Unplanned pregnancy - your stories

[peonies1988]

Hello everyone, I’m currently five weeks’ pregnant and it is unplanned. My husband and I had an “accident” and took the morning after pill but it was too late.

I currently have two children, 4 and 18 months. I had PND with both children and even though I love them more than anything, I do find it mentally challenging.

I have spoken with BPAS who are sending the pills for medical abortion but I can’t actually imagine taking them, even though in my heart I really don’t want a third child.

I’m wondering if anyone has been in this position, kept the pregnancy and ended up really happy in the end?

Thank you x

My son was unplanned.

His dad was abusive and didn't help with DD ( 14 months at the time ) I already had PND and it was so hard. We'd been split up a month and slept together once after scattering our first child's ashes ( our first unfortunatly died 2 hours after he was born )

I wasn't even late for my period when I found out. I just felt that terrible I did a pregnancy test to rule out pregnancy

I didn't want the baby, knew I'd be doing it all by myself and knew it would be hard. I wanted an abortion but couldn't bring myself to do it because of my first son dying.

The first year of his life was horrible. I had severe PND, was on my own with 2 small children and often thought about ending all of our lives. It was fucking awful. An awful time in my life and I feel so guilty looking back.

But he's 5 now. And he's my absolute world and I don't say that lightly. He tells me he loves me every day, he hugs me, kisses me, says hes glad im his mummy, he makes me laugh so hard, hes so funny and outgoing

I cry when I think that I might not of had him. Keeping him was the best decision I ever made, he literally lights up my life

BUT

If you have 2 already and you don't want a 3rd you shouldn't push yourself into it. PND is a horrible horrible thing to have and I wouldn't wish it on anyone. You've got to do what makes you happy OP

Also. I didn't love my son until he was a year old. I looked after him, fed him, clothed him, did the basic necessary things to keep him alive. But I regretted having him until his 1st birthday and that's when the PND lifted, literally on his first birthday the fog fell down and I was like wow. As if your my son as if your here to stay

But that first year was awful and I did contemplate ending all of our lives several times.

If you took the morning after pill is it that much difference taking these if you are early on? It depends how you rationalise things with yourself I guess

Sorry you are in such a difficult position

Thank you so much for sharing with me @Bajezzeuz. I’m so sorry you went through that, and on your own. I’ve been in those depths of PND and I wouldn’t wish it on anyone. They are so lucky to have you as their mum, you are so strong for carrying on and I’m so glad you have what you do now. I’m also so sorry to hear about your first baby - to say you’ve been through it is an understatement. Sending you so much love xxx

Hey @Diamondbabe I have thought the same thing. I’m just a very sensitive person, and I’m hard on myself so I worry I’d feel awful forever. I know no one can tell me what I should do, just such a hard decision.