What it feels like

[Janeway]

I realised when I was expecting ds that no one had ever discussed with me what it feels like to be pregnant... yes, they'd talked about the sickness and discomfort and there'd been no end of horror stories, but nothing other than broad brushstroke statements about the positive feelings. All the books I found only described dealing with the negatives, or what was happening in a medical way. I could find no description of feeling the baby hiccup in the middle of the night, of how it feels when they turn...

Then it occurred - I had no real way to describe the sensations myself - our language, so descriptive for almost every other bodily function, was bereft of words.

Why is this ? - is it a hangover from previous times when pregnancy was only described in euphemisms? - are there other cultures where women have words for this experience and share them with their daughters? - is this lack of discussion of the positives part of the reason for the fear many women feel about pregnancy & childbirth, and for the low status it is given by many?

Perhaps our literary minded friends on mumsnet can find words for us to use..
Perhaps you might wish to share your wonderful experiences for those at the beginning, or about to enter onto this journey...
Should I ever have a daughter, I would want to be able to tell her about these things.

Oh I loved the hiccupping! Except it was always just when I was dropping off to sleep...

I guess the idea of something growing inside is quite alien in a way. I thought it was really weird before I got pregnant and experienced it. Perhaps it's just one of those things you can't imagine until you've done it. One guy I worked with was absolutely fascinated with the thought of how I could feel the baby moved etc and another was truly horrified when I describled seeing an elbow poking out of my tummy.

I can't think of a way of describing the feeling of someone rummaging about in my tummy other than just that - sometimes it was like someone rummaging through a handbag, looking for something!!

I loved feeling the baby kicking in my tummy. During both pregnancies I used to lie in the bath and pull in my (vestigial )tummy muscles to persuade the baby to move. Dh used to find it unsettlingly weird when he woke in the night and the baby was obviously awake but I wasn't - brought home to him that there were definitely three of us in the bed!

And I loved feeling around to see if I could figure out which bit of the baby was which.

My friend described the feeling of those early kicks as "like a fart that doesn't make it out" - I think I know what she means!

I describe the early feelings as the sort of 'implosions' you get on a long haul flight, when your tummy is in knots and developing wind!! Lovely eh?!
I'm 16 weeks and waiting for my first implosion!

Janus, I know what you mean...I used to have irritable bowel syndrome where the intestine gets all knotty and hard...feels v similar to that...I'm 16 wks too and feeling very 'full', but thank goodness the uterus is now above the bladder, no more night time wee-wees

My favorite time in my pregnancies was when I would lie in bed at night and watch the baby move around. It was like waves moving across my stomach.

Not supposed to say this... but childbirth itself is cathartic (sp?). I just remember feeling so dizzy on the gas & air and then the feeling as the baby's body... rushed/ebbed/flowed? out of me so quickly. Indescrible, indelible & unforgettable.

And then the waves of relief realising the baby was out and the worst of the pain was (finally) over.

Janeway - being pregnant... you feel special, as if you have a really precious secret and you feel a mixture of exhilaration and fear. Scared of the pain of childbirth but excited about what your body has achieved.

Even though there are pregnant women everywhere, you feel as if you are the only one who has ever really gone through it. You become fascinated by every tiny thing you experience and you really have to watch yourself so you don't bore the pants off people.

I absolutely loved being pregnant both times (even feeling sick in the first three months didn't put me off!). I enjoyed it but I didn't make a meal of it - ie I didn't waddle from month 3 onwards and I got on with life without expecting special treatment, even when a seat on the train would have been nice.

Savour as much of it as you can - it's really special and there's nothing you'll ever do that can compare with it.