How do I cope with pre-natal depression?

[JackieBrown63]

Without going into huge detail, my doctor diagnosed me with pre-natal depression. I was referred to a councillor which I was delighted about but the waiting list is 3-4 months and I am concerned about how my mood/stress will affect my baby. I am due in a month's time and my Dr suggested that my pre-natal could turn into post natal depression and I want to avoid that at all costs. Don't get me wrong we are so excited for this baby - it's the best thing that's happened to us! Life has just been a bit overwhelming and I don't feel like I have anyone to talk to. I've tried meditation, mindfulness books and apps, sleeping/resting, walking, exercise, writing a journal and other strategies to try to cope but it is only ever temporary. Does anyone have any advice for how to calm down for the sake of my baby? I'm a mess right now. Thanks in advance x

Have you contacted your midwife? The ones in my area have a helpline for mental issues and then they can refer you from there.
They are more likely to know what's available than drs in my experience

Elskerdeg - my midwife told me to go to my GP, my GP referred me to triage and triage put me through to a councillor but their waiting list was too long really. I don't really know who else to ask now :S

It’s good to hear that it’s being recognised and you are supported in this. But I know it’s still very hard.

It’s not inevitable that pre natal will lead onto post natal. And your medication options are better afterwards too.

All the work you are doing now will help later - it’s not a quick fix, but rather helps build up thinking patterns (a bit like building muscles).

I know this sounds odd but don’t believe every thought you have - often the thoughts follow the feelings but logically we expect it to be the other way round. If you can get into a practice of taking notice when feelings wash over you, rather than ruminating on the thoughts that follow it will help (in the long run).

Our thoughts will tell us that we feel bad all the time but actually when you pay attention it’s only ever for minutes at a time. Allowing yourself to notice the parts in between and be ok at times is important too,

You could have a look and see if there are any local charities offering support to pregnant women and new mums in the area. I've received all sorts of support from a local charity - I was referred there by the hospital crisis team shortly before my child was born - and I found them so much more help than a counsellor as they know all about pregnancy/motherhood and the specific challenges that can bring.

I'm not sure where you are based - if you're in Scotland like me I'd highly recommend this directory of support services: www.inspiringscotland.org.uk/perinatal-mental-health-services/

I've had a look online and I think that this netmums page seems to have links to other groups throughout the UK
www.netmums.com/local/support-groups
You could try the maternal mental health alliance too - maternalmentalhealthalliance.org/resources/mums-and-families/covid-19-looking-after-your-mental-health-during-pregnancy-and-after-birth/

Just wanted to say, my prenatal depression did turn into postnatal depression but now I'm out the other side (mostly). A baby is a huge change and the sleep deprivation alone is enough to make anyone really really struggle. I'm not saying that will happen to you but be kind to yourself if it does - it's not something to be avoided at all costs. It's a possibility that you might have to deal with and might not and there's actually not that much you can do to change it I don't think. At least you're in a better position than a lot of women to recognise if you need help. You've got a lot going on already and a baby will change everything - hopefully, but not necessarily for the better. I absolutely hated being a mum for the first 4 months - I mean genuinely hated every single moment and I hadn't expected that at all. I wanted a baby so much! It slowly got better and now I love DS more than anything (still but 100% sure about the motherhood thing but worth it on balance!). Once baby is here there's more support available (speak to your health visitor if you're struggling with anything, mental health or otherwise) as they want to make sure you are both safe and well.