Mat leave, mat pay- what’s yours like? How will you cope?

[Sleeplessem]

Hiya,

I’m pregnant with dc2 due late next month and the reality of mat pay with another child has just hit me like a tonne of bricks.

DD is in nursery 3 days a week, will want to keep her in nursery at least 2 days for normality and a bit of a break for me tbh. She’ll be 26/27 months when dc2 arrives. Dc2 was unplanned. I’ll need to take the full year due to childcare costs, the last 3 months and the smp is scaring me.

I’m lucky where I work does 6 months full pay and 3 smp and the last unpaid. Hopefully I’ll get a bonus too. But I’m barely saving as is. DC1 I got less mat pay 5 months, but obviously less expenses and lock down meant spending less.

How does everyone else cope? Hit me with your best budgeting tips? Xx

Honestly I'd take DC1 out of nursery while you're off, at least until their free hours kick in. Childcare is such a big expense that it can eat up a lit of SMP.

Similar Situation to yours....i will reduce nursery to only once per week and I will be back at work after 5 months. Will be working until I can (39 weeks is the plan, if health allows).
Starting budgeting rn.

Hi OP.
I wish there was a magic answer for this! I’d make a list of all your outgoings and see where you can trim costs. We went through everything: gas and elec, any packages/phone/tv as well as general day to day expenses.

For us it was our tv package/internet and food which saved the most money alongside just being more careful/aware of spending (sounds so obvious don’t mean to be patronising!) After recovering from birth as I was at home and I loved cooking I was able to make really good shopping lists and meals with minimal waste as well as ensuring everyone had a packed lunch so not tempted to go to the shops. It also stopped the cost of eating out which we did far too often. Not working too meant I wasn’t buying coffees and lunch but did treat myself to once a week coffee and cake with other mums

I bought bundles of clothes of eBay, so many of them with tags in they’d never been worn and carried that on for DD nursery clothes as they get hammered I don’t want to buy new. Would you be willing to try to sell items in return as baby grows out of them?

I tried to go to free groups and classes when I could, our local library had one as did the local children’s centre.

Good luck and enjoy your mat leave x

I'm on SMP. We're fortunate that DP can cover the childcare costs for our older DC. I've saved for my 'spending money' while I'm on Mat Leave and the money I'll be getting covers the bills I'd normally pay for.

We're just having to cut back on putting money into savings while I'm off.

It’s a good shout @Hunkydory99, i think that’s the problem with dh and I we fritter money away, not in the gambling or anything drastic sense but in the oh crap forgot to take meat out of the freezer let’s order in or oh let’s get lunch out/ grab a coffee. This needs to stop.

We need a new car too, ours just isn’t big enough to get 2 loads of baby crap in 😂. I think whilst I’m on full pay dd can stay in nursery as is but when we got to smp will need to cut her days. She’s a sep baby so will get her free hours in the new year. Need to enquire what that looks like, if they even it out over the year or if it’s just during term time. What do people do then? Move to a nursery school so they can juggle annual leave with school hols? God there is so much to think about.

We earn decent salaries too I think, over 75k combined, and I’m thinking we might struggle a bit. Really feel for people with less generous mat leaves, it’s not fair xx

We are very similar situation op.
Combines salary just over 75k
I will have a 27month old when baby comes in Nov. He currently goes to nursery 4 days a week and my parents have him one day a week.
I think your package is better than mine and I have saved anything really.

My package is 6 weeks full oayy, then week 7-39 on 50% pay then weeks 40-52 on nothing.
I do expect a small bonus and DH will get a good bonus which is usually pretty good.

I'm thinking if cutting my son's nursery days to 3 and my parents I think would take him overnight on the say they usually have him and bring him back in the afternoon the following day. That would save us £200+ a month.
We are exactly like you in the disorganised foot category. So I'm really going to focus on batch cooking or at least meal planning because if that goes well we always save a hell of a lot of money
Currently we spend over £500 on food in month and that's just me,DH and DS who gets a lot of meals at nursery anyway. It's quite shocking!

I meant to say maybe you'd be better decreasing nursery days now too because that will save you money rather than leaving it to when your on SMP only.

Oh and another thing, sorry I keep remembering stuff!

I read in my work maternity policy that my current pension contributions would stay the same and that if I want to change them I have to specifically tell them. I don't think I'm going to because the pension scheme we have is incredible and so I don't want to lose a year of their generous contribution. I think we can stretch to keep my pension the same but it could be an option for you if required. I'd check your policy/benefit scheme.

We’re twinning @JasonMomoasgirlfriend! I’m due end of nov 25th to be precise lol.

We got better with evening meal planning and using our slow cooker but it’s lunches when dd is at nursery we’re awful at and ended up ordering from uber eats and stuff which is like an extra £4 delivery, sounds nothing but adds up.

We’ve been spoiling dd over the summer too, days out and little trips before baby comes, knowing we won’t be able to after baby, but then we inevitably ended up eating out and bam another £50 gone 😭😭

Gosh, our combined salaries are only about £45k and I only get SMP, and we are saving for a deposit to buy a house, you will be more than fine! We have taken DC1 down to 2 days a week of nursery as soon as I finished work. She used to go 3 days a week but we don't need the childcare now obviously and even though she now gets her free hours, with the additional day and the consumables top ups we are saving about £50 a week which over the course of a year is a lot of money for us. We also re-using as much as possible from DC1. We have obviously had to buy consumables, and we've bought a few extra things too like a new buggy as our old one was falling apart (half price in a sale), buggy board, secondhand bedside crib (we had a rental with DC1 which doesn't exist anymore), new mattresses etc. We have been pretty good throughout my pregnancy at saving money and not frittering it away too, e.g. we rarely eat out, and obviously a lot of my pregnancy was variously loose lockdowns plus I had HG for the first 24 weeks or so, so I was at home almost all that time not spending money! When we go out we usually take packed lunches, had loads of picnic lunches over the summer which DD loves. We rarely get takeaways either. Most of our weekend spending is fuel to/from places to entertain DD, and entrance fees for things to entertain her like soft play and so on plus little bits and bobs like drinks at soft play or ice cream in the park. So we still spend pretty freely but we do save a lot by not having loads of proper meals out and that kind of thing.

