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Original poster

Fired the day after telling co worker I'm pregnant

87 replies

Tokyo21 · 16/11/2021 17:57

I just got fired today from my new job that I started in mid October. Yesterday at the end of my shift a co worker after me if I am pregnant, at first I told her to mind her business but she kept pressuring me so I said yes I am. She also asked how far along I am and I told her the truth ( that I'm 23 weeks.)
Today after being at work for less than 5 minutes, I got pulled by my boss to his office. He didn't waste any time in telling me that he 'has to let me go'. His reasoning behind this was that I breeched my contract by being in possession of my mobile phone during work. Last week he saw that I had my phone on me during work hours so he pulled me for a talk in his office. He said that if he sees my phone on me again, I will be sent home for the day and not paid the remaining hours of my shift. He also mentioned that he wants me to come into work on January 9th to help take down the Christmas decorations.(this may seem irrelevant info but its not!)
In today's meeting where he fired me, he said that he was 'not happy with the way things were going,' and that he was 'even going to fire me last week when we had that conversation about the phone' he also said that he 'regrets not firing me last week, and was second guessing whether he made the right choice or not.' This does not seem coherent considering how he discussed plans for JANUARY so if he really wanted to fire me last week, why make future plans with me? Also, I haven't been caught using my mobile phone at work since that conversation last week so it makes even less sense.
I left his office barely saying a word, I didn't want to let him see me emotional so all I said was 'okay cool.' No expression. No emotion. Nothing. He also told me that because I have worked there for over a month, he has to give me 1 weeks notice where I get paid. He told me 'you don't have to come in for this week Ill just pay you anyway,' which I found strange considering the last guy who got fired came in to work for the following week. This made me feel like he felt bad for me in some way, perhaps guilty, reaffirming my belief that he did not fire me because of mobile phone usage because if that was truly the case, why would you feel bad for me?
Rant over! I was working as a waitress in a restaurant for context. A four star restaurant in central London. I feel frustrated because although I truly believe he fired me after finding out I am pregnant, I have no evidence or proof. What am I meant to do? Just move and get a new job. It doesn't feel right when what he did to me is illegal. I know that I probably have no grounds for a legal case, but part of me wants to expose the business and my employer.

OP posts:
Original poster
Tokyo21 · 16/11/2021 17:59

by the way, in case its not obvious, I never told my boss that I was pregnant. I was planning on telling him today (after my co-worker finding out) I figured I should tell him although I never got a chance...

OP posts:
DelphiniumBlue · 16/11/2021 18:05

I think you may well have grounds for an unfair dismissal, and as you are pregnant,I think the onus may be on your employer to prove that the dismissal was fair.

But it is years since I went into any detail about the law on this, call ACAS for up to date, specific advice.

GinUnicorn · 16/11/2021 18:07

Unfortunately it does sound like that’s the case but proving this could be a tough battle and the short amount of time you were there plus having a warning might not put you in the best position.

So sorry though.

minipie · 16/11/2021 18:09

Honestly? I think you’re probably right and it’s the pregnancy. How shitty.

You might well have grounds for a legal case but these claims are stressful and uncertain, which may be not what you want right now.

However you could look at using the ACAS “early conciliation” service which is free and less formal than making a tribunal claim. I don’t know much about it but the link is here tell.acas.org.uk/check-user-wants-conciliation

The ACAS website is very helpful generally.

AlfonsoTheUnrepentant · 16/11/2021 18:24

You were there approximately three weeks when you received a warning for using your mobile phone at work. You say Also, I haven't been caught using my mobile phone at work since that conversation last week so it makes even less sense. This makes it sound as though, yes, you have been using your phone but you think you haven't been seen.

You don't have any proof that your co-worker told your former line manager that you were pregnant. And you can't compare your sacking with the previous person being sacked because you don't know the details of that particular case.

user14943608381 · 16/11/2021 18:25

I’d be pretty confident that it’s due to you being pregnant.

Do you have a contract, what does it say around dismissals?

I don’t know about the hospitality industry at all for things like this but in most office environments you can’t really be dismissed on the spot. Also the fact he said the next time you are caught with your phone you’ll be sent home… well you weren’t, he just randomly sacked you and used the phone as an excuse. I’m not sure how you prove this though, I’d definitely give acas a call xx

needabreak5 · 16/11/2021 18:26

When you say you haven't been caught using your mobile phone is there a chance you could have been seen but not caught?

I think you may be right but not sure if there is anyway to prove it unless you had your co-worker on your side?

Original poster
Tokyo21 · 16/11/2021 18:32

@needabreak5 @AlfonsoTheUnrepentant No, there isn't a chance I was seen on my phone because I left it in my locker everyday since that conversation. I understand why you may think that bcos saying 'caught' sounds like I thought I was being sneaky, but no, that's not the case here.

