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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

To feel terrible about work!

18 replies

Amijustagrump · 19/10/2021 18:54

I'm currently 25 weeks pregnant and have had an awful time of it, horrific sickness and now exhaustion. I work as a teacher so did have summer in the middle but now I am always sick and have had to take 6 days off since the school went back in September! My GP won't sign me off (he says this is normal) and work have reduced my timetable but I feel so awful about it.. please be honest, would you be annoyed with a colleague being absent so much? I feel like I'm being a huge failure- I'm a FTM and have anxiety anyway which isn't helping

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Oodlesofdoodlescockapoodles · 19/10/2021 18:59

Can't comment on how I'd feel about a colleague as I work on my own but you're entitled to be off when you're ill, which you are! I'm sure most sensible people won't have any issue with it. Are you taking anything for the sickness? Is it HG? If so it might be worth trying some different medications to see what helps.

For what its worth, pregnancy is the only time I've taken time off work sick, people say "you're pregnant, not ill!" but it's very possible to be both. Try not to worry too much 😊

Original poster

Amijustagrump · 19/10/2021 19:07

Thank you

I was on medication and then ran out (and my GP is being reluctant to renew my prescription! He isn't much use tbh)
I think I'm just overthinking it, when I'm at work people are so supportive- so much so in was my boss who told me to go home today- but I live in fear of getting a bad reputation

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Flutterby8 · 19/10/2021 19:24

I always feel terrible if I have to take time off because it just means on some days, my team struggle which I hate the thought of.
Ive had a few days off sick during this pregnancy (also my first pregnancy) and it wasnt a decision I took lightly. But I needed it.
I too have had HG since the begining and on some days it has just been impossible to get myself together and go to work.
My team have been amazing, couldnt be any more supportive if they tried. Even when ive felt awful about it, they have been great.
If any of my team were in my position i would never think badly of them because some people do struggle with pregnancy, and being in that position, i sympathise!

Take the time you need, youre entitled to it. Its a hard job growing a human so you have to keep yourself fit and healthy too!

ArseInTheCoOpWindow · 19/10/2021 19:35

I think you need to find another gp, he sounds shit.

Original poster

Amijustagrump · 19/10/2021 20:05

@ArseInTheCoOpWindow honestly I agree! "Its normal to feel tired you're pregnant.." was not a helpful comment when I need to be with it enough to teach grade 9 GCSE content and I'm on my feet all day

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Original poster

Amijustagrump · 19/10/2021 20:06

@Flutterby8 thank you! Everyone at work has been lovely but I still worry

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ArseInTheCoOpWindow · 19/10/2021 20:07

I was a teacher. Pregnancy is a nightmare. Any other doctor would sign you off.

CheeseMaiden · 19/10/2021 20:08

I’m shocked by your GP’s response, is there another one that you can see instead?
Hope you start to feel better soon

SickAndTiredAgain · 19/10/2021 20:16

See a different GP. Mine offers to sign me off every time I call for a new prescription of anti sickness pills. I actually don’t need to be, I’m wfh and can manage at the moment, but your GP sounds awful.

As for would I be annoyed at a colleague taking time off, no, not at all. I was signed off for 2 months last pregnancy and it’s miserable.

coldsandinsleepingbags · 19/10/2021 20:19

Please speak to a different GP. The messaging from your current one is shocking. I ended up signed off work for nearly 3 months in one of my pregnancies as was so physically and mentally ill (signed off in 2 week, then 4 week increments following review with GP and occupational health) . And that was for a job where I was mostly working from home with a reasonable amount of flexibility. That didn't matter - I could barely make it out of bed. OH through work were also adamant that I didn't return to work until I was feeling totally better as they didn't want me returning too soon to then get worse again. Please please speak to a new GP (and if you can find the energy at all, put in a formal complaint about the one you have seen so far). Hope you start to feel better soon! X

coldsandinsleepingbags · 19/10/2021 20:25

Just to be clear - I'm not saying you have to be bed bound to warrant signing off sick. Quite the contrary... If you don't feel well enough to work, you're not well enough to work. You absolutely should be putting your health and wellbeing front and centre to take the best care of your baby. I say this as I struggled so much to accept that I needed extended time off work. But I would never question or judge someone for being off sick. In terms of whether colleagues will be bothered or not. Some will be good people whose only concern will be your wellbeing and some may well be a bit pissed off because they lack empathy and compassion. They needn't be your concern. You just focus on you and your baby.

Original poster

Amijustagrump · 19/10/2021 20:45

Thank you all! It hadn't actually dawned on me that the GP should have done more, I just assumed that was the reaction I would get from anyone. I just have really overthought this and was worried people would start thinking badly of me, especially when before summer I had several days off for morning sickness too. I'm happy to hear that no one thinks I'm being outrageous or taking the piss by being absent!

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peaches1991 · 19/10/2021 21:03

I'm also a teacher and I completely understand how you feel - I think we are conditioned to feel bad for being off! My headteacher is so understanding but I still worry I'm letting my department down when I'm off. That said, I don't think anyone would hold it against a pregnant woman to take time off and teaching 30 teenagers five times a day is hard enough already, without also growing another person!

peaches1991 · 19/10/2021 21:03

Also definitely find a different GP - preferably female!

Original poster

Amijustagrump · 19/10/2021 21:16

@peaches1991 it is definitely ingrained into teaching! My head has had no issues at all, he actually reduced my timetable last week for after half term, and I know the department dont mind at all but I still worry myself! My classes even all know I'm pregnant now and have been so sweet but its hard

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peaches1991 · 19/10/2021 21:21

It sounds like your school are really supportive which is great. I found in my last pregnancy that the students are really supportive and excited for you, although I still find myself worrying about what will happen with my exam classes when I go off (I'm currently 9 weeks but likely I'll be off by Easter as it's twins!).

Derbee · 19/10/2021 23:24

I would try and have an appointment with a different GP. There is no good reason not to prescribe you anti sickness medication. I’m currently 17w4d and have a prescription for 4 weeks at a time, after which the GP likes to review. Every month, she renews my prescription without a fuss. Your GP doesn’t sound very sympathetic. Start with asking for cyclizine - it’s the most common starting medication and is safe in pregnancy.

Oodlesofdoodlescockapoodles · 19/10/2021 23:29

@Amijustagrump totally agree with others- if you're still feeling or being very sick, do try a different (female) GP. I got through 4 different types of anti sickness before I found one that helped. There's several you can try. Whereas in my first pregnancy, I didn't realise it was Hg and my (male) gp wouldn't even prescribe cyclizine saying "it's normal to be sick in pregnancy and we can't do anything about it"

Hope you feel better soon you don't have too much longer left

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