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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

Maternity leave - should I keep DD in nursery?

13 replies

derah · 12/12/2007 09:10

A quick question for those of you with 2+ DCs....

I start meternity leave at the end of Jan, at 35 weeks. At the moment I work 3 full days a week and DD (2.3) goes to nursery on site.

The big question is whether I should keep her in nursery 2 days a week once I go on maternity leave? I reckon I could probably use a couple of days a week to relax without a rampaging toddler to chase at the end of my pregnancy. But, work (and the nursery) is a good half-hour drive away, and that's if the traffic is good, and I'd have to turn around after dropping her off and drive straight home again! So realistically, I'd be spending 2-3 hours each day in traffic just for a bit of peace and quiet! Not to mention the fact that it would cost money, of course!

So, for those of you who had a rampaging toddler in the house at the end of your pregnancy, what would you have done, looking back? Will I be too shattered with her at home full time or would the drive and expense probably not be worth it?

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nailpolish · 12/12/2007 09:12

id keep going with it and see how it pans out. i kept my dd1 at her nursery one day a week. i really looked forward to that day if im honest with you. but the nursery wasnt far - ws walking distance

if you keep it on you can always change your mind

hth

JackieNoel · 12/12/2007 09:13

Have to say, I really welcomed the time to be with the new baby on our own sometimes. And I felt it was good for DD to continue in her routine. But you've got a much longer drive than I had, so I'm not sure whether that would outweigh the benefits.

Anna8888 · 12/12/2007 09:15

Why don't you spend the money you would spend on nursery/petrol on getting someone in to the house to help you out? A part-time nanny, or babysitter, or cleaner or whatever?

The drive to nursery at the end of maternity leave or with a small baby will be a nightmare and outweigh any benefits to you of a restful day without a toddler IMO.

Original poster

derah · 12/12/2007 09:18

Thanks for the quick input!

Thing is that DD is (hopefully) starting at the local playgroup a month after new baby is born, so I'll get a little bit more peace then . But I have to give the nursery a month's notice of any changes so I can't really just leave it and see how it goes. As I'm sure you all know, nurseries are flippin' expensive, and we're not exactly rolling in cash so DH would flip if we ended up paying for a nursery place we weren't using!

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Original poster

derah · 12/12/2007 09:18

Oooh, Anna, good idea! Now to get DH to agree......

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morningpaper · 12/12/2007 09:20

I kept mine in - I think it's important that she had routine with familiar people who weren't lying on the sofa moaning

Bear in mind that your home journey is likely to be quite quick - ten minutes make a huge difference in rush hour traffic!

nailpolish · 12/12/2007 09:22

oh god i cant think of anything worse than having a stranger in the house like a nanny while im trying to settle with my newborn

what about a childminder? there might be one round the corner - and when dd goes to playgroup the cm might take her and collect her

JingleBelgoHoHoHo · 12/12/2007 09:22

yes keep her in nursery a couple of days a weeks.

If she leaves nursery for a few weeks/months, it will be quite a big shock for her to go back once the new baby is born.

JingleBelgoHoHoHo · 12/12/2007 09:23

a cleaner is a good idea though

Anna8888 · 12/12/2007 09:24

I should think you could find some pretty convincing arguments for your DH:

cost neutral (providing you don't spend more on help than on three days of nursery + petrol - but that's quite a lot of money)

you gain a lot of time when you can be resting/recovering

he will have far fewer chores to do to help you out as you will have help at home (v good argument IMO)

morningpaper · 12/12/2007 09:28

I am not sure that a cleaner will compensate for the mess caused by a 2 year old being at home all day!!

TBH I think it is a bit unfair to take away from her routine and friends when she is about to undergo such a huge life-change

And you WILL be shouty-knackered mummy for a while

I think it is good for them to continue with the familiar environment of nursery during this time - particularly if she might return there at some point anyway

JingleBelgoHoHoHo · 12/12/2007 10:03

that's true morning paper. if she's used to going to the nursery three days a week it will be quite a shock to her and you to keep her home all week. It takes a lot of energy and thought to occupy kids this age - and you will be tired being pregnant/ having a new baby. Keep her in two days a week, (and get a cleaner if you can afford to as well!)

Original poster

derah · 12/12/2007 10:19

Good arguments all round.

DD won't be going back to that nursery again, cos I don't plan on going back to work (but don't tell my boss!!). If the nursery were near home it would be a no-brainer, but it is quite a long haul. I also don't want to find her a CM etc for such a short time.... it would only be 2 months and then she starts preschool. I was kinda thinking of just invading every toddler group in the area instead!

I'd love her to stay with her routine and her friends.... the nursery is in a Portakabin anyway, maybe I can just move it closer to home!

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