OP posts:
elbea · 16/11/2021 18:36

I had a similar thing happened, used ACAS Early Conciliation and achieved a settlement quite easily.

Pregnant and Screwed is also a great help.

Original poster
Tokyo21 · 16/11/2021 18:38

@elbea thanks I''m gonna look into this. Did you have any proof for your claim tho? bcos even tho I feel in my head and heart that I've been discriminated against, I also have no proof:(

OP posts:
Hollyhocksarenotmessy · 16/11/2021 18:38

I'd do a subject access request and see if there are any emails/messages or texts where your company was informed you were pregnant. They have 30 days to provide this, so do it ASAP so you still have time to get an ET discrimination claim in - would be good evidence.

savemejebus · 16/11/2021 18:39

@Tokyo21 sorry to ask but you're not in the midlands are you? (EXACT same thing happened to me, even down to some of the things you've said they've said to you....)

IncompleteSenten · 16/11/2021 18:42

He fired you but he wants you to come in and take decs down in January? I hope you told him to go fuck himself.

I bet it is because you're pregnant but you'll never prove it.

minipie · 16/11/2021 18:52

You don’t have to have concrete proof to win a claim
You just have to persuade the tribunal that your claim is “more likely than not” to be true, ie in this case that it’s more likely than not that you were fired due to being pregnant
And even if it was due to phone, he hasn’t followed the right procedures to fire you
Speak to ACAS

Puddington · 16/11/2021 18:56

@IncompleteSenten

He fired you but he wants you to come in and take decs down in January? I hope you told him to go fuck himself.

I bet it is because you're pregnant but you'll never prove it.

Just to clarify he asked her to come in and help with decorations in a previous meeting, before she was fired.
Original poster
Tokyo21 · 16/11/2021 18:59

@savemejebus no, I'm in London. sorry to hear that happened to you, people really do suck sometimes.

OP posts:
Pitavina · 16/11/2021 19:00

Pregnant and screwed is a charity that runs a helpline for people in your position. Give them a call for some free advice.

Forgetmenot37 · 16/11/2021 19:00

Have a look at Pregnant and Screwed - they might be able to help x

Forgetmenot37 · 16/11/2021 19:00

Haha snap @Pitavina Grin at exactly the same time!

IncompleteSenten · 16/11/2021 19:04

Ah, right. Thanks.
I read it wrongly then. I was gobsmacked!

savemejebus · 16/11/2021 19:12

@Tokyo21 ah ok. Yeah it's shocking this still happens. I second (or third) pregnant and screwed. I went all the way to tribunal (settled 3 days before we were due to go to court) Hmm these employers really need to realise this is not ok. Best of luck, my love x

Tina8800 · 16/11/2021 21:17

I'm so sorry. He clearly let you go becouse of the pregnancy, especially as you won't be able to work around the busy Christmas time.
Can I ask why you didn't tell him you are pregnant? I know legally you don't have to before 26 weeks, but as a waitress ( I was for 10 years too) I belive you should of let him know earlier (make sure you don't do too heavy or physical work- not just for the safety of you and the baby but also the place where you work) and they also need to plan the work hours of the staff ahead.
(On paper) he didn't know you were pregnant when he fired you (even though it's clear he did) so unfortunately I don't think there is anything you can do about it.

Toohardtofindaproperusername · 16/11/2021 21:28

don't put too much heart and soult into being able to prove it. But if you have any energy, just start getting advice, following it, setting out your stall, and making sure you can give them a sense of your confidence. ie .. don't talk to anyone about doubts. Does your colleague who you suspect passed on the message, have any relationship with the boss outisde of work, or has he or she been there a long time - just think about that relationship so you can use it in evidence.
take care - folllw advice - ignore people who are suggesting your ordinary language about 'being caught' using the phone is somehow evidence of it being ok that you have been sacked.
Sorry OP. it's shit thing to do to women, and a shit thing to do to a colleague. i really hope that your advice is helfpul. misogyny is alive and kicking... it's a shitty thing to do

if i was you, i'd try and get hold of the person's mobile number who you told you were pregnant, and i'd send a text making note of the convefsagion you had about yoru pregnancy - just something that means it's on record.

i'd be fuming and i'd want to make them wriggle a bit, even if i thought it unlikely i'd have much chance of proving it. i wouldn't want them to know that.

Bxxxxds

SaraKitty · 16/11/2021 21:34

So he has fired you on the grounds of gross misconduct but the fact that he gave you a verbal warning the week before and you didn’t do anything wrong since that makes me think you have a case for unfair dismissal . Did you have a probation period ?

Mybalconyiscracking · 16/11/2021 21:37

Why not name and shame the restaurant OP, they deserve it.

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