PTSD following recurrent losses.

[LuluF91]

Hi,
I feel like today is the day I've finally broken down and can admit I am mentally far from ok. I have had recurrent losses, the last one being extremely traumatic and I am 11 weeks pregnant now. The nightmares of bleeding or being told their is no heartbeat are happening almost every night. I want to be excited but I feel detached. I am expecting now that I will be told I've had a missed miscarriage. Is this a normal reaction? Will I be ok after my 12 week scan? I have a scan at approx 7 weeks which showed a heartbeat so I should be happy but I've read so many sad stories on here. I'm getting less and less sleep every night and on top of it my toddler is going through some real violent behaviour that I am struggling to manage. Feeling very fragile and just need to know I'm not the only one :(

Please contact your MW and ask to be put in touch with the perinatal mental health team. They will be able to help you.

Also your GP, you need the contact number for your local mental health team, PTSD can be complicated, especially when dealing with baby and pregnancy loss as its probably one if the few traumatic experiences that you are actively aiming to repeat. But there is help. I'm so sorry you've suffered, there is help available.

Hi, also a ptsd sufferer after traumatic losses ❤️

It's crap, it's so difficult to deal with but reach out to midwife and she can put the mental health team in place for your pregnancy. I'm currently 18 weeks and although I feel a bit more relaxed than I did the first few months. I'm still a wreck and struggling with nightmares and flashbacks. I think the best thing for us is just the extra support. Maybe ask for extra scans and maybe more frequent midwife appointments to listen to heartbeat. That's what's in place for myself and the extra reassurance does help xx

Just to mention, every scan I go to I don't expect a heartbeat. So you are completely normal... Well normal for us PTSD sufferers anyways. My 12 week scan was the worse scan to wait for but just try look at the positives than the negatives. I know its easier said than done but clinging onto some hope is the only thing that got my through the few torturous weeks xx

Hi @LuluF91, you poor thing! Me too. Was diagnosed with PTSD and am now 5+3 and so scared I'm barely doing anything! Having more daytime flashbacks than nightmares, but totally sympathise. Have now caught a cold which is really causing me to panic so much more than is rational, but am finding being able to ask things on here really helpful and hopefully you will too.

Somebody I spoke to suggested I write a letter for the midwife explaining how I feel, as that might be less distressing than retelling it verbally and it can also be passed on to the mental health team. I've definitely found writing it down to be less traumatic than saying it out loud.

You're not alone

Thankyou so much. Its so much easier having someone who can relate to talk to. I had my booking in appointment with the midwife over the phone and she asked had I been feeling anxious and I just laughed and said "who wouldn't be?" I have an appointment in person with her on the 7th so I'll discuss it with her then. I've really been just trying to deal with the anxiety but it's been steadily increasing, I thought I would be ok once I'd had that initial early scan but it didn't change anything actually.