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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

im 12 wks pg my husband just been rushed in with heart attack im terrified

57 replies

disneystar · 29/12/2007 22:04

i know this has nothin to do with me but i had my booking in visit today and me and hubby were so happy we went out shopping and then tonight he collapsed with chest pains called paramedics they took 25 mins to arrive i had to revive him via the phone call with paramedic when they arrived hes gray low weak pulse irregular heartbeat they suspect heart attack hes 30 yrs old im so terrified i cant stop crying he didnt want to leave me but i knew he had to go im so alone here i have no family i just needed someone to listen surely this isnt good stress for me to be having will it affect my pregnancy

OP posts:
kindersurprise · 30/12/2007 01:24

Glad to hear that he is doing ok.

Don't worry about your holiday, tell him that there will be other holidays. Your DCs only have one Dad.

I am thinking of you, hope that you get some rest tonight. Best wishes for a speedy recovery

fortyplus · 30/12/2007 01:25

Bless you - hope all goes well for all of you. Best find out where you stand re: holiday insurance - he won't be able to travel so soon if it's a heart attack, but if you've got insurance it should cover a refund for all of you.

OverRated · 30/12/2007 01:37

Oh disneystar {{hugs}}

DO you have any help there? Someone to watch the children for you? Or to help with groceries/ meals?

Glad that your DH is being looked after.

spackcat · 30/12/2007 10:05

So sad for you disneystar, must be a terrifying time for you - although at least your dh seems to be stable now, he is in the best place and I hope he gets better very soon. Call on whoever you can at this time, they will understand. Sending lots of hugs your way, take care xx

kd73 · 30/12/2007 10:09

What a dreadful time disneystar Star
Sending positive messages your way for things to improve.

millie1 · 30/12/2007 11:39

Sorry to hear this Disneystar ... I hope your husband gets good results from his blood test today and there is minimal if any damage to his heart. Please keep us posted and try to look after yourself too.

orangehead · 30/12/2007 11:59

Thanks for the update disney, hope the results go ok. Hugs to you all

FairyTaleOfNewYork · 30/12/2007 12:02

oh disney just seen this. it has bought back some bad memories for me, but this is about you.

do you have anyone close by who can help you over the next few weeks.

disneystar · 30/12/2007 20:02

thank you all for your kind and encouraging words my husbands blood results were no lasting damage to his heart everytime he lies down his heart goes to under 40 beats per min hence why the attack they suspect blocked arturies somewhere and keeping him in for treadmill tomorrow to see what happens hes incredibly weak hes a big man 16 stone and just solid muscle but when he cuddled me tonight hes just so weak hes still grey in the face and on meds and no appetite at all ive cried all day one my hormones are raging still in one day i nearly lost him that was just a shock to the system hes always been my rock we are so united together its unreal we only have each other and no other family like parents etc....the doctors said they are going to give us a care plan no idea what that is yet
his job is a long distance lorry driver also very manual and you have to be physically fit he cant do that anymore they said i actually feel guilty being pg i could of worked instead of him i just want to sleep tonight and hope and pray for good news tomorrow x

OP posts:
lockets24 · 30/12/2007 20:28

my thoughts are with you and your family, take care

xx

kindersurprise · 30/12/2007 20:39

Disney,
don't despair. It was a huge shock and you have to come to terms with that.

He is in the right place. Once they find out what is wrong they will be able to tell you how they are going to help him.

Hope that they are able to pinpoint the problem tomorrow and give you some answers.

sleepdeprivationandme · 30/12/2007 20:53

Big hugs to you all. Every thing crossed for you.xx

mammabelleboo · 30/12/2007 21:39

Disney - so sorry for your news and your situation. Am thinking of you and hubby - he is in safe hands now - stay positive and be brave! Try and relax a bit if you can - have you no friends or family at all who are there to support you? Not even on the end of the phone? Might sound daft & i'm not really religious, (my in-laws are) and I know in their parish, a friendly ear is always available in the shape of the priest or community nun - no matter what religion (or not) - just a thought if you have no-one for support adn you just want to talk to someone face-2-face?? Anyway, take care & big hugs x.

pollydoodle · 30/12/2007 22:57

disneystar, I know what you're going through - my dh collapsed with a heart attack three days before my ds was born. It was a horrible traumatic time for both of us and there is nothing really that anybody can say that can make things easier for you right now. And at least I didn't have other children to worry about which must be adding to your stress.

