Maternity leave at 30 weeks

[coffeewithmilk]

I'm 30 weeks and increasingly stressed at work. I'm not due to start my paid maternity leave until I am 38 weeks but I honestly don't think I can continue working as it is having a detrimental effect on me and my baby due to stress. The days I'm most stressed I feel baby move less so it's definitely affecting him.

I feel bad going on sick leave at 30 weeks.. I feel like I've somewhat failed because most people make it to 36-38 weeks before going off.

Just want some reassurance I suppose.
Thank you x

Go off when it works for you. The reason most people work until 36-38 weeks isn’t because they’re coping better it’s because they want to maximise time with the baby afterwards. I really struggled through the last weeks until my maternity leave started at 37 weeks but it’s because I didn’t want to take too much time before baby arrived. I was tired, stressed and if work had a more generous maternity leave I would have gone sooner. If you don’t want to start your maternity leave but have some annual leave, use your annual leave to do some 3/4 day weeks to reduce the stress a little bit.

You need to do what's right for you not what "other people do" (a good rule in parenting in general). everyone is different and everyone's pregnancy and related symptoms are different.

Just remember that if you're off for pregnancy related sickness in the 4 weeks before your due date it will trigger your mat leave so it will start your mat leave at 36 weeks.

You can also start mat leave from 29 weeks but obv that means less time with baby afterwards

@coffeewithmilk don’t feel bad. I’ve planned to go on maternity at 32 weeks due to the type of job I’m in. You do what’s best for you & baby, it doesn’t matter what anybody else does!

Hope your ok OP.

If you do get signed off make sure the doctor note states work related stress- otherwise like a PP said if the note mentions anything to do with pregnancy they will auto trigger Mat leave to start from 36 weeks.

I’m currently 30 weeks and really feeling it now. I have 3 weeks left and it can’t come soon enough - you get no prizes for soldiering on.

I'm planning to start mine at 33 weeks, I'm only 15 weeks but already don't think I want to stay working until I'm ready to pop. Yes I know it's less time after baby arrives, but I also want some time before. And using holiday will stretch it out a bit too.

Don't feel bad about it, as PP said there are no prizes for sucking it up longer. If you want to start mat leave earlier instead of going on sick leave (depending on your company's sick policy I guess) then just have a chat with HR as they might be happy to bring your leave forward if they realise it's either that or you go off sick.

I'm in a WFH office chair all day type job so I'm taking mat leave at 38+4. However if there was any commuting time, being on my feet during the day or labour of any sort there is not a chance on this earth I'd manage!

I started mat leave at 39 weeks, but work ensured I didn't have anything stressful on, the last few weeks were just tying things up and I had an easy pregnancy. Forget what others do, it's what is best for you and your baby. If I was in your position, I'd have gone alot earlier!

Im a reception teacher. It's full on, constant, I spend a lot of time sitting on the floor with the kids. Im quite frankly shattered at 26weeks but decided to keep going until 36/37 but im having a planned section at 38w.

I'm 30 weeks in a fully WFH home job and most days I think about asking the doctor to sign me off till I start mat leave (I'm due to go off at 36 weeks already). I've used my remaining leave to shorten my work weeks to 2/3 days a week, but I am finding I it such a struggle to be productive when I'm meant to be working. I have a meeting with my manager later and I'm worried about him asking what I've been doing as the answer is not a lot!

What has helped me is creating a countdown of working days till I start mat leave - it makes it feel more manageable. However, honestly if you are stressed speak to your doctor they can help you!

Don't feel bad op; you have to do what's right for you and baby. I saved up annual leave and added it to bank holidays and went on maternity leave just short of 33 weeks (36.2 weeks official maternity leave). It was the best decision I've ever made and if I'm honest i wish i 'd have gone off sooner as ended upnot returning to the job (they had caused me so much pregnancy stress during my pregnancyand an unhealthy atmosphere)! Stress isn't worth risking your health for and specially not baby's. It's funny you won't remember the extra couple of weeks you worked when baby born but you'll remember you're maternity leave vividly.

especially *

your* sorry that was my first dc and my now second dc is trying to get my phone!

I’ve just started mine at 33 weeks. No guilt, no regrets. I have gestational hypertension and baby’s growth had reduced between growth scans. I need my feet up, plus I want some time with DD before baby comes and some time to myself! Do not worry what anyone else is doing or what anyone thinks. You have to do what’s right for you! There will be no medal for soldiering on.

Also you never know when baby will arrive, i know somebody who worked until 37 weeks and baby arrived the next day narrowly avoided the office and she got no maternity leave. You can't predict birth dates or set plans in stone that's for sure!

I finished up at 33 weeks, then used a month worth of holidays and then started maternity. I had a physical job where I was having to bend over constantly.

I was constantly crying near the end of work as it was so difficult to move, it all makes sense now as at the time I never knew my baby was already about 7/8lb 🙈

Thank you everyone for your input and being so supportive.
My plan is to use sick leave and AL for the month of December and then start my ML in January. It makes it a bit better knowing that it's really only approx 6ish weeks I'm going off early.
Thanks again xx

That's very sensible. Have lots of pamper sessions and enjoy every moment op x

I joined an aqua natal group when I started mat leave. It was a lovely way to keep gently active in last few weeks of pregnancy, while also meeting other mums to be.
Maybe consider something similar? It would be good to get out of the house regularly and to make the most of the time pre-baby.

I went on annual leave at 36 weeks and mat leave started at 40 weeks. Baby didn't arrive until 42+2 so was off for 6 weeks with no baby in sight twiddling my thumbs. It got a bit boring and in hindsight I would have stayed at work for longer if I could have done - couldn't carry over any more leave so was forced into taking my whole allowance. Plus my job allowed me to wfh so I didn't have to travel or do anything manual.

You never know what will happen so if you feel you need to leave just leave.

I took maternity leave at 33 weeks on my last as I was so stressed with work . I didn’t take sick leave just took a weeks holidays then started Mat leave . No regrets , so what’s best for you (especially if you can afford to stay off on unpaid leave to prolong your leave with the baby ). This time I’m in a different company , WFH at a desk and way less stress so planing on going around 37 weeks .