Advice from second time mums who had c-section with first

[NEAKT5]

Hi sorry this is a long post, I think I’m just looking for a little vent and hopefully some advice from people who have been in the same position as I don’t know anyone who has!

Currently 27 weeks with baby boy number 2 and have my consultant appointment next week to discuss the previous emergency C-section and birth this time.

Little background on birth number 1, June 2020 (will be an 18 month gap between them) was in early labour for about 36 hours contractions on and off never consistent barely slept. Water broke at 4am on the Monday at home, waters turned green had to be monitored at the hospital from 8am. I ended up with a fever and high heart rate, covid test done and bloods etc which they determined was likely an infection but didn’t know what. Continued labour with gas and air and got to 9cm but was stuck for hours until they decided on the section at 8pm and had the section at 9pm. I was utterly exhausted and didn’t expect to be recovering from surgery with an infection. Baby had infection too and had to be on antibiotics too, ended up being e-coli in my placenta. We had to stay for 5 days, no visitors as it was at the height of Covid so fiancée wasn’t allowed back after he left the morning after baby was born and it was a very difficult and upsetting first week of my sons life. So all that has made be quite apprehensive of this next birth.

I am torn between another section and a VBAC every day and change my mind constantly. The VBAC would hopefully mean an easier recovery for me and no long hospital stay so I can get home to my son and fiancée with baby and I would love if I could have that. However the thought of all that labour experience again to end in another emergency section or worse the thought of the uterine rupture risk is putting me off trying the VBAC. My midwife has said there’s no reason I can’t do it but not sure what the consultant will say yet. I feel that the section would be the safest way to get baby out without the worry of him getting distressed or anything going wrong so that pushes me towards that but the thought of no driving, scar recovery and not being able to pick my toddler up is hard!

I suppose I’m just looking for what made people decide on another section or the VBAC because I just can’t stop changing my mind! I’ll need to have some kind of decision or at least a better idea by next week for the appointment!

Thank you if you read this far

@NEAKT5 I'm the same. Needed to get another car seat and keep putting it off - T minis 10 weeks!

I only had a 2nd baby as the consultant at my birth debrief assured me i could get an elcs! First birth ended up emcs after baby got stuck, back to back, following induction, rushed to theatre and lost 3 litres of blood. Recovery was awful.

2nd baby, my waters at went at 1am, 6 days before scheduled cs. Hung on at home until 4am as didn't want to call childcare too early, in end had no option as contractions had started. On the motorway, contractions ramping up at 5am was not the chilled experience I wanted! But thankfully still got cs and baby was born just before 7am. Much less blood loss, felt much better, and got home around 3pm next day.

There's 18m between mine and 2nd cs was totally different, even though emcs too in the end. I recovered better and managed to BF after not working for us first time round. Just be prepared that your planned date may change if baby has other ideas!!

@Sprintfinish Oh no don’t say that haha! No the consultant did tell me that 1 in 10 women go into labour before 39 weeks before the section is scheduled for, I was 9 days late with my first so I hope I won’t but I know that they say second time round you aren’t usually late or not by much if you are!

I’m glad it worked out for you, my consultant told me that if I went into labour it’s safer for me to continue with labour closely monitored than to rush for the section but the note in my app also says if I was progressed to 8cm as with my first so I’m not too sure what would happen, I think I would let it happen and see what baby wanted to do!

Did you find it okay to cope with the small age gap and the section? I’m prepared that it will be hard I think it’s more just the worry of DS1 accidentally hurting the stitch and ending up with an infection or having to pick him up once my partner goes back to work and hurting the wound.

@Sprintfinish also I’m glad to hear your breastfeeding experience went better, I managed three weeks with my first but I had to use a nipple shield and I just found it too overwhelming and felt so much relief once I stopped. I’m hoping to get to at least 3 months this time so hopefully the elective section goes well then that will happen.

I’m pregnant with my first and having an elective - just wanted to let you know that they’ve told me if I have my c section in the morning I’ll most likely be out by following evening.