on the other hand, the good news is that your husband is alive and in the right place - being looked after in hospital. it will be a long journey for both of you for him to get back to health but now that he is in the system he should get the drugs and aftercare to make sure that long term he has a good recovery - I ended up thinking of it as a silver lining that he had had an attack when he did (horrible as it was) as it would have been SO much worse if the underlying condition had got worse and he'd had a fatal attack a year or two down the line. And like you, I'd always thought of dh as the fit,healthy and strong one.

as wmmchoc said - recovery can take a long time - from dh experience I would have said that 6 weeks was an absolute minimum, just to be getting back up and about. he went back to work at 3 months afterwards, part time orignially and that was too much too soon, but think he just wanted to do it to prove to himself that he was OK if you see what I mean. Rehabilitation takes time and sometimes by doing too much too soon you end up taking one step forwards and two steps back, so no matter how frustrating it is, make sure he doesn't try to rush it! 2.5 yrs on and dh still can get tired more easily and isn't back to his old self, he still has to take care with things.

If you can, try to make sure that dh gets to go on a rehab course or two (dh's was run by community and hospital physios) that cover physical and mental rehab, along with things like looking after yourself, what to eat, lifestyle changes etc. if you can go too, that would be great as tbh there is a lot to take in and your dh won't be feeling great and thus probably not taking it all in.

there is lots of useful info on the british heart foundation website, they also have lots of useful leaflets that we picked up from the cardiac ward.

definitely worth trying to see the cardiac consultant with your dh before he is discharged as previously mentioned. remember to ask if they think that there might be any inherited reason why your dh has had an attack so early - and if there is anything they can do to scan your children to check that they are not going to be similiarly affected.

also, make sure that when he is discharged, that you get some follow up numbers to call if you have any questions or queries or worries - it is very easy to get very worried by every little twinge and pain, most of the time the stress of it is probably worse than the little twinge but there can be after problems and being able to ring up the ward/cardiac nurse/etc who know your history will be a relief - they will be able to say 'don't worry' or 'ring for an ambulance' or something inbetween and that will put your mind at rest.

on a practical but horrible note - have you and your dh made wills? Incredibly difficult subject to bring up I know, but it is worth getting one done asap, if, god forbid, the worst should happen. doesn't have to be fully thought out or complicated - they can be changed after death by a deed of variation very easily. but if there is no will, ie he is intestate, there are rules that have to be followed regarding the distribution of your dh assets which can cause lots of problems down the line as for example, if you own your own house and you have children, a part of it can end up in trust for them, leaving you sooner or later without the full value of your house. I am oversimplifying horribly here - but there are some horror stories on mumsnet of people that this has happened to that adds lots of problems at an already incredibly stressful time. so throw together a very simple document and get it signed and witnessed (am sure the nurses will be used to helping with this), do one for yourself at the same time, and then it is one less thing to worry about.

does your dh have any kind of insurance cover or health cover? Often these have to be initiated within a month of the problem starting, if not sooner (crazy, as it is the last thing you need to be worrying about at the time and it is not like you are up to doing much yourself) but if he has, check what the timescales are. guess this particularly applies to your holiday as it is so imminent.

you might find that dh also becomes more susceptible to bugs that he wouldn't have got previously - and lots of over the counter medicines for coughs and colds etc can't be taken with lots of the heart drugs that he might be taking - so it is worth double checking everything with the pharmacist and maybe asking the consultant for names of over the counter drugs that he could take for common conditions, just so you are ready.

it might also be worth getting yourself to the doctor or your midwife to get checked out if you are feeling stressed and worried about the effects this is all having on your pregnancy. they may very say that there is nothing to worry about from your health and baby's health point of view but it will mean that they are aware of the situation and able to keep an eye on you, plus they may well be able to offer some sort of help (practial and/or counselling, extra pg appts etc) and talk through what to expect with your dh and what support services they offer, etc. Remember that you will need support too - not just because you are pg - but because this has big knock on effects on you too, so don't be afraid to accept help.

sorry, this has turned into a really long post. I hope it doesn't read too much like doom and gloom but provides a little practical support at a moment when that is the last thing you want to be thinking of yourself. You are both in a scary place at the moment but you will end up stronger and wiser at the end of it, and you may well find that you all end up healthier and happier too as a result of the changes that you make to your lives.

