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Pregnancy

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Original poster

Medical management missed miscarriage

12 replies

LuckyWithMyLot · 16/01/2022 19:24

I'm sadly experiencing a mmc and am trying to decide how best to manage it. Baby died 2 weeks ago and I've not had any spotting or cramping.
I'm currently 8.5 weeks but baby measures 6 weeks.
I've read a lot of literature suggesting medical management is less painful and more successful the earlier it is done. Many clinics have a cut off of 10 weeks.
My question is, does anyone know if this cut off point refers to the age the baby stopped growing or the age they should be?
Has anyone had medical management at the same stage?

OP posts:

MrsS89K · 17/01/2022 09:57

Hi @LuckyWithMyLot I’m so sorry for your loss. I’m not sure on the answer to your question about a cut off point, as I think it’s different in different areas of the UK.
I have had medical management twice and it was very different both times, despite the missed miscarriage being found at roughly the same gestation

Chanel05 · 17/01/2022 17:15

Sorry for your loss.

I had surgical management and this was the best option for me really. I couldn't face being awake.

Original poster

LuckyWithMyLot · 17/01/2022 21:36

Thank you both.
I'm leaning towards surgery now but don't know how long the waiting list will be. I have my appointment on Thursday so will know more then.
God, I just want to be out of this limbo :(

OP posts:

GirlMama21 · 17/01/2022 21:51

I had an MVA in May last year following my mmc (in 11th week of the pregnancy). The procedure itself is horrific to give you a truthful perspective- I was given gas and air to help with the pain, but I found the recovery to be very quick and easy compared to what you hear with naturally miscarrying or medical management. Hope you make the right choice for yourself x

Original poster

LuckyWithMyLot · 17/01/2022 22:22

@girlmama21 thank you, I really appreciate honest insights.
Do you mind me asking what was the worst part for you? Was it the pain or the fact that you were aware of what was going on?

OP posts:

jackstini · 17/01/2022 22:38

So sorry for your loss

I found out at 12 week scan that growth had stopped at 7 weeks. I gave it 3 weeks to see if anything happened then opted for a D&C

I found it easier to be asleep and whilst waking up and remembering was hard, it was a kind of relief that that stage was over

I did want to go home asap and we had to push for discharge

There was a bit of cramping over the next day or two but not too bad

Thoughts with you

GirlMama21 · 17/01/2022 23:00

[quote LuckyWithMyLot]@girlmama21 thank you, I really appreciate honest insights.
Do you mind me asking what was the worst part for you? Was it the pain or the fact that you were aware of what was going on?[/quote]
I meant horrific as in physically- I was awake while it was being done- because you experience contractions like in labour. Also, despite the local anaesthetic they use to make it less painful when the tools are inserted, you still feel the pressure and it is not comfortable. I found it hell-ish while it was happening, but although it doesn't feel like it when you're experiencing it, it is actually a very quick procedure. I think I was in and out within 20 mins.

The emotional trauma will be there regardless of the method you choose, you are still losing your baby. I remember crying afterwards to my DH, saying I felt so empty. But the physical recovery is much easier because most of the blood loss happens during the procedure as opposed to you bleeding away at home. I bled for 16 days after my op, none of it heavy and spotting towards the end.

I was recommended to have the surgical management as I have a bleeding disorder so a bit unsafe for me to be bleeding away heavily at home. Regardless, I think I would have chosen it because the recovery is quicker and you have less risk of retained tissue. Some women choose natural/medical management only to require surgical management later due to retained tissue. In the end it is your own choice. I think the MVA can also be done under general anaesthetic so you can be asleep, but I wasn't offered this in my local hospital x

Beautyangel1 · 18/01/2022 13:02

@LuckyWithMyLot I'm so sorry you are having to go through this.

I am in a very similar situation. I had my 12 week scan last Friday only to find out the baby is measuring at seven weeks and there were unable to find a heart beat. It's been absolutely devastating.

I have an appointment next Monday to have another scan to confirm and go through my options. Do you know if I have to decide there and then what I want to do or will they send me away and then book me in for another appointment. I'm finding all the waiting around incredibly hard and knowing that baby is still there.

sofakingcool · 18/01/2022 13:05

Hi lovely

I've had two MMC with the need for medical management - both 10 years ago

The first I had a D&C

The second I opted for the pessary

Personally if I was in that sad position again, I would opt for the D&C as I found the pessary very traumatic.

Do what you feel the most comfortable with, I'll be thinking of you Thursday xx

Miller2021 · 18/01/2022 13:52

Earlier this year I had a delayed miscarriage with medical management at 9 weeks. Every woman's body is different and reacts to the drugs involved in different ways - I know people who have had medical management with less trouble than me, but my experience was horrible. A lot of physical pain, very quickly. If, god forbid, I were offered the choice again, I would go for surgery.

Original poster

LuckyWithMyLot · 18/01/2022 15:03

@beautyangel1 I'm so very sorry you're going through the same. As far as I know, you can take as long as you wish to make a decision and they call it "expectant management" while you wait, meaning you may miscarry naturally in that time.

All of these replies are invaluable and thank you all for your kindness.

OP posts:

surprised12 · 18/01/2022 15:08

@LuckyWithMyLot

I'm sadly experiencing a mmc and am trying to decide how best to manage it. Baby died 2 weeks ago and I've not had any spotting or cramping. I'm currently 8.5 weeks but baby measures 6 weeks. I've read a lot of literature suggesting medical management is less painful and more successful the earlier it is done. Many clinics have a cut off of 10 weeks. My question is, does anyone know if this cut off point refers to the age the baby stopped growing or the age they should be? Has anyone had medical management at the same stage?

So sorry that you are going through this. I was 12 weeks when I found out my baby had stopped growing at 7 weeks.

I had to wait 2 weeks before they confirmed it was definitely not viable, and then opted for surgical option. It went really smoothly., although I did still have some bleeding/ clotting afterwards which I didn't expect.

It's sadly really common (which I didn't know when it happened to me) - look after yourself and keep in your mind that you can try again when you are ready xx

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