Although they say a long hospital stay (4 days usb) is more likely with a c section it doesn’t seem to be the case with elective ones as long as it all goes to plan x

@Cafeaulait27 That’s reassuring thank you. As my first and I both had an infection after the emergency one we stayed 5 nights, 6 days and I really hope to avoid that this time especially with having my son at home already where he won’t be allowed up to the hospital! I hope all goes well for you when it comes and congratulations X

Definitely have a second C-section. Doctors know how to do this well, especially when they're not under pressure, and you can recuperate and recover during your mat leave.

DD1 was emergency C-section. It was not planned but was actually quite chilled. The surgical team was listening to Bolero. I laboured for about 24hrs and had an epidural for about 12hrs of that. The surgery, mid-morning, was straightforward and recovery was quick. DH was allowed in the theatre and I was holding DD within minutes and transferred to a mat ward by late afternoon. I was home by day 3 and fully mobile. I was driving again after 6 - 7 weeks.

With DD2 all the medicos encouraged VBAC, promising a quicker recovery than a C-section. HAH!! so I went along with it expecting that at some point they'd change their minds and I'd probably have a C-section.

As a result of the VBAC, due to placental adhesion to the scar on my uterus from the previous C-section, I nearly bled out in the birthing room. I spent several hours unconscious in theatre whilst they removed the rest of my placenta and stabilised me. A planned C-section would have avoided that.

Additionally, DD2's 90th percentile head stretched my undercarriage beyond recovery. I spent 2 weeks on a catheter and effectively housebound until sensation returned: not only could I not drive, I couldn't walk any further than to the car! Furthermore, nearly a year later, I had to take time off from work to have reconstructive surgery.

Apologies for the gory details and all best wishes for you and your babies.

@tarheelbaby I’m so sorry to hear you experienced such a trauma!

That has definitely given me reassurance at the fact I have booked a section it’s for the 8th December currently, thank you.

I know I’d worry too much during a Vbac about my scar so I knew it wasn’t the right choice for me. Anyone else I’ve heard from had a successful vbac but I worry about being that person who wouldn’t as I don’t have the best of luck and it seems unfortunately that was the position you ended up in! X

[quote NEAKT5]@OddSockReunion Exactly that’s where I felt the information is unfair, there’s no guarantee that you could fully progress. I had an infection and got to 8/9cm which they said meant I had a very high chance of giving birth vaginally but again there’s no guarantee! The exact same for me, the potential risk to the baby of a Vbac just concerns me too much compared to the section.

I’m currently scheduled for a morning section and she said if all goes well I could be out at lunch the next day and I would love nothing more than that after a 5/6 day stay with my first during covid where my partner wasn’t allowed in.

Can I ask if you have any tips for recovering at home in those early days? The only positive to the hospital stay was the bed that could move and even then it was tough getting up those first few days!

Exactly I know he can go to my mums and my partner can collect him again before bed so it will be like a normal week day for him! Although I am already feeling a little sad at the thought of him trying to jump on me with excitement and having to stop him.[/quote]
It sounds like your body had already been through a lot and then you had an emergency section, so the recovery from that would be very different to that from a planned section. The damage to the mother tends to be much less when it is planned rather than rushed as an emergency, so you're likely to find the birth itself and recovery much easier! I had two planned sections but friends who have had one of each say they were worlds apart.

I drank loooooads of water afterwards as you have to wee a certain amount before they let you go home. Also good to get up and move around as soon as you can afterwards. I took it really easy for a couple of days at home both times and then felt fine, just a little sorr.

@OddSockReunion that’s what I’m hoping, no long labour this time or infection affecting me at the same time 🤞🏻

Oh the water is a good tip thank you! I think the fact I was on my own last time I was up and down more than I would have been if my partner was there but I think in the long term it actually helped me heal so ill definitely try to move a bit still each day.

