Serious pregnancy/mum guilt

[gailplattshairbrush]

I'm 9 weeks pregnant and have a ds10 from a previous relationship. My pregnancy so far hasn't been horrendous but I have been very tired and constantly nauseas. Today I woke up feeling exhausted even after a long sleep last night and have lounged around all morning while poor ds entertains himself. It got me thinking how tough it will be to be pregnant and deal with a newborn when I already have a child to be responsible for. I already feel like I'm letting him down through tiredness and feeling unwell, how much is that going to continue when the baby is born and I'm totally focused on caring for it?

Obviously I never had this before as my ds was my first and during pregnancy I only had myself to worry about.

I'm also worried that the age gap will make it tough to give them both what they need. I suspect that by the time the baby is toddler age ds will be wanting to be with his friends and live his own life a bit more anyway. But even so it's suddenly hitting me the reality of having two kids when I've been used to being a mum of one for so long.

Any advice? Experience? I'm sorry if this sounds really pathetic to those with lots of children 🙈

Bump

I have a 10 yo who is more than happy to occupy themselves when I’m not feeling great.
I’m currently 23weeks pregnant and my 10 yo is very excited to become a big sibling for the first time.

@ImStayingInside that makes me feel a little better thank you, we haven't told my ds yet. Are you concerned about the age gap at all?

I do, but I have made a big fuss of them being my little helper when the baby arrives and they have been able to help choose things for the baby etc.
I think what I’ll find hard is not letting LO be very influenced by 10yo and growing up too quickly.
My 10yo will be 4 weeks off being 11 by the time baby is here and is already planning picking baby up from school when they can drive! So it’s all positive at the minute, I’m sure there will be some hurdles, but we’ll get over them as a new family of 4!

I wouldn't overthink this, I think in first trimester especially when you are feeling really tired and useless it's easy to feel like you'll never be able to function normally again but you will! I have a sibling much younger than me with a similar age gap and it was absolutely fine -- I loved having a baby sibling!

@gailplattshairbrush I'm a little late to your post but I am currently pregnant and have 8&10 year olds. I'm finding they are past the age point where they'd feel jealousy and generally excited about having a baby.

They also look after me because I'm soooo incredibly sick. Mine are girls and act like little mummy's already 😂