Miscarriage - has it already happened?

[foxy90]

Hi All,
First time posting, I've been reading all of the threads over the last week while we've been going through investigations at hospital.

It's all been rather scary, first pregnancy and I've had to do it all alone as DH was not allowed in and the staff at the Women's Unit have left me in the dark until today.

I'm just wanting to know whether it's likely that the MC has already happened or whether I need to prepare myself for it...

Background:
I'm 7+5 today.
Everything was fine until Thu 20/01
We had sex, small bleeding after, that didn't last long.
Bleeding started again Sat 22/01 and progressed Sun 23/01 with cramping, rang 111, went to OOH GP who referred to the womens unit at hospital.
Internal exam showed closed cervix, bloods taken - results 227, repeat requested for 48 hrs time.
Bloods on 25/01 - 217.
Bloods on 27/01 - 221 (bleeding heavier and passed a few small clots)

During this time NOTHING has been said about what could be happening, I'm relying on Google and found cases of good/bad outcomes.

Bloods 31/01 - 323, phone call received and was told registrar would call back, she didn't so I followed up and was told I needed to come in 01/02 to have the methotrexate injection - I said I wasn't going to agree until I knew 100% it wasn't viable.
Went in 01/02 - they refused to scan and said the pregnancy is definitely not progressing.

The consultant agreed to see what happens before intervention as the bleeding stopped 29/01 and no cramping so I've got another lots of bloods 10/02.

Is it likely the small clots last week with the bleeding was it? Or do I need to prepare for it...

Thanks for reading and sorry it's so long, really anxious and feeling in the dark about it all

I'm so sorry you're going through this! :(

They likely wo t scan because if your levels are under 1000 you won't see anything, unfortunately for a viable pregnancy your levels need to near double every 2 days and because yours haven't been doing that it's unlikely to be viable, especially if you're certain you're 7 weeks and 5 days- your levels should be in the high thousands :(

Miscarriages are awful, I've been through 3 myself and I wouldn't wish them on anyone 😔 I hope they give you all the time you need and don't push anything on you, sending hugs

Thanks for taking the time to read my post and reply and sorry to hear of your losses.

I did end up getting more info today about the HCG levels etc, but she was really blasé about it all and only took the time to explain everything once I'd burst out crying when she said it doesn't look viable, it was such a shock and I felt so silly not being more prepared for the bad news.

We'd not been trying for long, so I'm just telling myself that it wasn't meant to be and I'm hoping it passes quickly, so we can try again soon when we're ready.

Thank you for the hugs

@foxy90 take the time you need to heal and when you're ready have trust in your body!

I had my daughter first she was first pregnancy and it was all fine, then we had 3 losses, after those we were blessed with my son and now I'm 8 weeks pregnant with our surprise 3rd- unfortunately the anxiety never goes, but you learn how to manage it xx

I'm sorry you are going through this and left in the dark.

Hey @foxy90 how are you doing?

I am so sorry you're going though this. I've been through two miscarriages (both trying to conceive my first) and absolutely no one prepares you for what it means if it doesn't work out.

I'm so sorry that the nurses haven't been very empathic. My experience is that some times they are absolutely brilliant and so lovely. Other times, I think they can forget that although they say and hear these thing everyday, we as the patients don't...

Just know that you're not alone and if you ever need to chat I'm happy to help 😊

Regarding viability, it's your right to ask to be scanned to check it isn't viable and they should do this.

My last miscarriage was a missed miscarriage (where the baby stops growing but you don't actually miscarry). They said my best option was medical management and they were perfectly happy to scan me again for my peace of mind. They should be scanning you anyway to confirm it isn't ectopic.

In these situations you have to be your own advocate. If you're daunted by it take someone with you so they can advocate for you.

Best of luck op xxx

@SunDance21 thanks for your reply.m and sorry to hear of your losses.

I didn't realise quite how common this is.

I'm doing ok, still in shock I think...

My DH thinks it may be because I'm quite confident outwardly even though I'm panicking inside.

I've not been allowed anyone with me unfortunately, I pushed for my DH to be be there yesterday but while we waited (45 minutes because although I'd told 3 people I was there apparently they didn't know!) he was asked to leave by 2 members of staff even though I'd explained I wasn't making any decisions on my own.

I'm trying really hard not to be put off by what's happened and I know I'll feel differently with time but right now I'm just so angry with how flippant the staff have been with me, I just dread the thought of going back there.

@EllieJai44 congratulations and thank you for your kind words xx

Thought I'd update this thread with what has happened, in case anyone comes across it in the future and wants to know the outcome.

So following the initial week of bleeding, with pretty static HCG levels, I'd had no more bleeding or cramps for a week and a half, the consultant agreed on 01/02 to wait 10 days and repeat the bloods, which was today at 10am.

I'd had some spotting yesterday that did seem to get heavier into the evening. Went to bed and couldn't sleep, I tossed and turned all night. My husband works away a lot and thankfully he returned early this morning just in time for me to miscarry before todays hospital appointment.

The EPU don't want to confirm it's a miscarriage until my bloods come back but they said based on what I described it did sound like that was what had happened.

Both nurses I spoke with today were lovely and it reassured me that my bad experience the other week weren't a reflection on the department as a whole, I think I must have just been there on a particularly busy/stressful day.

Although I am sad, I think I did most of my grieving last week so now it's just a case of riding out the next few weeks, hoping I can get back to a normal cycle soon so we can think about trying again in the future.

Hoping everyone who may be going through the same thing gets their rainbow babies soon 🌈 💜