I have been looking through the threads for some time now, and thought it would be good for me to write about what's going on with us, (Mummy and Daddy to be and our baby). In some ways I'm using this forum as a form of therapy I guess, as I've read similar threads on Mumsnet and probably many of you have heard this same story from other people going through similar concerns.
Before I continue - sorry for the essay!
I have been living in France since April and we found out I was pregnant in the beginning of October, (I'm currently 16 weeks 5 days). At our 12-13 week scan I think I went in relatively prepared, (I am a bit of a control freak so need to prepare myself for all possible outcomes)! In France it is standard to get the NT scan. In fact I don't even think we were given the option - it's all a bit of a blur really. I went in being aware of how and why this measurement is done but foolishly thought hey I'm 29 no reason to be overly concerned. Anyway the sonographer checked all of the measurements many times and we came back "high risk - 95th percentile", (2.7mm). She explained we were in the grey area. In France they have someone different to do everything - so at this point we were told we'd have to wait until our appointment with the gynecologist before anything could be explained to us, (scheduled a week later). Of course we couldn't wait this long so I researched as much as possible on the internet until I had convinced myself that 2.7mm wasn't so bad and that we shouldn't worry.
When seeing our Gyne she explained she wasn't certified to do the risk assessment and suggested we have a second opinion where a second measurement would be taken and a formal risk analysis carried out. At this point she explained we could be looking as chromosonal abnormalities and/or heart defects - something we had worked out ourselves. They arranged a hospital visit the next day, (I am just under 14 weeks at this point - still within the measurement window). We went in just hoping things hadn't gotten worse. She first of all did our risk assessment based on the initial measurements from a week previous and we were given a risk assessment of 1 in 164. We felt relieved - this wasn't a big problem.
Of course our relief was short lived as the second scan, (very high definition machines with very experienced staff) showed that the NT was now measuring 3.5mm, (to start with our baby had the cord behind it's neck so there was quite a bit of re-jigging the baby and re-doing of measurements as the initial measurements were around 5mm!) After this ultrasound she re-did the risk assessment and it was now 1 in 37 - we were so upset - we went from being given what we felt was good news to now what we felt was not so good news. The doctor tells us at this point that there is also a likliehood of a heart defect. AT this point I'm too emotional to understand her French, (she doesn't speak English and my partner doesn't speak French). She leaves us alone for 10 minutes while we let everything sink in. On returning she suggests we have CVS.
She explains she would be doing the procedure and that due to her experience etc the chance of miscarriage would fall in the 1 in 200 chance. She makes an appointment for us the next day and says we should go away and think about it and call her tomorrow if we don't want to go ahead with this.
We think long and hard about our options. I can not explain how difficult this was for us - so many things to weigh up. Termination would not be an option for us unless it was something seriously bad. However I knew that the rest of the pregnancy would be full of uncertanties and that I would want to be fully prepared if there was a problem of what that means so that I can provide the best for my child in birth and special after care if it's required. We decided that as the chances of having a problem far out-weighed the chances of miscarriage we would go ahead with the CVS.
The procedure itself went fine - a bit uncomfortable, but to be honest I don't care how much I hurt as long as the baby couldn't feel it, (I was told the baby wouldn't feel a thing). This was done on the 14th of December. We got told the first set of results would be available three days later, (they were available a week later). This was one of the hardest things calling up each day as you go through the fear and turmoil each time you pick up the phone. Our baby doesn't have Trisomy 21, 18 or 13. To be honest we wouldn't have a problem if our child had Downs Syndrome we were far more concerned with 18 or 13 given the short life expectancy.
We got the above results on the 21st of December, this would have been a complete relief, however she added on that the technician growing the cultures still thought there was a problem. The French in my experience appear to be very pessimistic - there's always a problem until they prove otherwise. Of course I couldn't focus on the results - just that the technician thought there was still a problem - what did this mean? Is it serious? What is she basing this on? As my French had deteriorated again I couldn't discuss this proparly so I had to get my gyne involoved, (she spoke English as well). She said she wasn't sure but that maybe the technician is just basing this on the NT measurement - what a rollercoaster of emotions. If this is the case then I felt more at ease - to us it means that our baby was diagnosed negative for three of the most common chromosonal problems with no further evidence to say there was a problem.
Christmas and New Year was to say the least not much fun, (I still couldn't get the technicians words out of my head). They said we should phone from the 29th of Dec for further results. From past experience we decided to wait until the 2nd of Jan to call. Alas the results still aren't in and we've been told our results may come back inconclusive... they may be ready next week.
And how do I feel now... am I glad I had the CVS - to be honest I wish I was completely ignorant of everything and was just able to get on with enjoying my pregnancy and not worrying that a problem may exist which will prevent my baby from surviving. If only we hadn't had the risk assessment - we are never having these done again. They cause (in many cases and I hope ours too) unnecessary worry! Despite all the prolonged agony with regards to waiting for the results, (providing they don't come back inconclusive) I am glad we did this as for the type of person I am, the longterm worry preceeding the birth would probably have been more harmful for our baby.
I don't know if my story is of any help to people going through something similar. In France they don't do the coinciding blood tests - all their risk assessments are based on a number of ultrasound measurements. I know for me I felt comforted by reading other peoples stories.
I will let people know my final results on this thread when eventually we get them. I actually move back to Scotland at the end of January and my partner moves to Baku with work, (6 weeks on, 2 weeks off). So hopefully we get some good news as it will be tough dealing with all of this and not being together.
I'd just like to add that I hope I have not offended anyone in this post and that I have referred to all issues appropriately and discussed syndromes in a non-offensive manner. My sincere apologies if I have/haven't.
Thanks for reading
Lou & Bump