I had placenta previa with my 2nd so thankfully a 2nd cs was doubly my plan. I found recovery 1st time round worse as the birth was traumatic. I've never had an issue with my wound or any pain following either cs. I stuck to the rule not to lift anything heavier than baby, so cuddled my eldest on the couch etc but didn't lift him, or change his nappy for weeks as he had a tendency to kick. I was fortunate as DP was off for 10 weeks so he was largely on toddler duties, and I was on baby duties.

@Sprintfinish that’s reassuring that you didn’t have issues afterwards. I think that will be the hardest part, no lifting the toddler but I know it’s the best way to recover. My DP will only have 2 weeks off but I can have my mum up if I feel I need her, I think the hardest part will be not driving and being stuck at home for 4 weeks when DP is in work as my mum doesn’t drive!

[quote NEAKT5]@OddSockReunion that’s what I’m hoping, no long labour this time or infection affecting me at the same time 🤞🏻

Oh the water is a good tip thank you! I think the fact I was on my own last time I was up and down more than I would have been if my partner was there but I think in the long term it actually helped me heal so ill definitely try to move a bit still each day.[/quote]
I am sure the long labour and stress beforehand then the emergency situation and infection made a huge difference to your recovery last time. I hope you have a really different experience this time OP. I have very happy memories of the births of both of my children through planned sections. The same as with a vaginal birth, you can have a birth plan with preferences about how you want things to happen e.g. baby passed to you asap after birth. My children were feeding and having cuddles already while I was being sewn up. They can lower the curtain slightly so you can watch as the baby is born (but see nothing gruesome!). You can have music on if you like.

Both my sections were pre planned. Number one, baby was breech. Recovery was much easier than expected.
Baby number 2 was due 21 months later. Consultant wanted me to try a vbac and wanted me to agree to induction with a new balloon method at 40 weeks if spontaneous labour hadn't begun.
I didn't feel comfortable with it and I was worried about ending up with an emergency section if it all.went wrong. It was strange, he was really pushy about this balloon method and even put itbon my notes after I said no!!
I decided the repeat section was best for me, I actually had to get a new consultant to sort it as my original one was so against it.
So my advice is know what you want and don't let anyone push you into something you don't. Whether it's a vbac or a repeat section, it's your birth and your choice.
And if you do go for the repeat section, the recovery will be much easier than after an emergency procedure so try not to worry too much xx

@OddSockReunion I’ve read about being able to still have a birth plan and I will definitely be asking for baby to be put on me as soon as possible and I like the idea of lowering the curtain too! With my first they held him up and they did put him on me but he ended up needing to be taken away to have fluid pumped out I believe and checked over.

Thanks for all of your advice x

@MarchingOnTogether Oh that’s not very good that the consultant was so pushy! I had read that some could say no but thankfully mines just pointed out all of the risks and benefits to each but she didn’t try to push me either way and said she believes I made an informed decision.

I was booked for a balloon induction with my first too but thankfully went into labour two days before it as I was dreading it!

Thank you I’m sure all will go well 🤞🏻 xx

My DP will only have 2 weeks off but I can have my mum up if I feel I need her, I think the hardest part will be not driving and being stuck at home for 4 weeks when DP is in work as my mum doesn’t drive!

Most people I know who had planned sections were back driving within about 2w.

I've had 2 elective sections, but can't drive.

The beauty of a section is that you get to avoid all of the pain of labour, and will meet your baby in a pain free, non exhausted way 😃

My age gap was under 2y, and we managed fine. I avoided carrying my toddler for about 2w, but we had lots of cuddles on the sofa still, and it wasn't a problem. I was basically healed within about a week.

@Moonbabysmum I have heard people say that, I’ll need to check my insurance first but maybe if I’m feeling up for it I could be driving earlier too.

I am looking forward to that this time, with my first I was so exhausted surviving on about 4 hours sleep on and off over the 36 hours of contractions so I really hope this time I’m able to enjoy those first hours with DS2 more!

Oh that sounds reassuring regarding your toddler too, thank you.