Not happy in preganacy.

[Jamaisy82]

Hi I'm 39 and currently 12 weeks pregnant. I have been with my partner a year but was previously with him 10 years 7 years earlier and he's a good man. We have talked about children because obviously I'm 39 and he's 38 so kind of last chance. I was open to it as I didn't see a problem, I was still on the pill but found out I was pregant, I was so shocked I'd been on the pill basically all my life but had been ill with sickness bug and maybe that make pill not work. When I found out I was not overjoyed I felt nothing but panic. I told my partner and he was happy, he already has a 4 year old from a previous relationship and my own son is 21. I've been sick everyday and feel so ill and deathly and my hormones are all over the place, I would like to be happy when I tell someone but I'm not I feel miserable and scared. Has anybody else felt this way. I feel I don't want the child but I'm 50/50.

It's a shock so your feelings are completely natural. Just take your time and think about what you want to do and what is right for you.

Thanks. I think I may have antenatal depression, I haven't struggled with depression before but since I found out I have been so low. It's like I'm in somebody else's body. I don't want ti be around anybody and going to work I put on a happy face. I suppose I don't have long to decide just don't want to make incorrect decision and regret it. I'm so confused and I'm pushing my partner away.

@Jamaisy82 I am 16 weeks pregnant with a very surprising #4. I felt very, very like you until very recently. I have got more used to the idea recently, and I’m starting, very slowly, to get slightly excited about the new baby.

What I do know, is I would be devastated if anything happened.

I have spoken to SOOOOOO many people who have felt like this and, like everything, once you open up, it’s surprising how many people have felt the same.

I wish you all the very best. And I hope that you start to feel a glimmer of something positive soon.

Thanks you lucky star. Hopefully things get better, I think I'm just overwhelmed and a little scared. I was only 17 when I had my first child, if I could do it then I can do it now.

@Jamaisy82 how are you ? I hope things worked out OK for you ?
I am in the same boat as you. I am 7 w preganant and although this was planned I am not happy. I'm like living in someone else's body , not enjoying anything. Not feeling pregnant and worried about future. I have 2 older children (almost teens)already and when I was pregnant with them I felt nothing but joy and happiness. This time is different. I think my biggest worry is that the baby may be poorly or that I will have a mental breakdown and our already a bit difficult life will get even more difficult .
I always wanted a big family so not sure where all this is coming from :(
I think it doesn't help that the people who I told I am pregnant didn't react with happiness . When I told my sister she said : you had you life back now your children are older and you are going back to nappies again .
I wish I could turn back the clock.

FeelIcantdothis hi I'm now 23 weeks and feel alot better. Not major excited or anything but my mood has lifted. Not feeling so sick and ill each day has certainly helped. I'm having a little girl which is nice. Still not sure this is exactly what I want but it's happening now and I'm sure everything will work out in the end. I promise you things get better.

@Jamaisy82 I’m so glad to hear you are feeling better! I’m now almost 27 weeks and am starting to feel excited, and I’ve definitely almost come to terms with having alllllllll these children 🤣

best of luck with the rest of your pregnancies all.