The talk about contraception following birth

[tudorqueenie]

Hello,
I'm having an elective C section in under two weeks. I'm being asked about my plans for contraception on three occasions (by my haematologist, by my midwife, and then by the GP).
I do not want the Coil. I also do not want anything hormonal. We always used condoms, it's worked for us for 10+ years.
My question is - will they think I'm being stupid? As in, will they want me to consider something else as well?

I've had two babies and each time I've just said that I'll be in touch when I'm ready and that I understand the risks if I don't use contraception (i.e. high fertility after giving birth + sex = could result in another baby!). That's always been the end of it - there shouldn't be any pressure from anyone.

They don’t “let” you do anything.

You make the choices here not them. It’s your body.

If they press the issue tell them that you’ve discussed it already and therefore will not be discussing it yet again with them.

Forgot to say - they shouldn't think you're being stupid. Condoms are very effective if used properly (as you can attest, with 10 years of successful use under your belt).

You can tell them that it's a private matter and you are sorted. If they push you just tell them again that it's private and you don't wish to discuss it. That's what I did.

I honestly wouldn't worry about it! I think they constantly ask because many people think there's a slim chance of getting pregnant so soon or may think sex is still a long way off and then that changes.

In your situation I'd just say your contraception is in hand, you're going back to using condoms as they always worked for you before.

I’ve had two babies quite close together and still it’s never been an issue. I think the conversations around it are generally because so many people genuinely don’t realise how easy it is to conceive very shortly after having just given birth. Once they realise that you understand that, I don’t think they’ll be at all bothered which decision you make.

This time around I’ll be asking for the contraceptive implant ASAP

Nah, don’t worry about this. I’ve told various medical professionals that I was using condoms as contraception over the years and they’ve never said anything judgey about it. One gp helpfully gave me a prescription for the morning after pill so that I’d have one in the cupboard in case a condom broke on us (I wasn’t in the UK, don’t know if a Uk dr would do that).
They might explain options/risk of pregnancy if a condom breaks on you - like I don’t think the morning after pill would be recommended if you’re breastfeeding but breastfeeding delays the return of your menstrual cycle for the first few weeks/months anyway (it varies a lot from women to women how long this works for).

You'll be fine. I said the same - we used condoms for 13 years, no accidents. Stopped using them, got pregnant within a few months, will go back to them.

Thank you so, so much everyone. This really helped put my mind at ease. Thank you!

I've been asked with the emphasis being on the risks of getting pregnant soon after a C-section. There will be people who got pregnant soon after a C-section with no issues, but it's not ideal and it would be remiss of medical staff not to advise you about contraception. Then you do what works for you, I'm also not planning on using hormonal contraception.

Feeling the same OP. Not been asked about contraception yet but I'm dreading it. I was on the coil before (non hormonal) and it was great at first but then came the heavy, painful periods. Wasn't too bad in lock down when I could wear pjs and be as miserable as I liked all day but it was hell when I was still in the office and had to pretend like I wasn't in agony/ worried that I'd leave a red smear on any chair I sat on. Had it removed in December and decided to go condoms/ natural method and it worked perfectly until we decided to get pregnant in March - and got a positive test in April.

I know that if I say I want natural family planning with condoms for fertile days again, I'll probably meet resistance from medical staff who probably see accidents all the time, but that (hopefully) won't be me!

So right with you on being anxious about asking!

At the chat I just said I didn’t want any hormonal methods as I wanted my hormones to settle down on their own. Also did not want the coil.

Though I had to repeat this to a few different people it was easily accepted by those asking.

No, they won’t think you’re stupid. They just want to ensure you are aware you can be fertile very quickly after having a baby and that you’ve considered what contraception you might use. They will not be in the least concerned about wanting you to consider something else if condoms work for you.

But also - so what even if they did think you were stupid! Who cares!! Why are we always so concerned about other people’s opinions!

Very true!

I've always said we just use condoms and that was fine, no further conversation. It's a basically a box they need to "tick" that they've spoken to you about it.

I tell them mine are IVF babies and I certainly won't be using any contraception. I think the look on my face communicates that it would be inappropriate to continue such a conversation with me.