been updated here so I wonder if that’s why I didn’t get the push back I was expecting. Saying that I’ve constantly been impressed by my trust and the maternity services in my area and haven’t experienced any of the issues accessing services that people frequently do. They are a women’s hospital so not sure if that makes a difference.

I was similar to you and settled on trying for a vaginal birth, but with a c-section booked for 41 weeks and an agreement that we'd have a low threshold for switching to a c- section prior to that. Any need for induction, failure to progress etc and we would switch to c- section. As it was I had to have a c- section for medical reasons, but I'm still pleased I had that arrangement.

@GinnyBee 34 weeks is when they’d book mine by the sounds of it too.

It’d be lovely if somebody could promise us an uncomplicated delivery but all those possibilities/complications do worry me far more than those that come with a c section. I know a two people who had serious complications and are planning c sections for their second babies but then I know of others who had quick and relatively lovely births. It’s impossible to know what way it would go. A big worry for me is that my anxiety itself would make it worse if I panicked.

Take time to weigh it all up. I know I’ll feel anxious on the day of the c section but I’m going to keep reminding myself that I’ve learned and prepped everything I need.
Do what feels the most comfortable for you and what will help you put your mind at ease a little.
If you’re booked in at 34 weeks and go for a 39 date section then you’ll still have plenty of time to mentally get yourself ready

It sounds to me like you want a c-section and you're feeling guilty about it, so trying to find ways to make it a more legitimate choice. But the thing is, a c-section is just as good as any other birth, and if it's what you feel best about it's what you should do.

I get the guilt - especially if you've got friends making unhelpful comments. But honestly the birth part is one day of your entire journey as a parent, and picking the right birth for you might well mean going into motherhood better prepared mentally and emotionally.

Also bear in mind you'll be a bit subject to their diary, so 39 weeks might well end up being 39+4 or 5. I'm really not convinced that 39+4 or 40+1 are going to be very different experiences for the baby in terms of readiness to be born.

Whatever you choose, just don't feel bad. There is no wrong way to give birth if it's done with informed consent.

@Sackofnickles

My baby was born at 42 weeks and 7lb13.

Later definitely doesn't equal bigger.

Absolutely - 31+5 here and she weighed 5lbs 11oz.

41+5 obviously 🙄

I find your post and all of the responses really interesting.

I had an induction with my first at 42+1 and he wasn't born until 42+3 via emergency c after 3 failed ventouse attempts so I totally understand your reluctance to go through that!

With my second I had an elective c at 40 after sweeps at 38 and 39.

The main reason for the elective was my fear of an induction (not the pain of contractions etc.) it was 'allowed' after measurements of my pelvic outlet showed to be small.

Even though the first birth was horrific and traumatising I am glad I went through labour (he was literally 'at the door', my husband could see his head). It felt like I 'did the work' to get him. I did feel that missing with my second.

So I would definitely wait as long as you can before scheduling your c.

I should probably add that my reasoning for choosing the route for my second birth (natural then c-sec if necessary) is that I had a 3rd degree tear the first time so I'd like to avoid any birth process that would increase the likelihood of a second tear eg induction whilst still aiming to give birth vaginally again.

But I'll also say that thanks to the hypnobirthing course I did, I still think back on his birth as a really positive and memorable experience. I think about five minutes after he was born I said 'I'd do that again'. I didn't have any lingering trauma or complications from the tear and I healed very well and really quickly :)

[quote Mol22]@BrokenRecords I’m fairly certain I want a c section. I would love a vaginal birth with no complications but nobody can ever ensure that. I’m much more comfortable with the risks/recovery around a c section.

I would just feel a bit guilty not even trying but I think that’s because everybody around me (I know a lot of people who recently had babies!) keep giving me tips and lovely resources on hypnobirthing and vaginal births. When I mentioned even considering a c section I got quite muted responses and one friend told me how guilty she felt that she never had a contraction (needed a last minute c section) and feels like it’s something we should experience - I don’t think I feel like that myself but guess I feel guilty for not feeling that way when everybody else seems to![/quote]
I feel there is some sort of conditioning women go through where we are made to feel like we should want to give birth 'naturally' (hate that description - like anything else is abnormal) and that we have to experience pain of labour as some sort of right of passage. Each woman should do what she thinks is best for her. I was given options of induction, csection or just waiting to see what happens. I felt an immense sense of calm when I considered and elective csection as opposed to the other options so went with my gut. It was an excellent experience and I don't regret for one second that I didn't have a contraction or a vaginal birth - and I won't let anyone invalidate my birth experience.
Do what you feel best about and don't listen to anyone else :)
Good luck xx

I completely get where you are coming from OP. I also enquired about an elective CS as I am scared of the unknown - like you if I could be guaranteed a straightforward vaginal birth with no complications I wouldn’t consider a section. But we know that’s not possible.

In the end I was offered the elective CS but chose to go with vaginal birth as part of me actually felt a bit sad that maybe I would miss out on experiencing a vaginal birth (which in itself surprised me!). I’ve thought to myself that if it is horrendous I never have to go through it again

I am doing hypnobirthing to prepare myself, although I am toying with the idea if I get to the point of requiring an induction I may request a section as I don’t want to start on a path of a likely prolonged labour / requiring intervention etc.

I don’t think I have heard of any negative section stories from people I know going elective is not a bad choice- plus whatever you choose at the end of the day is right for you

Thanks everyone, all the responses are really helpful ☺️

I do feel completely clam when I think about an elective. I’m calmer about labour but not the actual birth part after doing hypnobirthing and I’m continuing with it as think it will be useful either way. A small part of me wants to know how I’d labour and have that experience and another part of me is worried about maybe wanting more than 2 children and the increase risks with each section. I keep bouncing between the pros and cons of each!

I’m happy I’ll be able to advocate for what I want when it comes to my next appointment ☺️

Mine was booked for 39+4. They didn’t offer me the choice of going in after my due date but the consultant told me if I was to go into labour naturally then there was always a chance I’d have to go have a vaginal birth I.e. if I was too far along in labour. As my last baby was a really fast labour had I been given a choice id have chosen to go before my due date, but as close to it as possible.

As it turned out, my waters broke at 36 weeks. I was offered an induction but I said I was booked in for an elective c section which they honoured and brought forward for me.

Good luck xx