Doubts?

[bethj96]

Hi! I've just recently found out I am pregnant, I have never had any children and I am just feeling a little overwhelmed at the moment.
Me and my partner have only been together a short time, so I feel like my emotions are all over the shop.
I feel like I'm second guessing myself, I'm nervous, I don't think it's actually settled in yet. Are these normal feelings? Has anyone else felt like this?

Thanks x

Your not alone! So I'm married, been with my husband many years now & don't have children. This is all we wanted, planned it for years. BUT I am also first trimester, a bag of nerves and doubts. Doubting if we can adapt, if we can manage financially, if we can be good enough etc. Doesn't matter how much you plan. I think this is so normal, hormones are crazy. It's a massive life change & deserves to be a bit worried over. I think it would feel strange not to worry a bit. For me, It all feels bit hypothetical at the moment, like it's not quite settled in yet I think it will hit me when I have a proper bump!

Good luck. I just keep reminding myself - you are going to be everything your little baby needs!

Yeah I am struggling with the financial side also! Work have taken my Nightshift from me for my own safety as I work with difficult patients, and this also means I can't do overtime so I have lost some money and I do overthink it and panic.

It does feel hypothetical for me too, I keep thinking to myself 'i can't believe I'm actually pregnant' it feels so strange.

I struggled with my thoughts last night as I just kept feeling guilty for all the thoughts running through my mind!! I keep asking myself am I doing the right thing, what happens if I don't bond with my baby, what if I can't do it! I don't think this a lot it is just now and again, and I feel like I can't really speak to my friends about it and my partner doesn't really understand as he is so excited and he is so in love already.

My mind is driving me nuts

It really helped me and my husband to sit down and work out the finances as I need to see visually what it's going to look like on paper. It's something I can refer to when I worry. I would also recommend calling your citizen advice line to discuss what benefits you may be entitled to as there are loads out there! childcare can be the most expensive, if you have family who can help it makes a massive different. We won't.

Friends in my life who have kids have really hammered into me about second hand almost everything as it only lasts a few months as they grow so quickly. People are giving baby items away for free or so cheap on FB marketplace. We have a very small home (1 bed house) so need to be savvy in not overbuying as limited storage. Amazing prams on FB for not much.

Also if you decide to breast feed, people on this app have said you'll save so much money as it's free - formula can be pricey

It's important that you have someone to speak to. At least you have these amazing apps these days, also speak to your MW when you meet her. Your anxieties need to be reassured, maybe say to your partner that you need to discuss things on more practical level, just to know what the future is going to look like. Just reassure your worries are not negative but you trying to prepare emotionally and practically. It's can be hard to talk when the other is so excited, they almost feel your being negative but it's so important. Maybe put it to him in a different way.