Pregnancy Anxiety - reassurance and is this normal?!

[Mumtotwofurbabies]

I suppose I’m posting this just to get it written down, and for people to talk me down and tell me I’m being silly. After two early miscarriages I’m now pregnant again, 32 weeks and everything going great, can feel her kicking away as I speak. However I can’t shake the anxiety and sense of doom that this isn’t going to end well. I was always trying to get to the next milestone, 12 week scan, 20 week scan and thought I would feel better after that…but the anxieties keep coming up. Sounds silly but for the last week I’ve been fixated on the following scenario - I’m due to have a elective c section at 39 weeks and I keep thinking they will get the baby out and it won’t breathe or cry and will need special care or resuscitation…just fixated on this happening and keep going over it. Before this the worry was around preeclampsia and the baby having to be delivered early as I’m at risk for that. I guess once I get past one milestone another worry overtakes it! Just need reassurance that the latest c section worry is ridiculous 😂, and strategies for coping with anxiety as it’s going to be a long few weeks otherwise. I remember with my first born, even when I went through an EMCS as her heart rate was dropping I was pretty chilled and it never occurred to me anything would really go wrong, also loved pregnancy. Maybe it’s the miscarriages that have done this to me, but they were only early ones. Anyone else like this? How do you stop being anxious? Have mentioned it at each midwife appointment but they seem to just shrug it off. Writing all that down has actually helped a bit…makes me realise how silly I sound 🙈

One of the worst things I’ve found about being pregnant after multiple miscarriages is the horrible underlying anxiety; you’re definitely not alone in that. My first three months were hell, I honestly felt crippled by it trying to get through each day from scan to scan. And then I felt movements very late so was again convinced something was wrong many times and saw my midwife who thankfully has been amazing. I’m due in 10 days and am really working hard to stay up beat and positive. I’m visualising my baby, cuddling her, holding her and thinking about what she’ll look like. At the first sign of a negative intrusive thought I’m trying to steer myself away and distract myself. Have you tried listening to any meditation tracks or similar? Honestly there’s no quick fix. It’s a horrible hangover from the losses. I wish you all the luck in the world, one midwife said to me until I’m holding my baby in my arms that worry will never really go away completely.

I was the same after one MC. The anxiety didn't go away until I held her in my arms. I found it helpful speaking to my midwife and she referred me to my GP to talk things thru. She told me I was the sanest person she'd spoken to throughout lockdown 😂 it's totally normal to feel this way but just try and keep it in check, it'd be a shame to not enjoy being pregnant. I regret that a bit. Sending hugs x

Also, at the first sign of feeling something isn't right ring your pregnancy assessment unit. I went twice during my last trimester and they were so understanding. Always best to be checked. X

Thank you both 😘, glad to hear I’m not the only one! Thankfully movements have been great so far so that’s one thing I’m grateful for. I haven’t tried meditation stuff but keep meaning to! Reading books helps a lot as takes my mind off things. I know what you mean about the intrusive thoughts, I’m not very good at nipping them in the bud so tend to spiral over a few days. People keep asking if I’m excited and saying not long now, but starting to hate those comments (although pretend to be happy!) maybe I need to start trying to capture some of that excitement