Ok internet I need some help.
My child is nearly 4. They had a stroke at birth, all ok now but as they were my first, it was traumatic plus dealing with a new baby, not knowing what was to come, watching milestones like a hawk, not enjoying parenthood, etc etc. Anyway child is amazing, you’d never know.
Fast forward to now & I think I’d like another baby. I feel this quite strongly & it’s taken a long time to feel this way. No reason was found as to why the stroke happened, just ‘one of those things’, so not overly worried about that, I suppose sadly, my experience has opened my eyes to how wrong things can go & how ill babies can be, how they are not immune from these situations, cancers, genetic issues, etc etc. I’d love another baby but I don’t know if I’m mentally strong enough to get through a pregnancy. I have considered medication for the anxiety but given what happened, & despite not knowing why it happened, I just don’t want that sort of intervention in the fear that it would pose a risk. (Also trialled Sertraline, the ‘safe’ AD tablet for pregnancy but gave me chronic indigestion & had to stop) question is, has anyone felt the same as me & found a way through? Any ways to ease the anxiety? I don’t need to necessarily enjoy the pregnancy, I just want to feel as mentally resilient as I can without thinking something terrible is going to happen to baby. Or feeling doomed. Thank you if you read this far ❤️