DH wants to keep her there, he thinks taking her out might break her normalcy.

MIL watches her one day a week whilst we wfh and tbh she’s just not good with her, don’t feel like she’s a suitable alternative to nursery. But just decreasing her one day a week will save us £200 a month. Hopefully this baby is an ‘easy’ baby and after the newborn stage can reduce her days.

My pension contribution stays the same, I’m really hesitant to drop it as like you @JasonMomoasgirlfriend I’ve got quite a good scheme and where I worked before was atrocious was like 1% max so I’ve barely got anything from my first 5 years in work xx

Ha I'm due 29th!

Yes I totally get it. Could you increase the qty so you have leftovers for lunch?
Days out really rack up don't they? It is a worry but I remember being worried the first time and we were ok but the childcare costs are expensive. We are £850+ a month so if I just took him out we'd be laughing but he really benefits from it and I'd not get any rest if he wasn't in nursery. Makes me sound like a terrible mum but I'm so tired already!

We’ve been freezing our left overs for when baby comes so we can make sure we have meals during the newborn haze. We’ve made a vow to to omelettes, fish finger sandwiches and veggie burgers for lunch to avoid the call of McDonald’s and the £5 delivery charge 😂

Yes I agree about the normalcy of keeping then in. It's tricky to know what's best but I think I'm kind of erring on the reduction of one day and saving £200 a month is a good start. Still get best of both worlds.

Last year we made a NY resolution of zero takeaways for the whole year. We both agreed and actually found it relatively easy. I think I had one hankering and same for DH but because it wasn't the same time we managed to pull each other out of it. I think we saved a hell of Alot of money doing that! I will suggest to DH about doing that again next year.

Honestly, pull her out of nursery.
The year where both are FT at nursery, even with free hours is ££££££, but if you can get through that year, it gets cheeper every year. It's really tough for a year or 2, but in the long run, you are saving a really expensive nursery year by having them close together. Mine are 24 months apart.

DD is at school so we only pay for breakfast club which will stop. We have a nice wedge of savings and maternity pay isn't too bad at my job.
When I had DD 5 years ago we were students and an NQT so I had to go back to work when she was 16 weeks old and all my money went on childcare so hoping for a bit longer this time.

That’s a good shout, we’ve put ourselves on one meal ‘out’ (takeaway or cafe/ restaurant etc) a month. Just pissed off at myself that we’ve frittered away god knows how much by being lazy.

2 kids in childcare, god help me. I’d have hoped I’d have had a promotion before falling preggo again but alas no. Hopefully something will come dH way

I feel it's not really fair to the child though @PeonyTime if they enjoy nursery and get a wide range of activities and development stuff to do?
I think Ds would hate to be at home with me and the baby cause I just wouldn't be able to do the things nursery offer.

I am pregnant with baby number 2 due 5th Nov. I only get stat maternity pay and my husbands salary is 19k. We get a universal credit top up every month.

Our other child is 3 and a half so he does get free nursery hours, but nursery still charge us £10 a day for his meals and he goes 2 days a week so thats £80 a month average.

I actually worked out that once this baby arrives, and my maternity pay kicks in we will be £200 better off per month. Its mad.

I guess it depends on how you use your maternity leave, @JasonMomoasgirlfriend.
Personally, no, I dont think DS1 missed out by being at home. We went to the park, met up with friends, went to toddler groups, cooked.....
There is nothing that a switched on SAHM cant give that a nursery can at that age, imo. And yes, we used nursery FT before and after maternity.

Oh wow your situation sounds so similar to mine. My DD will be just under 3 when baby arrives and my company sick pay policy is the exact same. 6 months full pay, 3 months SMP and then nothing but I think this will be our last baby so I would like to take the full year.

I'm keeping my DD in her nursery twice a week for the routine/time for me to have with baby/to ensure she still has her place if she needs it when I return to work. However she is due to start nursery next September so this will help with costs if she gets a place as that will be around the time my SMP stops too. However will need to enrol baby around November/December time to get him settled before I go back so not for too long but still.

I am holding on to some holidays and asking for them to be paid as an initial little bonus and thankfully my husband is the higher earner so can support us on his wage if necessary, but will definitely miss my income by the end of mat leave, especially as it will be the run up to Christmas!

I think I suffered undiagnosed PPD unfortunately and due to lockdown was just me and DS so I have no idea how this time around will go!
I've noticed a big decrease in contact from friends lately and I honestly can't think of one to meet up with during the day.
I will definitely attend baby groups so maybe I can meet and make friends there.

That’s the same here! I really struggled with dd, she had a tongue tie that went undiagnosed, pressure to breastfeed which was so difficult due to the TT and she never slept, so those first months were awful. That’s my hesitation to pull her out of nursery too (she loves it and has developed loads there too) how will I cope with 2 young ones. I get a bit worried about that, at least if she’s in nursery for a while I’ll hopefully be able to rest a bit xx

We are the same. Omg are you in Scotland? I'd love to meet up with my twin :D

Probably a bit late now but main thing I've been doing is paying in full nursery fees to the government account, rather than the fee minus the 20% government top up, so there is surplus in there to cover DC1s nursery whilst I'm on SMP. He currently does 4 days a week and will be going down to three just before DC2 arrives.