AIBU to never want to go to a midwife appointment

[PurdyPi]

I’m 17 weeks pregnant and have just been turned away from my midwife appointment.
My son tested positive for COVID on Tuesday and I phoned twice to make sure it was ok for me to attend. The receptionist said yes but I should take a LF test, this matches up with the guidance so I did a lateral flow and turned up this morning for my appointment.
When I got there they were totally thrown and greeted me with ‘you shouldn’t be here!’ I said I had phoned completed and lateral flow, when a midwife came out into the waiting room she was really cross and told me I should be self isolating. I kept telling her that that’s not the guidance and that I have to keep taking LF tests she insisted she’d just looked up the guidance and I was wrong to turn up. This was in front of a waiting room full of pregnant women. I had been in school teaching 100s of children this week but couldn’t attend my midwife appointment. I’d totally understand if it was the policy there but it was such a weird turnaround. I feel now like I’d rather risk not seeing a midwife until the birth but I know that is a pretty big over reaction.

I’m sorry you’ve been treated really badly.

I can understand that’s your gut reaction but take a few days, a deep breath and know that you should see them as that’s what is best for your baby.

Write to the surgery and the head of midwifery asking which of them is correct. It is unacceptable for them to give you conflicting advice.

You know deep down you need to see them op, it's just your anger right now and rightly so being told it's fine then turned away infront of everyone.

I think I'd ring tomorrow and find out who is correct and rebook your app.

Is there a different clinic you can transfer to? Or at least a different midwife?

As trained professionals who deal with a lot of hormonal women you'd think they would have a lot more sensitivity! No matter who is right or wrong there is no need to be angry or belittle you in front of other people!

You did the right thing, you followed guidance and even phoned up to ask . I understand why you feel this way, but please do go to your next appointments and don't risk the health of you and your baby because of one cow.

Put a complaint in writing.

Thanks all, will definitely ask to transfer. Bloomin hormones! It’s an absolute rollercoaster isn’t it?! I’ll probably write a strongly worded letter and then not send it, but it does make me wonder if they’re not up on the guidance then what else are they missing? I have so much regard for the NHS but feel so let down, prob do need some time to calm down from it all.

@PurdyPi

Thanks all, will definitely ask to transfer. Bloomin hormones! It’s an absolute rollercoaster isn’t it?! I’ll probably write a strongly worded letter and then not send it, but it does make me wonder if they’re not up on the guidance then what else are they missing? I have so much regard for the NHS but feel so let down, prob do need some time to calm down from it all.

I know it's annoying, OP, but don't bother transferring. It will probably be the same people covering any other local clinics you transfer to. It's just more hassle for you. Keep your upcoming appointments and don't let those idiots get you down. You were in the right on this issue. It does make you worry what other guidance they don't know about though

Honestly theyre useless anyway...specially now around covid..all they care is if you have covid jab... i told mine my pregnancy problems she only cares about the jab and nothing else... any problem i had i just contacted my gp, seen the midwife 1 time, dont even wanna go second time
(But talking about community midwife not the hospital appointments)

It's frustrating to have been given conflicting guidance but you can understand them taking a more cautious approach if you were going to be in the same waiting room as other vulnerable people. Declining further appointments would be cutting off your nose to spite your face.
Try not to let it bother you and just keep prioritising your own and baby's health