Hating being pregnant

[bethabean]

Hello! Not sure what I want from this, maybe just a rant. For context I am 28 weeks pregnant.
I really don't want this to come across the wrong way as I am happy to be having my little girl and know how lucky I am but I am hating being pregnant so much and not sure how to cope much more.
I am so fed up of not being able to move properly, it's so frustrating. I can't sit down, stand up, roll over or walk for long without it feeling like an Olympic challenge. My nipples constantly leak, I feel fat, I have awful acid reflux, I feel sick, I have no patience, cry every day and my ribs/stomach/back always hurt. She's so low down and the kicks to what I assume is my cervix and bladder are awful. My skin is dry and itchy and I just can't bear it! I feel like I have completely lost who I am.
Sorry this is me complaining lots and a bit of a pity party but I am so done with it and there is a part of which worries that I might resent my baby for feeling like this The thought of 12 weeks longer is a bad one! I almost feel guilty for not enjoying it as everyone says to cherish it but I really don't feel like I can anymore.

Oh and to top it off it feels like I've been kicked in between the upper thigh by a horse (or 4)

I used to go swimming a lot when pregnant and it made me feel weightless!
Can you try it op? You are 2/3 of the way there, the weeks will fly by.

Honestly sometimes pregnancy is a dream and sometimes it’s a nightmare, it won’t have any effect on your feelings towards your daughter.
Pregnancy with my boy was a dream, I had loads of energy, I was glowing, tiny bump.
Pregnant now with my girl and it’s been 20 weeks of vomiting, sleeping and being itchy and uncomfortable, I’m a mess.
Just take it a day at time

This too shall pass op. Not helpful at the moment I know.
It does sound like you are suffering with SPD though. You can get physio for that. Also support belts.
Hang on in there. It’s worth it I absolutely promise x

I doubt you will resent your baby because of being fed up while pg.

also bear in mind that for a lot of people seeing their newborn is far from love at sight! so if you do end up in that group and don't feel you love your baby immediately that just means you are one amongst many mothers!
it might take weeks but the love will come.
or you might be so relieved that when she does show, finally, you will be head over heels in love!😁

I'm sorry you are struggling.
some pregnancies are a total shit show.
you probably don't want to hear a long list of scare stories so I shall not fall into my own trap.
but please believe me, however hard it is for you right now, it could be so much worse and so far you've been lucky with totally normal and relatively minor problems.

do you use anything for your itchy skin? there are ways to ease that and also the acid reflux. talk to your GP or MW.

12 weeks left...you can and you will do it.

Thank you everyone for your replies. I know I'm lucky because some women have horrendous pregnancies and my issues are all normal, it's just so much and I think pregnancy can be portrayed as wonderful, glamorous and amazing but it really isn't! I really appreciate all your advice and kind words. Also @Clementineapples I hope you get some relief soon

@Forgothowmuchlhatehomeschoolin
I will try swimming! It might relieve some of the pressure actually

@ZingDramaQueenOfSheeba
I use moisturiser on my skin but doesn't seem to do anythingI will speak to my midwife at my appointment tomorrow.

you could try having a bath with soaked oats, it's can be very soothing for itchy skin - just fill a sock with a handful of plain porridge oats, attach it to the tap so the warm water can run through it, squeeze it a few times.

I know that others suffering more doesn't diminish how bad it is for you, I hope you know I didn't mean it that way.
Perhaps reciting "when the going gets tough the tough gets going" will get you through the worst spots?
Maybe you can rationalise it that pg is just the dry rehearsal for being a parent?😉😁

Would watching your favourite comedy shows help to distract you and lift your mood? Scrubs, Frasier, Friends, The Office (both UK & US), The Mindy project, Parks & Rec etc are shows I go back to time & time again.

Or you could try a small crafting project? embroidery is great, stabbing fabric with a needle repeatedly can certainly relieve some tension!🤣
Take painkillers for pain, ask for anti emetics if sickness is bad.

I do feel for you. I hope tomorrow is easier x

I was in agony for weeks with pelvic girdle pain and in the end i had a few sessions with a private physio and she really sorted me out. The NHS physio wasn't great at all. For the reflux , your Dr can prescribe you medications for it which should definitely help.

physio is a good shout. I had many sessions with my osteopath during my pgs for various issues.

I was miserable when I was pregnant. HG, food aversions, brutal insomnia and crippling prenatal anxiety did not make it a good time. I didn't bond with DS at all when he was still in utero, but as soon as we didn't have to share a body, we got on really well .

Also, an upside of a shit pregnancy was that I felt AMAZING after my ELCS. More alive and energetic than I'd been in the previous 40 weeks, it was fab. I also slept much better when DS was a newborn because the sleep I got between feeds was actual quality sleep, not weird pregnancy half-sleep.

You could be describing my pregnancy with DS. I also had dysgeusia throughout which made everything I ate and drank taste of vomit. Was so done with it all that I took maternity leave from the earliest point possible at 29 weeks and hibernated until he was born

Honestly don't worry about it affecting your relationship with your little girl; if you're anything like me you'll just be so glad not to be pregnant anymore that dealing with a newborn feels like floating on a cloud by comparison!

@GiltEdges It has a name?! Everything I ate or drank tasted like mould. I didn't realize it was a thing - thought it was a pregnancy quirk.

Ah, yes I was the grumpiest pregnant woman in the world! No actual issues to speak of but the whole general state pissed me off, I’m convinced now I just don’t do well with hormonal fluctuations (I get PMT and don’t do brilliantly on the contraceptive pill). I distinctly remember walking around a fete with DP and him jollying me along talking about how lovely it was and I growled that it was probably more fun without someone’s head lodged in your pelvis (I was pretty overdue by then tbf).