Big hugs and let us know how your dh gets on. Let me know if you have any more questions and I'll try to answer them.

Rosylily · 30/12/2007 23:20

My dh had a heart attack in the summer age 46. Our baby was 3/4 months old then. It was very shocking. We have adjusted now, it took time to come to terms with it.
You go through stages. i hope you can soon make sense of it. try not to worry, he will be taken care of now and with treatment can avoid a future heart attack.

silkcushion · 30/12/2007 23:32

Disney - have only just seen this. I'm in Gloucester - I don't know if I can be any help at all but let me know if there is something I can do.

disneystar · 31/12/2007 09:07

pollydoodle it was interesting you saying maybe find out if its inherited as is mother died 2 yrs ago with heart failure as did all her brothers all the same thing me and my dh have 3 boys and they were born with crouzons syndrome which was a genetic link on his side his mothers we never knew beforehand onlt when 2 boys were born my 2 sons who are now 7 and 6 both were born with congenital heart disease the oldest one had 3 heart attacks before 7 months he had a double bypass at 10 mths old the 6 yr old charlie is very ill and is tube fed and having his heart op next year they have both had full facial reconstructive surgery they were born without foreheads i know this sound awful but we have managed to cope and live with this syndrome and adjust now my boys go to mainstream school and life was at an even keel hence why we booked the florida trip we dont know how long we have charlie for and it was his wish my dh is saying hes still going he cant bear to not go for charlies sake i know he feels like this but you can see when he talks hes so weak and ill its just words like his body doesnt do what he wants it to right now he sleeps most of the time which is good i feel he so needs to rest now .i always knew so did he that we lived day to day and we always made the best of each day i reckon we thought ten years down the line we might be facing this not yet i guess we put this moment out of our thoughts we had to .even when he was having the heart attack all he kept saying was it isnt what you think its going to be ok i hope and pray they find out it is treatable i can do that so can he i just want him to come home so i can look after him i dont want to be left alone

OP posts:
disneystar · 31/12/2007 09:10

silkcushion i live on the kingsway development of the a38 or some people know it as quedegeley

OP posts:
Rosylily · 31/12/2007 09:27

My dh slept the clock round at first after his heart attack. It took a while to gradually recover from it. He cut me off at the time wanting to cope with it alone which I found confusing and upsetting and I had to work out what was best for him and leave him alone for a while.

Now he is on loads of medication. He has done an excersise programme to learn how to manage his condition and excersise safely. That really helped him. He is really strict about his diet now and takes no salt etc.

You have had alot to go through as a family but it sounds like you pull together and that is worth a lot.

silkcushion · 31/12/2007 14:33

Disney - I live in Hucclecote. I can drive to you if you need anything. Let me know. Even if it something as simple as picking up some food for you or something.
Silk

disneystar · 01/01/2008 07:56

my dh has all tests results back also been on treadmill it was the genetic trait in the family there has been no permenent damage to his heartwhen he was hooked up to monitors his heartbeat keeps going below 40 and setting alarms of this is what they say is happening heart just keeps slowing down to much and stopping hence the crushing pain it was an actual heart attack but hes going to be ok hes on meds they have put him on a strict diet and exercise regime hes very strangely quiet and seems very different to me i guess thats the shock hes been through i want to thank all of you for all your help the last few days without you i dont think id have managed to be able to come on here and see practical advise ppl that have been through it and just plain hellos and well wishes made me cry to read them silkcushion thank you for offering to help as your nearby im much more positive today and ready to look after him if i could give you a giant hug i would all of you silk i would love to meet you sometime soon we are not to far away if you like just to have a chat let me know what you think

OP posts:
silkcushion · 01/01/2008 11:20

Glad the news is good Disney. Let me know yr email and I'll send you my contact details.

josey · 01/01/2008 12:23

Disney glad the test results have been good and you are feeling more positive.
You have had an awful time and I hope things now turn around and you and your family have a very good year together xx

spackcat · 01/01/2008 15:16

Glad to hear there is no permanent damage and he is going to be ok, disney. Really felt for you and tried to imagine myself in your position and that was a very scarey place to be. Thank god he is on the mend and they know how they can treat him, I hope everything now continues to improve for you all and like josey says for you and your family to have a really happy year together. Take care sweetie x

kindersurprise · 01/01/2008 20:28

Good to hear that the tests brought positive results and that your DH is on the mend.

Best wishes for 2008

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