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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Abortion at 11 weeks

3 replies

CRA95 · 23/10/2021 12:57

I’m just wondering what people’s opinions are on my current situation. I have been in a relationship with my current partner for over 1 year and we found out I was pregnant 2 months ago, this was unplanned however we were both happy and I have always wanted to be a mum, however this wasn’t my plan just yet. I have also been having doubts about the relationship due to him having depression and anxiety and using cannabis to cope (he is seeking pro help but isn’t engaging very well with it) his mood swings can be really upsetting for me. He has been offered a job working abroad and really wants to go, he says he’ll come back before the baby is born but I feel this is selfish and I feel unsupported. I’m finding it even more difficult because my twin is pregnant and there’s only a week between due dates and I’ll struggle to watch her pregnancy progress if I opt for abortion. I deep down don’t want the abortion and even went for a private scan which made me more attached. I have booked a surgical abortion for a few days time but the thought is killing me and I’m scared to live with the regret. I have an amazing support network, my own home and a good job, so I know the baby will have what it needs. my only reservation is that this relationship will fail, he may not be a good role model for our child, and if I wasn’t pregnant I probably would have ended it already, can anyone share similar experiences?

OP posts:
CasaBonita · 23/10/2021 13:00

This is a very difficult situation for you, I'm sorry.

On the one hand you definitely want this baby, so on that basis I think you should continue.

However you are being very sensible in considering the impact of having this man involved, for the next 18 years too...

I would very much encourage him to take this new job abroad and then don't make any effort to maintain contact with him. Just let it fizzle out completely. From what you've said I don't think he would be arsed to make the effort with his child anyway

Mysleepingangel · 23/10/2021 13:06

Hi OP,

Sorry about your situation.
I agree with PP, you're in a very good position to be an amazing mum.

And unfortunately he doesn't sound like he'll be involved so you should be ok doing this solo. That is, if you're ok to do so.

Best wishes x

PigeonPigPie · 23/10/2021 13:20

If I were you I would dump the boyfriend and enjoy the baby x

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