Made absolutely no difference to how I felt about my actual baby or our bond afterwards - I just don’t like growing ‘em

How itchy are you feeling? Its worth mentioning it to your midwife or doctor, just to rule out obstetric cholestasis.

I know the feeling. This is such a miracle pregnancy as we were told that we'd never conceive naturally cos of my husbands cancer. Then boom I'm 7 weeks along with twins, then we lose one of them. The whole pregnancy been OK except hating all the anxiety and the exhaustion. I just can't shake it.

Then two weeks ago developed severe diabetes. Doctors telling me I had it before I was pregnant though there were zero signs of it in my urine or scans til two weeks ago. So my food I really restricted and lots of injeftions. I'm also at much higher risk of covid so I don't want to go anywhere indoors and I feel like I'm constantly stuck at home.

So fed up and now dreading being stuck at home during the newborn stage too. I hate this

I thought I would love being pregnant as it took so long to get to this point.
But...
Having HG throughout and being on meds has been rubbish. I lost tons of weight in the first few weeks as I literally couldnt eat a thing. The tiredness was a killer and I spent all of the first trimester and half of the second trimester hating life.
Things improved and I was on a winner for the second part of the 2nd trimester.
Until pelvic girdle pain hit, sickness and all day nausea returned. Exhausted. Constant pain. Carpal tunnel. Headaches. Reflux.

Its not been fun and honestly, Im so over carrying the baby now. Hopefully once baby is born these symptoms will go and I will feel human again!
Not long to go for you though, you can do this!

I was miserable when pregnant with DD, and I’m 9 weeks pregnant now and miserable again.
I remember getting to 30 weeks and just thinking “I can’t, I just can’t” it seemed like such a long time left.
It can really suck, and what’s more, there’s not much that can be done about it. Rest more, medicate the acid reflux, get a body pillow, they only help so much I think.
But it does end! It’s 8 weeks to Christmas so focus on that, and then once Christmas and new year are out of the way you’ll only have about three weeks left? Don’t think about 12 weeks.

22weeks and feel like I've been steel capped ten times in the crotch. Hurts to stand, walk, turn over. Add an extra dose of thrush on top and my vag is set to self-combust. I've mentally killed my husband about eleventy million times and my kids shouting mummmm all the time makes me seriously crabby. The dog loves me though!

32 weeks and I feel like the women of the world kept this big secret about how awful being pregnant actually is 😂 For the pelvic pain get to a physio ASAP, it sorted me out.

OP I was exactly the same with all my pregnancies and with the last one I had insomnia so was up till at least 4am every night, and started work at 7.30 every day could hardly move but moving is essential for my job (childminder) I was so ill, and on medication that made made me so tired for it, yet still couldn't sleep.
Pregnancy is fucking awful and I was so depressed the last time I genuinely used to think about taking my own life.
Shes 9 months now and that 9 months has flown by company pregnancy. It feels like you won't get through it but you will.

Also approaching 28 weeks and not loving pregnancy so far, and experiencing insomnia, pelvic pain and tiredness and very much looking forward to putting the next 12 weeks behind me. You are not the only one OP!
If you've tried gaviscon or rennies for reflux then ask a pharmacist about trying some omperazole to see if it helps. I am also making sure I book in some treats to look forward to over the next few weeks to keep myself going, so getting my nails done, ordering in a posher than average takeaway, getting some pampering hair products in.
I'm also making sure I have a long relaxing bath at least once a week and just generally going easy on myself.
We can do this!

I'm a few weeks behind you OP but couldve written your post.

I feel so useless. There's loads to do (we are in the middle of house renovations, living the Grand Designs pregnant cliche) but I even need DH to take my boots off for me so I can't do much else.

The itching, the aching, the acid reflux. Its certainly not the most fun period of my life thus far.

I so could have written this myself.
Pregnancy with my son 8 years ago was a dream!
I’m now 31+3 with my second boy and my god don’t I know it.
I’ve been bed ridden the whole way through and the ONLY times I leave the house are appointments only at the hospital (scans & diabetic team)
My midwife visits my house instead of me going there, my husband and cousin share school runs for me because I physically cannot do it.
I’ve got gestational diabetes, polyhydrominos and for now a breech baby which kicks me in the bladder which hurts and makes me uncomfortable.
I have to lay down, I cannot sit because my back hurts which takes my breath away, my bump hurts, I just can’t sit still I get shooting pains if I sit up, hot sweats. I can’t even bath without being sick.

I hate pregnancy but I love my baby. And it’s okay to feel that way
I also suffer acid reflux terribly I ended up getting omeprozole from my GP and I haven’t suffered in weeks (just don’t forget to take one)
I feel like a bad mum because I haven’t been able to do anything with my 8 year old at all, it’s been boring for him a lot of the time when dh is at work. Feel free to message me xx

I feel your pain OP! I’m 27+4 and feeling exactly the same!

Definitely go to your doctors for the acid reflux, I’ve been taking Omeprazole and it’s honestly changed my life. Same for the itchy skin too - mine ended up being a yeast infection which has now started to get less red and itchy.

You’ve not got long to go now OP! I hope you’re being kind to yourself.

Argh I remember feeling this way, it was awful. Definitely mention the itchy skin to your midwife, just in case. Things that helped me were swimming, having half a beer or small glass on wine on a Friday (not for everyone I know but it helped me), completely giving myself a break every possible time. For example, sleeping whenever I needed to. Eating whatever I felt like, whenever. Driving even short distances if I felt tired. Not going to things or doing things if I didn't fancy it.

After the baby was born (it was incredible by the way, not liking pregnancy was totally separate to her) being free of the weight and discomfort was amazing! You will feel like yourself again